Anyone withrdawal multiple times ? Read this.

[[...]]

Not trying to upset anyone but this certainly applies to me as I went through withdrawal roughly 4 times over the last 10 years. I got off the Benzo's each time with only a couple weeks of increased anxiety. This time around the gates of hell were opened.

 

Some doctors wrote the following and I feel the info answers some questions to why I'm having such a rough time. 

 

 

"The severity and length of the withdrawal syndrome is likely determined by various factors, including rate of tapering, length of use and dosage size, and possible genetic factors. Those who have a prior history of withdrawing from benzodiazepines may have a sensitized or kindled central nervous system leading to worsening cognition and symptomatology, and making each subsequent withdrawal period worse."

 

 

Does this apply to any of you?

 

 

 

Fonz

[[Bi...]]

me..its called kindling

[[...]]

Ohhh, you have experienced this???  I said I got off it 4 times, I think it's more like 10-15 times!  No wonder I'm so messed up, even on a low dose. Urgggg..  :'(

 

 

 

[[Go...]]

That is a very good description of what happens to some people who have tried to come off benzos several times.  I have 2 Cts and 1 rapid taper.  This is my 4th time.  I am down to .25 k from 2.2 k starting dose.  My taper will be 29 months long once its completed and it has been hell all the way down... 

 

GG

[[Sa...]]

Can you please tell signs .symptoms of kindling? Could it be getting baseline with no windows.when before you had a window wave  pattern?

[[...]]

Wow Godsgrace, I'm sorry to hear you have had to suffer for so long. I am happy to hear you have been so strong though. I'm certainly cheering you on through this hell ride!

 

How sick did you get the other times you c/t or got off rapidly?  I recall getting off fairly easy the first times with some odd sensations and increased anxiety. The last time I tried I did it fast and ended up in hospital and reinstated on a higher dose.  This time around is beyond HELL. My brain is mush tonight..

 

 

Fonz

[[Go...]]

Fonz,

 

Thank you for the encouragement.  I am really struggling right now with a lot of sxs.  The first time I came off was in April 2009.  My doc told me to cut the .5 pill in half for a week and then in quarters and then stop.  I went into horrible, acute wd.  I had to updose to 1.5 to get stable and then after about 4 weeks, acute wd again while on the K.  We were desperate and I went into a holistic rehab center in San Francisco.  They pulled me off of 1.5mg in 17days.  Again, horrible acute wd.  I made it 40 days off and ended up in the psych ward on a cocktail of meds including benzos.  So, the pdoc that saw me in the ER pulled me off of 3mg of Ativan in 13 weeks.  Once again, acute wd.  It took me all of 2010 and 2011 and 2012 to attempt to taper again.  The doc that is helping me now, got me up to 2.2mg of K and I was very very sick.  With no choice, I started my taper in December of 2012 and Im still tapering.  I am down to .25 k from 2.2mg of k and it is very hard.

 

I get up every day and I feel terrible, but I put my clothes on and get out of the house.  I help with a dog rescue group and try to stay busy.  Most of the time, Im in terrible DR but I say a prayer and ask God to get me through just one day at a time and so far, Im still here. 

 

For me, there will be no healing until I am off and my body learns to live without benzos. 

 

Hope this was not too long.

 

GG

[[...]]

No of course it was not too long 

 

Im sorry to hear your story. Its scary that they put you on a bunch of meds in the institution. Did you have free will to take them or not? Im asking incase i ever end up in one. Many times i felt there was no other choice in relatikn to getting help and having a safe place to be. I dont want to take anymore drugs, i refuse to.

 

Its great to hear you force your self out of the house! That will be good for you and the dogs you help! A+ to that!

 

Keep asking god to help you, you will make it!  Never give up.

 

 

Fonz

[[Sa...]]

Im having 100 x difficult time after second ct of psych hospital injections....i begged them not to nject me ...they told shut up or we will use ropes to tie you to the bed you crazy one....im having no moments of relief for tree weeks now....

[Guest [my...]]

I wonder if it counts if you have tried before (me) and never fully got off? 

[[...]]

Sandy Tree, you have got to be kidding me. Im so sorry that happened to you.  Im so lucky i didnt go in the hospital during an episode, there is NO WAY they could have restrained me after hearing that. They would have to get a tranquilizer gun haha.  You know im not surprised, i can only imagine what thd bastards in those facilities are like.

 

Lets do our best never to go there, ever or again 

 

 

MylittleCappi, i have no clue what effect that would have ? This is all new to me tonight, in sime ways its an answer but its very frustrating.

[[pr...]]

i was in one detox after another every January trying to get off klonopin from 2004 until just this last time 2012.

 

i am still severely kindling. i've done about 12 c/t's my whole life. i also had 7 years benzo free from 1995-2002.

 

 

i shouldn't be alive from this and my brain is still beating down on me 20 months later. but you know what? i am still healing from this! every day and in every way i am healing from this.

 

Cappi,

 

did you only try to get off one time before but never got totally off the benzo's? i'm sure you wouldn't have to worry about the kindling factor. i can feel that there is kindling going on inside my brain. that's exactly what it feels like and what a great word. i guess someone know's something huh? i guess Wiki know's but who inputs Wiki is what i want to know? who knows? :D yes this kindling has surely rotted my brain because it's almost 3 in the morning and i am still typing all right

G'night

[[...]]

Pretty Daisy's, you have had a rough road, i am sorry to hear. Don't feel bad about your 3am, haha it's 7:30am where i am now.. I just can't sleep, I have felt ill off and on all night and now im just a wreck.    im resorting to counting sheep now,  night all!

 

Fonz

 

 

 

 

[Guest [my...]]

i was in one detox after another every January trying to get off klonopin from 2004 until just this last time 2012.

 

i am still severely kindling. i've done about 12 c/t's my whole life. i also had 7 years benzo free from 1995-2002.

 

 

i shouldn't be alive from this and my brain is still beating down on me 20 months later. but you know what? i am still healing from this! every day and in every way i am healing from this.

 

Cappi,

 

did you only try to get off one time before but never got totally off the benzo's? i'm sure you wouldn't have to worry about the kindling factor. i can feel that there is kindling going on inside my brain. that's exactly what it feels like and what a great word. i guess someone know's something huh? i guess Wiki know's but who inputs Wiki is what i want to know? who knows? :D yes this kindling has surely rotted my brain because it's almost 3 in the morning and i am still typing all right

G'night

 

Twice Pretty.  This is my third time but no, not totally off. Not even halfway. 

[[On...]]

Yeah, once before this. Something I probably should have waited out

[[Sa...]]

I red a lot of stories where secind time around of your withdrawal ypu might not be getting windows....just baseline....im so scared of that.........hope4444 had a same experience.....she told her baseline was inhumain.....

[[On...]]

I c/t twice before this with about a week of w/d then back to playing basketball and eating cookies I went. No problems. This time It just wont end.

[[Ch...]]

i was in one detox after another every January trying to get off klonopin from 2004 until just this last time 2012.

 

i am still severely kindling. i've done about 12 c/t's my whole life. i also had 7 years benzo free from 1995-2002.

 

 

i shouldn't be alive from this and my brain is still beating down on me 20 months later. but you know what? i am still healing from this! every day and in every way i am healing from this.

 

Cappi,

 

did you only try to get off one time before but never got totally off the benzo's? i'm sure you wouldn't have to worry about the kindling factor. i can feel that there is kindling going on inside my brain. that's exactly what it feels like and what a great word. i guess someone know's something huh? i guess Wiki know's but who inputs Wiki is what i want to know? who knows? :D yes this kindling has surely rotted my brain because it's almost 3 in the morning and i am still typing all right

G'night

 

Hi Pretty,

 

Ditto here, I've done more c/t's than you can shake a stick at, probably in excess of 20 times (conservative guess).

With the exception of one real nasty one from high dose of valium I was able to basically just dust myself off and get on with life.

And even that one I started to rebound from within a few weeks.

 

This time things are far different and I'm now wondering if maybe I would have done better off c/t'ing rather than tapering.

 

See I never had that big benzo free period that you did (7 years) although I had two really long periods of sobreity from alcohol (10 years and 11 years respectively).

 

Will catch up later.

 

Chinook

 

[[Sv...]]

This is my fourth attempt too. Two c/ts, the third time I only made it half way off, and this time I did a bit better of a taper. It's the longest I've been off.

 

I think one of the hardest things is going to your doctors and having them convince you over and over again that the sensation we feel in withdrawal is the underlying condition. It makes me doubt myself always and as such have reinstated in the past.

 

Is this withdrawal or the underlying condition?  There is no test doctors can give you to answer that one. I'm going to try to last a year and see how things go.

[[Te...]]

I did a c/t in August 2004 and made it 23 days. Then another in April-May of 2011 and last 49 days. I tried a third time in September 2011 and lasted 3 months, 3 weeks. I think I would have made it but the holidays hit and my stupid "rescue doses" led to reinstatement by January 2012. I came off a fourth time on May 26, 2013 and I've been off for six months and one day.

 

I've experienced some kindling, yes, but the one variable that seems to never be addressed is the attitude/determination of the person who does the c/t. In my past attempts, I was making a semi-feeble attempt to quit. I always kept a stash of Valium -- just in case. This time, it all went in the trash, so I have no option.

 

This time I am REALLY motivated to get through this hell and to spend the rest of my life free of benzodiazepines. I am much more determined this time, and I think that, more than anything, is what has helped me make it more than six months.

[[Sa...]]

So if we do this many times its normal to have severe non stop headavhes...feelung of auras...and time to time left side being on fire...

[[...]]

 

I think one of the hardest things is going to your doctors and having them convince you over and over again that the sensation we feel in withdrawal is the underlying condition. It makes me doubt myself always and as such have reinstated in the past.

 

Is this withdrawal or the underlying condition?  There is no test doctors can give you to answer that one. I'm going to try to last a year and see how things go.

 

 

You certainly hit this one good with the hammer. It's terrible huh? I bet a lot of people here can relate to this.

 

It's great to see so many people tuning it. Prior to finding this site I had to follow my own instinct and listen to the "professional" physician. I had no idea that reinstating would be such a bad idea. I guess as I always got off it fairly easy I figured it would remain that way. This being said I had NO IDEA that true benzo withdrawal even existed. Why were we not told before being given this poison??

 

Fonz

[[pr...]]

i was in one detox after another every January trying to get off klonopin from 2004 until just this last time 2012.

 

i am still severely kindling. i've done about 12 c/t's my whole life. i also had 7 years benzo free from 1995-2002.

 

 

i shouldn't be alive from this and my brain is still beating down on me 20 months later. but you know what? i am still healing from this! every day and in every way i am healing from this.

 

Cappi,

 

did you only try to get off one time before but never got totally off the benzo's? i'm sure you wouldn't have to worry about the kindling factor. i can feel that there is kindling going on inside my brain. that's exactly what it feels like and what a great word. i guess someone know's something huh? i guess Wiki know's but who inputs Wiki is what i want to know? who knows? :D yes this kindling has surely rotted my brain because it's almost 3 in the morning and i am still typing all right

G'night

 

Twice Pretty.  This is my third time but no, not totally off. Not even halfway. 

 

Cappi,

 

as long as you haven't done repeated rapid tapers then i think you are free to ever kindle, you know? that's okay it's not even halfway. go as slow as you need to with stuff i say now and God how i wish i did.  i didn't know but then i did. it just got too much and i'd been at it so long. i just wanted off.

[[pr...]]

i was in one detox after another every January trying to get off klonopin from 2004 until just this last time 2012.

 

i am still severely kindling. i've done about 12 c/t's my whole life. i also had 7 years benzo free from 1995-2002.

 

 

i shouldn't be alive from this and my brain is still beating down on me 20 months later. but you know what? i am still healing from this! every day and in every way i am healing from this.

 

Cappi,

 

did you only try to get off one time before but never got totally off the benzo's? i'm sure you wouldn't have to worry about the kindling factor. i can feel that there is kindling going on inside my brain. that's exactly what it feels like and what a great word. i guess someone know's something huh? i guess Wiki know's but who inputs Wiki is what i want to know? who knows? :D yes this kindling has surely rotted my brain because it's almost 3 in the morning and i am still typing all right

G'night

 

Hi Pretty,

 

Ditto here, I've done more c/t's than you can shake a stick at, probably in excess of 20 times (conservative guess).

With the exception of one real nasty one from high dose of valium I was able to basically just dust myself off and get on with life.

And even that one I started to rebound from within a few weeks.

 

This time things are far different and I'm now wondering if maybe I would have done better off c/t'ing rather than tapering.

 

See I never had that big benzo free period that you did (7 years) although I had two really long periods of sobreity from alcohol (10 years and 11 years respectively).

 

Will catch up later.

 

Chinook

 

Chinook,

 

yeah, i basically just dusted myself off time after time with every c/t i did before this last ten years. definitely does catch up with you. and i think the alcohol primes the receptor for more of the kindling factor as i think we discussed before. i drank a lot when i was a teen and early 20's. after i got sober for that 7 years i no longer had a desire to drink. at least you had long periods of no alcohol, that's good. i wish there was a magic bullet for our brain receptor's.

 

thinking of you ~

 

pretty

[[Di...]]

Im having 100 x difficult time after second ct of psych hospital injections....i begged them not to nject me ...they told shut up or we will use ropes to tie you to the bed you crazy one....im having no moments of relief for tree weeks now....

 

Well that was extremely nasty of them to tell you to shut-up.  How inappropriate.  Those kind of so-called professionals should be fired.

 

I'm so sorry you're going through this.