Completed Mirtazapine Taper!

[[op...]]

Friends,

This is just a note to let y'all know that I am officially clean of all meds. I thought this day would never come. What started as a short-term and super low dose stint on benzos turned into a three-year nightmare of illness. From start to finish, my taper was 2 1/4 years: 1 year to get off 4mg of valium, and another 1 1/4 years to get off the mirtazapine I took to help with the akathisia & other hellish w/d sxs. I feel a mix of relief and grief, but mainly i hope to never see a compounded liquid or drug scale again!

I am about 85% percent better. I will maybe write a success story when I feel a little closer to the 90-95% range. But what I do want to share with folks who are just starting this path is that:

1 - you will get better!

2 - it will take time, and it may suck, and if you can find one useful thing to do with that time, whatever that may be, do it!

3 - it is hard hard work to do a slow and precise taper, but for me, it was worth it. I tapered down to the last dregs of both drugs (.05mg of each) and then basically walked off at the end. No jumping and no surprises that way.

I am BEYOND grateful this site was here to support my journey (though a bit sad the mirtazapine support group was disbanded during the relaunch, as those folks were tremendous supports to me - if you see this, thank you!)

I am deeply grateful to @[Pa...] for holding me up in the early days when I didn't think I could go on another day.

I'm here on the other side, y'all! I even completed a graduate degree during this nonsense, while living completely alone in a brand new city, and dealing with a randomly totaled car mid-taper! You got this!

If I can support anyone else in any way, please let me know. I don't come around as much as I used to but i will always answer messages or tags as best as I am able.

I'll post a followup again in six months or so.

xo open road

 

[[...]]

@[op...]! Just great! My Congratulations and Thanks for the post.🤩!  And separate congrats on you.completing a degree among all this mess, cool!) I'll never get tired of reading smth like this)

I'm off benzo and tapering off mirt too. What was the full mirt dose which you started getting off? One and a quarter of a year is quite a while I seem to be doing too fast.

Edited April 8 by [...]

[[Ct...]]

Congratulations @[op...]! Tapering off Valium and Mirtazapine is quite an accomplishment. Completing your degree during the process is incredible. 

[[Re...]]

13 hours ago, [[o...] said:

Friends,

This is just a note to let y'all know that I am officially clean of all meds. I thought this day would never come. What started as a short-term and super low dose stint on benzos turned into a three-year nightmare of illness. From start to finish, my taper was 2 1/4 years: 1 year to get off 4mg of valium, and another 1 1/4 years to get off the mirtazapine I took to help with the akathisia & other hellish w/d sxs. I feel a mix of relief and grief, but mainly i hope to never see a compounded liquid or drug scale again!

I am about 85% percent better. I will maybe write a success story when I feel a little closer to the 90-95% range. But what I do want to share with folks who are just starting this path is that:

1 - you will get better!

2 - it will take time, and it may suck, and if you can find one useful thing to do with that time, whatever that may be, do it!

3 - it is hard hard work to do a slow and precise taper, but for me, it was worth it. I tapered down to the last dregs of both drugs (.05mg of each) and then basically walked off at the end. No jumping and no surprises that way.

I am BEYOND grateful this site was here to support my journey (though a bit sad the mirtazapine support group was disbanded during the relaunch, as those folks were tremendous supports to me - if you see this, thank you!)

I am deeply grateful to @[Pa...] for holding me up in the early days when I didn't think I could go on another day.

I'm here on the other side, y'all! I even completed a graduate degree during this nonsense, while living completely alone in a brand new city, and dealing with a randomly totaled car mid-taper! You got this!

If I can support anyone else in any way, please let me know. I don't come around as much as I used to but i will always answer messages or tags as best as I am able.

I'll post a followup again in six months or so.

xo open road

@[op...] Congrats on persevering for so many years and closing the chapter on psych meds. Like you, I never want to see another compounded liquid again!! It makes me gag just to think about it. How long have you been off now? Can you tell us in greater detail what the healing process was like for you? I am so happy that you are 85 percent better. Thank you for starting my week off right with your story.

[[ns...]]

18 hours ago, [[o...] said:

Friends,

This is just a note to let y'all know that I am officially clean of all meds. I thought this day would never come. What started as a short-term and super low dose stint on benzos turned into a three-year nightmare of illness. From start to finish, my taper was 2 1/4 years: 1 year to get off 4mg of valium, and another 1 1/4 years to get off the mirtazapine I took to help with the akathisia & other hellish w/d sxs. I feel a mix of relief and grief, but mainly i hope to never see a compounded liquid or drug scale again!

I am about 85% percent better. I will maybe write a success story when I feel a little closer to the 90-95% range. But what I do want to share with folks who are just starting this path is that:

1 - you will get better!

2 - it will take time, and it may suck, and if you can find one useful thing to do with that time, whatever that may be, do it!

3 - it is hard hard work to do a slow and precise taper, but for me, it was worth it. I tapered down to the last dregs of both drugs (.05mg of each) and then basically walked off at the end. No jumping and no surprises that way.

I am BEYOND grateful this site was here to support my journey (though a bit sad the mirtazapine support group was disbanded during the relaunch, as those folks were tremendous supports to me - if you see this, thank you!)

I am deeply grateful to @[Pa...] for holding me up in the early days when I didn't think I could go on another day.

I'm here on the other side, y'all! I even completed a graduate degree during this nonsense, while living completely alone in a brand new city, and dealing with a randomly totaled car mid-taper! You got this!

If I can support anyone else in any way, please let me know. I don't come around as much as I used to but i will always answer messages or tags as best as I am able.

I'll post a followup again in six months or so.

xo open road

Thank you so much for sharing your story of freedom!

Congratulations openroad! So happy for you!

You give us hope fie sure!

Ns

[[ca...]]

Congratulations, all the best for you. I hope to be in the spot one day too. 

[[op...]]

[[op...]]

21 hours ago, [[c...] said:

Congratulations, all the best for you. I hope to be in the spot one day too. 

you will!!

[[op...]]

On 08/04/2024 at 05:50, [[C...] said:

Congratulations @[op...]! Tapering off Valium and Mirtazapine is quite an accomplishment. Completing your degree during the process is incredible. 

Thank you! I saw your DM and will reply soon

[[op...]]

22 hours ago, [[n...] said:

Thank you so much for sharing your story of freedom!

Congratulations openroad! So happy for you!

You give us hope fie sure!

Ns

you got this!!

[[op...]]

On 08/04/2024 at 11:15, [[R...] said:

@[op...] Congrats on persevering for so many years and closing the chapter on psych meds. Like you, I never want to see another compounded liquid again!! It makes me gag just to think about it. How long have you been off now? Can you tell us in greater detail what the healing process was like for you? I am so happy that you are 85 percent better. Thank you for starting my week off right with your story.

Hi rebecca!

It's been a long story that I will share more completely one day, but essentially I was sick for a long time and saw nearly 10 specialists before I figured out (through Reddit, of all places!) that it was the benzos that were making me sick. I had been going off and on and off of them because my main sxs were intractable nausea, terror, heart palpitations, and pacing - which I now realize were a combination of w/d (when I initially quit benzos) and then tolerance w/d (when I started up again). When it was suggested to me that the benzos might be the problem, I c/t'd and almost wound up in the hospital. I was down to 80 pounds at one point and couldn't even eat a piece of toast. It was an excruciatingly long journey, but healing does happen. Over time, the jitters, the pacing, the crashes, the chemical fear ... it all slowly dissipated. Now, my two main sxs are head buzzing in the morning and abdominal distension, which both come and go. I am holding out faith for a full(ish) recovery but I know it all takes time. I hope this is helpful and please keep us posted on your victories, too. 

open road

[[Re...]]

4 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

Hi rebecca!

It's been a long story that I will share more completely one day, but essentially I was sick for a long time and saw nearly 10 specialists before I figured out (through Reddit, of all places!) that it was the benzos that were making me sick. I had been going off and on and off of them because my main sxs were intractable nausea, terror, heart palpitations, and pacing - which I now realize were a combination of w/d (when I initially quit benzos) and then tolerance w/d (when I started up again). When it was suggested to me that the benzos might be the problem, I c/t'd and almost wound up in the hospital. I was down to 80 pounds at one point and couldn't even eat a piece of toast. It was an excruciatingly long journey, but healing does happen. Over time, the jitters, the pacing, the crashes, the chemical fear ... it all slowly dissipated. Now, my two main sxs are head buzzing in the morning and abdominal distension, which both come and go. I am holding out faith for a full(ish) recovery but I know it all takes time. I hope this is helpful and please keep us posted on your victories, too. 

open road

How long have you been off now? This sounds like incredible progress. 

[[...]]

53 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

Hi Kate! I started at 7.5mg when I was in acute from benzo w/d (a doctor suggested I take 45mg, which was insane - I weigh 100 pounds!) You can see my taper history in my profile - I documented it very specifically. I cut to half within a month or so and then it took a LONG time to taper the rest b/c  was tapering the benzo at the same time. I didn't really have waves and windows while tapering benzos. I had "feeling generally crappy but functional" and "crashing hard". When I would have a "crash," I would re-experience the aka, vomiting/nausea, and chemical terror. So, a couple of times when I crashed, I would go back up a drop on the mirt. When I would balance out, I would restart my taper. Last August, I got Covid. I had been doing well and completely off benzos and almost off the mirt, and then suddenly I was having a massive "crash". So I went back up to 3.5 mirt, and then tapered back down again. It was a LONG road for me. I think the important thing is to listen to your body. If you feel ok as you are tapering, then you aren't going too fast. Remember that there is no one leading the charge here on research around any of this. We are on our own, and need to go at our own pace. Good luck on the rest of your taper!

Thank you so much for the answer, @[op...] It's very useful for me. My full dose was lots bigger and i've cut it in a bit more than 4 times for 3 months. Think i'll take my time now close to the end. I'm just confused what is what. I mean benzo wd symptoms and mirt wd symptoms)

Good luck to you!) I'm glad you're out of it. Be happy with your renewed life

[[Ho...]]

Hey @[op...], props to you you did it!!! And helped people like me along the way. I'm still tapering my mirt; am on .4 mg and dropping by a mere .025 a week, but it seems to be working okay.

May you soon be 100%!!

HC

[[op...]]

1 hour ago, [[H...] said:

Hey @[op...], props to you you did it!!! And helped people like me along the way. I'm still tapering my mirt; am on .4 mg and dropping by a mere .025 a week, but it seems to be working okay.

May you soon be 100%!!

HC

HC - Great to hear from you! Wow - .4mg! I went all the way down to .05. It was basically air at the end. Keep me posted. "Working okay" is what we want!

open road

[[op...]]

[[op...]]

8 hours ago, [[R...] said:

How long have you been off now? This sounds like incredible progress. 

Off benzos since Jan 2023. Just walked off mirt last weekend. The days went by slow, as they say, but the years flew ... 

[[Re...]]

4 minutes ago, [[o...] said:

Off benzos since Jan 2023. Just walked off mirt last weekend. The days went by slow, as they say, but the years flew ... 

I look forward to continuing to hear about your progress. Thank you for the additional details.

[[Gi...]]

On 10/04/2024 at 07:18, [[o...] said:

Off benzos since Jan 2023. Just walked off mirt last weekend. The days went by slow, as they say, but the years flew ... 

Hi Openroad, congratulations on your progress. I read through a thread where you mentioned that you experienced abdominal jerks whilst sitting.

Did this symptom go away for you at all if you don’t mind me asking? 
 

I’m a 14 months out and I still have this symptom. It’s awful.

Thank you for any hope.

[[op...]]

On 08/05/2024 at 02:38, [[G...] said:

Hi Openroad, congratulations on your progress. I read through a thread where you mentioned that you experienced abdominal jerks whilst sitting.

Did this symptom go away for you at all if you don’t mind me asking? 
 

I’m a 14 months out and I still have this symptom. It’s awful.

Thank you for any hope.

Hi @[Gi...] -

Sorry you are dealing with this! I did not have abdominal jerks. I had severe abdominal distention and bloating, and was never quite sure if it was from the diazepam or mirtazapine withdrawal, or probably both. It was extreme and painful and has improved tremendously over time and with the help of some alternative and herbal treatments like DAO, acupuncture, and cupping. These issues with our abdomen can be quite severe for some of us, and I believe it has to do with the dysregulation of our gaba and our parasympathetic nervous system a.k.a. the rest and digest aspect of our autonomic nervous system, which is completely disrupted by withdrawal. I do think it will go away eventually. I hope this is helpful, and let me know if I can help in any other way.

Edited May 11 by [op...]

[[Le...]]

On 07/04/2024 at 23:50, [[o...] said:

Friends,

This is just a note to let y'all know that I am officially clean of all meds. I thought this day would never come. What started as a short-term and super low dose stint on benzos turned into a three-year nightmare of illness. From start to finish, my taper was 2 1/4 years: 1 year to get off 4mg of valium, and another 1 1/4 years to get off the mirtazapine I took to help with the akathisia & other hellish w/d sxs. I feel a mix of relief and grief, but mainly i hope to never see a compounded liquid or drug scale again!

I am about 85% percent better. I will maybe write a success story when I feel a little closer to the 90-95% range. But what I do want to share with folks who are just starting this path is that:

1 - you will get better!

2 - it will take time, and it may suck, and if you can find one useful thing to do with that time, whatever that may be, do it!

3 - it is hard hard work to do a slow and precise taper, but for me, it was worth it. I tapered down to the last dregs of both drugs (.05mg of each) and then basically walked off at the end. No jumping and no surprises that way.

I am BEYOND grateful this site was here to support my journey (though a bit sad the mirtazapine support group was disbanded during the relaunch, as those folks were tremendous supports to me - if you see this, thank you!)

I am deeply grateful to @[Pa...] for holding me up in the early days when I didn't think I could go on another day.

I'm here on the other side, y'all! I even completed a graduate degree during this nonsense, while living completely alone in a brand new city, and dealing with a randomly totaled car mid-taper! You got this!

If I can support anyone else in any way, please let me know. I don't come around as much as I used to but i will always answer messages or tags as best as I am able.

I'll post a followup again in six months or so.

xo open road

Very happy for you. Thats a great place to be.