How to speak to new doctor?

[[Th...]]

As some of you may know I reinstated at .5mg 3x daily, (Clonazepam), and it barely works now. I have a new psychiatrist on the 16th. I want to switch over to a different medication. Here's the problem. I don't know how I am going to get him to be receptive to me without it seeming like I am just "asking for drugs". It's awfully suspicious on a first visit and I hate it. I also get my refills on the 13th for the meds I am on now. So, he'll probably ask about that. I just don't know what to do or say to make this work. What should I say? I don't know what I can possibly say to a new doctor on a first visit to get him to say "Ok, here's what we'll do" as far as switching over and creating a taper plan. I tried last time with a doc who has my full history and he got enraged at me. I see so many stories of people who say that they've just switched over and "NOW IT WORKS". Really? How DOES that work? I always come off as suspicious because I am naturally a very nervous person and my tics make me appear as if I am jonesing for some sort of drugs. Any advice? This has to work because I have kindled, didn't know that was what I was doing til this last detox, and I am scared out of my mind.

[[na...]]

As some of you may know I reinstated at .5mg 3x daily, (Clonazepam), and it barely works now. I have a new psychiatrist on the 16th. I want to switch over to a different medication. Here's the problem. I don't know how I am going to get him to be receptive to me without it seeming like I am just "asking for drugs". It's awfully suspicious on a first visit and I hate it. I also get my refills on the 13th for the meds I am on now. So, he'll probably ask about that. I just don't know what to do or say to make this work. What should I say? I don't know what I can possibly say to a new doctor on a first visit to get him to say "Ok, here's what we'll do" as far as switching over and creating a taper plan. I tried last time with a doc who has my full history and he got enraged at me. I see so many stories of people who say that they've just switched over and "NOW IT WORKS". Really? How DOES that work? I always come off as suspicious because I am naturally a very nervous person and my tics make me appear as if I am jonesing for some sort of drugs. Any advice? This has to work because I have kindled, didn't know that was what I was doing til this last detox, and I am scared out of my mind.

 

This is just another of life's "salesman" situations where you need something from somebody else and must use skill and diplomacy to get it. You need him, He doesn't need you.

 

1. Treat him with respect

2. Don't challenge his knowledge. He went to med school and you didn't.

3. Don;t mention the Internet or Benzo Buddies.

4. Don;t use technical terms such as "tolerance withdrawal" and "kindling."

5. Ask questions instead of making statements. For example, instead of saying "I'm in tolerance withdrawal," ask "Could I be getting so used to the drug that it no longer works as well?"

6. Ask if HE thinks it might be a good idea to switch to a different drug.

7. If you say (or imply) that you know more about benzo withdrawal than he does, you will lose him just as you lost the last doc.

8. Don;t be too quick to blurt out what it is you want right off the bat. Try to be diplomatic and let the doc think what you want is his idea, not yours.

9. If he says something you don;t like ask him a question instead of disagreeing right away. For example, if he says withdrawal only lasts a few weeks, then you might ask, "Is that always true? Could I be one of a minority of people who have more trouble? That is much better that saying "Bull shit - I;m different."

10. Count to ten if he says there is more wrong with you than just withdrawal. Be open minded. Perhaps he is right.

11. Don't try to "prove" something to him using annecdotes you saw on Benzo Buddies.

12. Don't disagree with him on unimportant matters. If he says something you don;t believe try asking if it could be different in your case rather than disagreeing outright.

13. If you bring up the Ashton Manual, ask him what he thinks of it. Instead of saying you believe it is the bible, ask if he thinks it might be useful. If he dismisses it then drop the subject.

14. Be willing to lose a battle to win the war. For example, if he never heard of Ashton but you  leave with what you want, then you have won the war. Forget the Ashton Battle of the Benzo Buddies battle.

15. Don;t be negative. Give him positive feedback if he says anything you remotely agree with. If he starts to come your way then say "I never thought of that. That sounds like a good idea." The best salesmen can make the other guy think everything was their idea.

 

In short, remember that you want something from him. You need him, he doesn;t need you. Be open minded and try to remember that he has years of training and will not like it if you come off as thinking you know more than he does. If you use technical terms you learned on Benzo Buddies he will become immediately suspicious. Use everyday language instead.

 

Pretend you are asking your boss for time off work. Be nice. Be respectful. Let him be the boss and the expert.

 

PS Afterthought: You just changed Docs and that could go against you. If you don;t get what you want on this first visit, you might consider going along with whatever the new doc says but asking for a follow up visit in case you are still having problems. It coud take a few visits to build confidence and get to know each other. If you are cooperative and seem open to his ideas, then you might get what you want eventually. That might be better than doctor shopping.

 

If all else fails, put yourself in his hands with an open mind and give his treatment plan a chance. It is more important to get some help from a professional than it is to diagnose yourself and be your own doctor. If you do what he suggests and it doesn;t work, then there will be follow up visits to do a course correction. He wants to help you. There may be some trial and error involved. You will have a chance to give him feedback in future visits.

 

Get rid of the idea that you already know what is best for yourself and all you need him for is write a prescription. Please don't fail again with another doc because you are not open minded enough to listen to him. Do you really believe the absolute final word on withdrawal for absolutely everybody is to be found on this forum? Do you really believe all docs are morons? Give him a chance.

[[Fl...]]

You can always take in the leaflet that comes with the pills too. If you threw it out, have the pharmacy print it out for you. That one page of paper tells clearly and shortly a whole lot of info. I also second the "no technical terms" and do not mention internet forums.

Best of luck! Do whatever is needed to be calm for the appt.

[[Th...]]

I appreciate the advice. Now I know where I screwed up. And I'm not doctor shopping, just getting a second opinion and hopefully a competent doctor. Now if I were seeing multiple doctors and obtaining the same script at the same time, then that'd be a different story

[[la...]]

I appreciate the advice. Now I know where I screwed up. And I'm not doctor shopping, just getting a second opinion and hopefully a competent doctor. Now if I were seeing multiple doctors and obtaining the same script at the same time, then that'd be a different story

 

I agree you are not doctor shopping you are trying to get a better doctor that will help you heal and taper. Seeing more than one Doctor and acquiring more than one prescription is Doctor shopping and drug seeking NOT trying to change doctors. If you have extra pills than you can really look and find one that will help you heal and not keep you sick.

 

It makes me sick to my stomach that we have to "act" and humor a doctor into helping us.

 

 

[[na...]]

It makes me sick to my stomach that we have to "act" and humor a doctor into helping us.

 

I do my best to try to live in world i didn't create. I do a lot more butt kissing to keep my job than to get my scripts refilled!

[[la...]]

It makes me sick to my stomach that we have to "act" and humor a doctor into helping us.

 

I do my best to try to live in world i didn't create. I do a lot more butt kissing to keep my job than to get my scripts refilled!

 

Yeah but do you pay your employer to work???

[[fr...]]

You've had some really good advice here. I would start out by talking about your medical history and other health problems first in order to establish a rapport and find out what he/she is like. You don't need to do everything in one visit either. Keep benzo talk to the minimum.

 

I have decided that although I liked my doctor as a person, he has never really helped me with anything and when I get through withdrawal I am going to seek a new one. Since I don't ever want to take meds again it will be a weird relationship. Maybe I'll just stick with my naturopath who used to be an MD.