Bad Depression

[[dr...]]

I am depressed everyday, some days are worse than others. I am in bed 90% of the time from this w/d syndrome and I just feel hopeless and awful. I have the darkest nightmares and intrusive thoughts. I am working through it as best I can. I was really happy prior to this so my question is, do I have to DO anything about it? My understanding is that it will just lift on its own as I heal, but it feels so permanent. If I return to my prior state of mind then I wouldn't be depressed, so my thinking is that I just have to wait. For those of you who have done it does it just lift after enough time or will this change me for good?

[[Pa...]]

It goes away when you heal, if you weren't like this before, then you won't be after.  You can do things to help yourself though, and staying in bed isn't one of them.  I stayed busy, it was easy because the inner trembling kept me so agitated I had to move.  But I was able to accomplish projects and tasks and even though I still felt things, I had a small sense of satisfaction.  Distraction is key to getting through this.

[[sh...]]

Distraction is key to getting through this.

 

That is one of the reasons why I started posting on the forums. I can sit here for hours, talk with people and the day coasts by. If you can, get up out of bed and get on the computer. Watch a movie or tv show; anything that keeps your mind occupied. I know it's easier to lay in bed and sink deeper with the depression. I've been there and might be there again, but we have to change our habits or we'll only feel worse. I hope it lifts you, as no one should ever feel this way.

[[dr...]]

I spend most of my day on the forums. I notice when I'm in a window I can focus on tv or a game or something. I think I am just in the earlier days and it's gonna be like this for awhile. I hate every morning though. Everything kicks up and I think about nothing but negative stuff. I think about every single aspect of my life and how bad it is. It's horrible. I have never felt like this in my life. I have been mildly depressed when I had some chronic pain for awhile but nothing to this level.

[[Pa...]]

It sounds like you're dealing with the morning anxiety which is really common, you might try looking at this link to get some ideas how to get yourself out of it.  http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=33198.0 It also sounds like you're having intrusive thoughts, another common symptom.  http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/bzcha03.htm#6