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Stuck in a cycle


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Can't seem to break out of this depression for any period of time, will have a window here and there where I actually feel like cleaning the house and working out and dressing up to be presentable, but for the last week I haven't taken but one shower, have not gotten out of my pj's expect when I have to come to work and it seems to be getting worse. I am on a/d (prozac) and also take trazadone to help me sleep. I am starting to think that these are causing some of the problem, and that I should stop taking them. Would like to hear from others having this problem or solutions to this problem. Thanks Karen                                     
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Hi, brushy.

 

As you know, both the drugs you are on are anti-depressants so I doubt they are causing your depression.  When I was first tried on Prozac (20omg), it took over 3 months to finally reach a therapeutic dose for me (60mg).  During those months I had to go to work every day, like you do, and it was hard on the weekends to work up any energy to do anything else.  I made very small goals for myself that I thought would make me feel better - like taking a shower and getting dressed - and just kept putting one foot in front of the other as best I could.  Sorry I don't have anything else to offer.  :-\  Hope you feel better soon.

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hi brushie - i totally relate to all you said.  depression is the worst - i'd rather have this insane anxiety than that.  prozac made me worse as do all the ssri's  i  do better on ad's that work with noepinephrin than serotonin.  i don't know if it is the meds but it certainly could be.  i have many friends who do great on lexapro.  i take wellbutrin.  75-150 mg.  it gives people energy i guess - can add o the HBP and stress feeliing.  trazidone did not work for me so i stay up til 3-4 am still.  won't work when job starts & i gt up at 5:30  xpxp
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Having a hard time understanding why anybody on this forum would suggest using anti-depressants.  There is enough info out there that shows undeniable evidence they cause depression and suicidal ideation.  They are no better than benzos.  Life is sucky enough without getting chemical help to make it worse - isn't that why people are on this forum in the first place?
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ADs made me depressed and lethargic.  That was my experience.  They experimented around with different ones-  Wellbutrin made me so constipated I couldn't go for a month.  Lexapro was very sedating, couldn't stay awake.  Prozac gave me night sweats and worse depression.  Paxil and Effexor made me comatose.  They tried Zoloft too, forgot what happened with that one.  They always ended up putting me back on Prozac, don't understand their reasoning but did what they told me.  So glad I finally woke up.
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I've had bouts of clinical depression twice in my life.

 

The first time I had it was the result of abusing street drugs (ecstasy) for several years which depleted my serotonin terribly. I was suicidal and absolutely desperate. Celexa saved my life-- it really did.

 

Subsequently, I had doctors try to switch me first to Wellbutrin and then Effexor (both made me feel like I was on speed). I did not like either, so I stayed on the Celexa. I guess that I was lazy about trying to get off of Celexa, because I had other health problems pop up like lupus, fibromyalgia and severe pneumonia, and I wasn't healthy enough at the time to think of coming off of it.

 

I was prescribed klonopin for sleep problems caused by the fibromyalgia. Once I got my fibro under control, I decided to try to come off of the klonopin.

 

The second bout of depression that I have had in my life has been from coming off this klonopin/crossed-over valium.  It has been the nastiest, darkest place. Once again, I found myself desperate. My doctor this time put me on Remeron, and it has helped a ton with the anxiety and burning in my nerves, etc. I can still feel the depression, but I am able to function.

 

I am not an advocate of antidepressants. This has just been my life experience. I would not have gone on them either time if I did not feel that my life was at risk.

 

I do, however, think that it is dangerous to preach in favor of or against antidepressants on a forum such as this. Many people on these boards are in a desperate place; Ashton lists suicide as a danger in benzo withdrawal, so we ought not to discourage people going on an antidepressant if they feel they are at risk.

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I was on Prozac once long ago...I was the Energizer Bunny. I was constantly on edge. I could not shut up and finally...when I began to act out, then I knew something was wrong. I had reached a point where I had gone to far. This was years ago...I was in my twenties. I don't remember much other than how I was indiscriminate, licentious, and far to touch and feely. I lost the ability to form good judgements...so much so that I did regretable things to women. I c/t Prozac but I don't remember any w/d or sx.

 

Paxil...it destroyed me on every level. It did not help with my depression; in fact from what I can remember...I continued to be depressed while on Paxil, moreso than normal. I was in this constant fog and as they increased the dosage...I began to change from my former mild mannered self that I was...into a horrible, horrible uncaring person...on every level you can possible think of. I hurt people and I damaged my good character and prominence beyond ever repairing or fixing. I was numb to everything in this world. When I went c/t from Paxil and Clonazepam...and even though there were w/d sx...for a short time I felt like I was alive again. When I had to reinstate Clonazepam...not realizing that I was actually in the throes of w/d...depression slowly made its way back, and from then on in...it has always been this unfathomable dark place. Lately it hits harder and far worse than it ever has, as I continue to taper. I've been crying for about 4 days straight now...sometimes uncontrollably and sometimes just tears of sorrow and regret.

 

I don't ever want to touch these chemicals again. I am convinced these meds and I do not mix well. They have not healed me...only made things worse. Literally...they open up a Pandora's Box of problems once I take them long enough. There has to be something other than these pills, whether SSRI or benzo's, to help people like us. These meds do not offer healing or hope.  Seriously, look at how we all now struggle to get off them...just to be whole and functional. They are bandages, slapped on  haphazardly. I am sure some people can accept that, some do need them to make it day by day...but after what I have been through with these meds...no thanks. I would not recommend them to anyone.

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hi Brushie !

just to let you know : you are not alone, I m feeling trapped in a depressive cycle too. It is v hard. Maybe your dose of AD is too high ? you see it is the never ended question : do AD can help us feeling better, or are they worsening our case - especially by making us feeling so tired. So if we don t have energy, most of the doctors will tell you that it s because you are depressed ; but it could be the other way round. For how long have you been on AD ? have you been on it before ? have you consider the possibility of menopause (or pre/ m) causing you trouble, because it is a major shift for both body and mind ?

Try to check on line the side effects of the med. you are on, see if they can cause sluggishness

it is a v good sign that you re still able to go to work

try to get as much support as you can from family and friends

take good care

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