Early Morning Tears

[[ba...]]

I hate this time in the early morning hours.  There are a few people here, but none of my "regular" buddies.  I'm not interested in making new friendships.  But then I see Megan's (moderator) name and I feel a little bit better.  Just a touch of comfort and I want to say thank you to all the moderators.

 

 

 

[[ma...]]

Hi babyrex

 

Its such a lonely journey, and its a hard one but your going to be ok.  I think your doing well. The early morning tears will stop one day, I promise you.

 

It gets better

 

Magrita

[[Be...]]

Margita get the BBs tiara in my book 

[[ba...]]

Hi babyrex

 

Its such a lonely journey, and its a hard one but your going to be ok.  I think your doing well. The early morning tears will stop one day, I promise you.

 

It gets better

 

Magrita

 

Thank you magrita, it's just such a tough night.  I took a small nap earlier and am now faced with a nighttime of no sleep. Thank you for your caring.

 

[[ba...]]

Margita get the BBs tiara in my book 

 

That's nice Benzy,

 

Here we are again, those that are unable to sleep.  And yes, magrita gets a tiara.  Hugs honey.

 

[[fa...]]

Baby Rex, you are right...it is very quite at this time of night here on BB. It gives me a chance to catch up, read posts and get to know you better. 

 

If you get a chance, go outside and look up at the most beautiful full moon  It seems to be a little bit brighter tonight.

 

have a peaceful night.

 

Fan

[[ba...]]

Baby Rex, you are right...it is very quite at this time of night here on BB. It gives me a chance to catch up, read posts and get to know you better. 

 

If you get a chance, go outside and look up at the most beautiful full moon  It seems to be a little bit brighter tonight.

 

have a peaceful night.

 

Fan

 

Thank you fan,

 

On my way.

 

[[ba...]]

fan,

 

Thank you so much!  We had major thunderstorms all day and I haven't gone outside much.  I was successful at cowering under the covers.  The full moon is beautiful!  The sky's have cleared to crystalline brilliance and that moon is superb.  It's kinda like Khan is shining a flashlight into my backyard.  LOL

 

Thank you so much fan!

 

[[Be...]]

the moon is cool tonight, I just got back inside from walking around at 5:30 in the morning, didnt even need a light...

Im so stuck in this insomnia routine I dont think I'll ever get straightened out, a 2 hour nap everyday at mid-morning aint cutting it...

[[ba...]]

I know.  3-4 hours a day sometimes.  And my naps are toxic.  Crap

[[Be...]]

I hate this time in the early morning hours.  There are a few people here, but none of my "regular" buddies.  I'm not interested in making new friendships.  But then I see Megan's (moderator) name and I feel a little bit better.  Just a touch of comfort and I want to say thank you to all the moderators.

 

First you say you have early morning tears and then you spew  you're not interested in making new buddies ( that statement just makes you sound like a total bitch ) I really hope there are not too many people on here with your disgusting attitude

[[Be...]]

well, I can show you one Bechlin.... look in a mirror..

ps. Im reporting this, this takes the cake on here so far that Ive seen....

[[Be...]]

well, I can show you one Bechlin.... look in a mirror..

ps. Im reporting this, this takes the cake on here so far that Ive seen....

You wanna report me for being honest ? Ok go ahead I don't care , I have other things to worry about

[[Be...]]

FYI, I know Rex from interacting with her a lot on the Xanax thread, shes having a very hard time currently, and what she meant was that she just doesnt have it in here to make any more friends at this point than she already has, she just doesnt have anything more to give anyone else right now.....

but regardlss if that wasnt the case, if she doesnt want to make friends, that doesn't make it right at all for you to say such on here...

what did your comment have to do with the threads topic....

[[IG...]]

I hate this time in the early morning hours.  There are a few people here, but none of my "regular" buddies.  I'm not interested in making new friendships.  But then I see Megan's (moderator) name and I feel a little bit better.  Just a touch of comfort and I want to say thank you to all the moderators.

 

First you say you have early morning tears and then you spew  you're not interested in making new buddies ( that statement just makes you sound like a total bitch ) I really hope there are not too many people on here with your disgusting attitude

 

Bechlin,

 

    This is totally inappropriate, this being the first thread I came on here and read this morning and once again someone seeking help is being abused and called names makes me Sick..if you don't have something nice to say.  Move On

 

Molly

[[ma...]]

First you say you have early morning tears and then you spew  you're not interested in making new buddies ( that statement just makes you sound like a total bitch ) I really hope there are not too many people on here with your disgusting attitude

 

Bechlin! Your comments here are out of order and not welcome here on the forum.  We do not tolerate attacks on members, please refrain from posting these types of abrasive and uncaring remarks

 

 

•Be polite towards, and respectful of, your fellow Buddies. We do not tolerate attacks upon fellow members.

 

 

Rules and guidelines:

 

Magrita

 

[[ba...]]

Well, I did get a solid 4 last night and I do feel better.

 

Bechlin,

 

Wow!  Where did that come from?  Benzy is right.  I'm sick and I don't want extra communication with people right now.  Simple as that.

 

Thank you Benzy, Molly and Magrita.  I do feel better after a little sleep.

[[al...]]

I retreated from everyone during the worse times of my w/d. I ignored my friends, didn't pick up the phone, nothing. I just had no energy to give and did not want anyone to see me like that. I had no energy to be anything but miserable and in pain. I could't fake it, it took too much energy and I didn;t want to be a downer every time i saw my friends. Forget about making new friends, that was never going to happen, I had zero energy to even feed myself let alone make nice with a new person. 

 

The good news is, that once you feel like seeing people again and talking to people and interacting again, you will know you are on your way to being healed. The first time you laugh again, for no other reason but that something is genuinely funny. Man, that is one hell of a good day! You'll get there. I promise!

 

Just disregard negative comments, you never know where they are coming from. The person could be having a rough day themselves and projecting it on to you or taking it out on you. Try not to take it personally. I know I was pretty nasty to my husband on some days, poor guy. I really didn;t mean it, I just had to express my anger somehow and unfortunately he was often the recipient.  But he was strong and could take it,. Someone going through a rough time themselves can't brush it off. It's too hard.  And it's so easy to say unkind things to strangers online because it's anonymous. Try not to take it to heart.

 

Alabama.xo

[[fa...]]

Baby Rex, Yes we had storms as well yesterday...and for some reason I looked out to see that my farm was awash in a soft white misty light. And for those short few moments I forgot all of the pain and felt calm. Glad you shared it with me.

 

Bechlin, When I first read the OP, I felt the same way.  I thought about it awhile and then understood where Baby Rex was coming from.  I do not post to make friends...I post to offer support and a kind word.  I wanted to ask why there are some BBs that only want to respond to certain others, but then why should I care? I want to be kind to all on here, no matter how they feel or what words they use...it is only words...because that is why I joined.

 

We are all wearing different shoes on different paths but the goal is the same. 

[[ba...]]

I retreated from everyone during the worse times of my w/d. I ignored my friends, didn't pick up the phone, nothing. I just had no energy to give and did not want anyone to see me like that. I had no energy to be anything but miserable and in pain. I could't fake it, it took too much energy and I didn;t want to be a downer every time i saw my friends. Forget about making new friends, that was never going to happen, I had zero energy to even feed myself let alone make nice with a new person. 

 

The good news is, that once you feel like seeing people again and talking to people and interacting again, you will know you are on your way to being healed. The first time you laugh again, for no other reason but that something is genuinely funny. Man, that is one hell of a good day! You'll get there. I promise!

 

Just disregard negative comments, you never know where they are coming from. The person could be having a rough day themselves and projecting it on to you or taking it out on you. Try not to take it personally. I know I was pretty nasty to my husband on some days, poor guy. I really didn;t mean it, I just had to express my anger somehow and unfortunately he was often the recipient.  But he was strong and could take it,. Someone going through a rough time themselves can't brush it off. It's too hard.  And it's so easy to say unkind things to strangers online because it's anonymous. Try not to take it to heart.

 

Alabama.xo

 

alabama,

 

Thank you for your kind words!  I lashed out at you once and you took it well.  You've summed up exactly what I and many others are going through.  I refuse to answer the phone, I have no interaction with my old dear friends, and I can't leave the house.  It's a prison we are forced to live in, and this has much to do with our anger and despair.  I'm glad you are sharing your healing, it's nice to hear such positive news. 

 

[[ba...]]

Baby Rex, Yes we had storms as well yesterday...and for some reason I looked out to see that my farm was awash in a soft white misty light. And for those short few moments I forgot all of the pain and felt calm. Glad you shared it with me.

 

Bechlin, When I first read the OP, I felt the same way.  I thought about it awhile and then understood where Baby Rex was coming from.  I do not post to make friends...I post to offer support and a kind word.  I wanted to ask why there are some BBs that only want to respond to certain others, but then why should I care? I want to be kind to all on here, no matter how they feel or what words they use...it is only words...because that is why I joined.

 

We are all wearing different shoes on different paths but the goal is the same. 

 

fan,

 

The moon is a spotlight yet again this evening.  It's absolutely beautiful in the scrubbed clean skies.  Thank you for taking the time to show me there is more than just the instant we are living in now.

 

 

 

 

[[Ch...]]

Baby Rex, Yes we had storms as well yesterday...and for some reason I looked out to see that my farm was awash in a soft white misty light. And for those short few moments I forgot all of the pain and felt calm. Glad you shared it with me.

 

Bechlin, When I first read the OP, I felt the same way.  I thought about it awhile and then understood where Baby Rex was coming from.  I do not post to make friends...I post to offer support and a kind word.  I wanted to ask why there are some BBs that only want to respond to certain others, but then why should I care? I want to be kind to all on here, no matter how they feel or what words they use...it is only words...because that is why I joined.

 

We are all wearing different shoes on different paths but the goal is the same. 

 

fan,

 

The moon is a spotlight yet again this evening.  It's absolutely beautiful in the scrubbed clean skies.  Thank you for taking the time to show me there is more than just the instant we are living in now.

 

 

 

  I love this post.

[[Pi...]]

Babyrex, I am sorry u have early morning tears! I know exactly what u are referring to. I don't answer my ph either . Or the front door. I have become the proverbial hermit! Night time is hard. It's so lonely. Before I found BBs I felt totally isolated. This forum is a life jacket to me.

      I really hope that u do well baby. Xanax is the devil drug! I was on that for 6 yrs. I tried so so hard to get off it. I didn't know any thing about benzos.

    I am in absolute admiration of anyone who can taper off it!

              I just wanted to be encouraging to u.            Big hug.    Pinkee

[[ba...]]

Baby Rex, Yes we had storms as well yesterday...and for some reason I looked out to see that my farm was awash in a soft white misty light. And for those short few moments I forgot all of the pain and felt calm. Glad you shared it with me.

 

Bechlin, When I first read the OP, I felt the same way.  I thought about it awhile and then understood where Baby Rex was coming from.  I do not post to make friends...I post to offer support and a kind word.  I wanted to ask why there are some BBs that only want to respond to certain others, but then why should I care? I want to be kind to all on here, no matter how they feel or what words they use...it is only words...because that is why I joined.

 

We are all wearing different shoes on different paths but the goal is the same. 

 

fan,

 

The moon is a spotlight yet again this evening.  It's absolutely beautiful in the scrubbed clean skies.  Thank you for taking the time to show me there is more than just the instant we are living in now.

 

 

 

  I love this post.

 

Challis,

 

I'm glad you are back.  You were honest about how bad the end can be and for that I am grateful.  I know not everyone experiences a tough ending, but it's good to know you can go through this hell and still heal.

 

 

 

 

 

[[al...]]

alabama,

 

Thank you for your kind words!  I lashed out at you once and you took it well.  You've summed up exactly what I and many others are going through.  I refuse to answer the phone, I have no interaction with my old dear friends, and I can't leave the house.  It's a prison we are forced to live in, and this has much to do with our anger and despair.  I'm glad you are sharing your healing, it's nice to hear such positive news. 

 

Oh hun, I  don't even remember you lashing out at me, honestly I really don't, please don't worry about it. And I am sure I have in my crappy moments lashed out at a few as well.. although i don't remember that either LOL  . Good ol' benzo brain at it's best! Now I wish I could just remember where I put my keys ! LOL!

 

Alabama.xo