In bad need of encouragement

[[ma...]]

My legs are so weak I can't get in the shower this morning. At three months out I can't believe this is so bad.  I am crying this morning because I am so frightened that this is permanent.  I have really been trying to push myself through it, but it is taking all I have to keep on.  I just feel like giving up and staying off my legs it is so painful.  I just need to know if anyone else has gone through this and when did it get better for you.  Should I buy a bike?  Is that even going to help because so far being active hasn't helped.

 

~Mama2

[[ha...]]

I know it's hard Mama2, you are still very early in your healing. For me it went from constant throbbing pain everywhere to just plain muscle fatigue and weakness. I know how you feel. My reasoning is that I have been anxious for so many years on the ativan, my nervous system was out of control! And know my body is weak from it all. I hope we both see healing very soon.

Did you go through a lot of anxiety?

[[ma...]]

I only had anxiety at the very end of my taper. I do wake up with the morning dreads.  I think that is from the fact I am just dreading how bad I will feel when I get up.  I did have extreme exhaustion throughout my taper and the weak legs.  It just seems like it won't let up.

 

 

[[Te...]]

What you are going through now is acute withdrawal, which seems to take 2-4 months. Trust me, it does pass.

 

I'm at 6.5 months and I'm dealing with insomnia and a nasty ol' wave, which I hear from a lot of people is pretty common right before they turn a corner at 7 months. So, I have to just hang in there, and you do too. This WILL pass.

 

Don't compare how you are now to how you were in taper. When you were tapering you still had benzos in your body. By now, at three months, the benzos are out of your system and your body and brain are struggling to learn how to deal with "real life" without the benefit of artificial emotional numbing agents. It takes TIME for your brain to heal.

 

Hang in there. This isn't much fun, but it will eventually begin to fade. I've had a couple of good windows and several waves. I'm not learning that waves are actually NOT bad, because they mean that my brain and body are dealing with making some changes, which seems to result in a window afterwards.

 

So, please, hang in there. In time it will get better.

 

[[ma...]]

Hi Tex,

 

Thank you for responding.  I thought the acute phase ended at 90 days.  I guess this isn't set in stone obviously.  I have been waiting so long for the 3 month mark to come.  I had not idea I would have to wait 7 months to fee better.  Sorry for the whining. 

 

Did you have the weak legs?  I know I am not supposed to compare. Just curious.

 

Sorry you are in a wave also. I am hopeful things will began to improve soon.

 

 

 

 

[[Te...]]

I don't think you have to wait for seven months to feel better. I leveled off at about four months and was on an "emotional plateau" for about 6-7 weeks. No good days, no bad days -- just kind of emotionally flat. I think in retrospect that it was my brain healing after the four months of acute w/d hell.

 

The "emotional plateau" ended abruptly one day. I woke up one morning and felt like crap for a couple of days, then I woke up and had a gorgeous 3-day wave, which sadly ended six days ago and I'm back in a wave. I'm more positive about waves now, as I've begun to realize that even though I am in a wave, it will pass, and usually when it passes I'll find myself in a window. So, healing is taking place.

 

You should be through the worst of it in a week or two, if not sooner. I remember feeling good for a few days at about three months, and then slipping back into acute w/d for about 3 weeks, and then the "emotional plateau" came drifting in.

 

This is not a linear process, where you gradually get better. It's more like a roller coaster ride, up down and all around, and all you can do is hold on because you know that sooner or later the ride WILL end!

 

Hang in there. It just takes time and as positive an attitude as you can muster.

[[er...]]

My legs are so weak I can't get in the shower this morning. At three months out I can't believe this is so bad.  I am crying this morning because I am so frightened that this is permanent.  I have really been trying to push myself through it, but it is taking all I have to keep on.  I just feel like giving up and staying off my legs it is so painful.  I just need to know if anyone else has gone through this and when did it get better for you.  Should I buy a bike?  Is that even going to help because so far being active hasn't helped.

 

 

Mama

Yes , please buy bike .

I was like you cannot walk ,  from second month till 15 months I was on bike daily .

Bike was the best exercise , when you can even move . Fresh air , distraction , movement , if you to tired go slow , if you fel better faster .

  I posted in past always how only ONLY bike helped me .

  Ride bike killed all my w/d .  When the come back  I jump on bike again.

Even bike all nights , all night .  Bike is gentle exercise , outdoor is the best , drink lots of water .

Love and good luck Erika

Love Erika

 

~Mama2

[[ma...]]

Hi Tex,

 

Thank you for responding.  I thought the acute phase ended at 90 days.  I guess this isn't set in stone obviously.  I have been waiting so long for the 3 month mark to come.  I had not idea I would have to wait 7 months to feel better.  Sorry for the whining. 

 

Did you have the weak legs?  I know I am not supposed to compare. Just curious.

 

Sorry you are in a wave also. I am hopeful things will began to improve soon.

[[ma...]]

Didn't mean to bump this.  Was correcting a spelling error. 

[[er...]]

Mama

did you read my replay ? Erika

[[ma...]]

Erika,

 

Thank you.  I intend on getting me a bike.  This is encouraging news, thank you so much.

 

~Mama2

[[er...]]

Erika,

 

Thank you.  I intend on getting me a bike.  This is encouraging news, thank you so much.

 

~Mama2

 

 

 

Mama

You can read from my post year ago , was only bike was help me .

one  very good doctor told me about that . Every time in wave or cannot walk etc , take bike  and go .  ten time in day for 10 minutes ,  , but start slowly  to build  for longer distance .

Bike  help me like nothing else  quit benzo .

You will feel better after 5 minutes outside  on bike , you will see .