Trying to live a more normal life at 6,5 years out

[[...]]

Hi Buddies,

I haven't been around in a while, and I thought I drop a little post here to say hi.

I am sorry this forum and group are still going so strong, it is just horrible the suffering these drugs cause... 

For those of you who recognize my screen name, I was active a few years back during my taper and when the gates of Hell broke loose when I jumped. I think back then, I hadn't realized how 'far gone' I was with my multiple-year-long mental acute (monophobia OMG !!!), as a means to survive this thing, I downplayed how ill and unwell I was.

Now at 6,5 years off all medication, I am far from well and light-years away from any level of 'healed', but I have come a VERY long way. In the past year, I have moved into my own apartment, adopted the most loving cat (I can feel something for her, no doubt there) and in April I even started working as a health and nutrition coach, so launching my own business. Life is nothing like it used to be in the first few years when it was all about surviving hellish symptoms. I won't go into details about that, I guess if you want to read about those years, you can search in the archives   

Here are some of the main symptoms I dealing with now :

- Very poor 'motivation' (I have learned to 'function' with will-power)

- Anhedonia 

- Intrusive thoughts

- Akathisia : still can't read fiction or watch fiction on Netflix if I am not doing something else at the same time

- Can't sleep on my back

- In a wave (on and off from day to day) : head pressure, body stiffness and spinning head 'from the back of my skull'

Having put those symptoms out there, it is yet as always about distraction from symptoms with other projects, focusing on helping others rather than on our own suffering... and just moving forward with things that are in the realm of our control. 

Love and light to you all,

Julia

[[Na...]]

Those symptoms sound all too familiar.

Sorry you're still dealing with this but it's great that you can see progress. Hopefully that will continue and speed up and you can soon put this behind you.

 

 

[[Th...]]

Thanks Julz. It's good to see your post.

[[...]]

On 21/01/2024 at 21:40, [[N...] said:

Those symptoms sound all too familiar.

Sorry you're still dealing with this but it's great that you can see progress. Hopefully that will continue and speed up and you can soon put this behind you.

Thank you very much for your kind words of support, Nathan, and for everything that you so around here 🙏

I am very sorry it is such a long hellish road for you too, but I'm a firm believer in seeing what positive can shine through even such amount of suffering, and from the bottom of my heart I wish you to feel 'better'. I guess you know what I am saying 😌

Julia 🌹

[[...]]

On 22/01/2024 at 19:22, [[T...] said:

Thanks Julz. It's good to see your post.

Thank you very much for your words, Girl, I wish you to see improvement and better things soon. In the meantime, hold on tight and take care 🙏

Love and Light,

Julia 🌹

[[Wi...]]

Hi Julz thank you so much for coming back to let us know how you are doing.

I have read some of your posts and had just been thinking how you are doing since the last post. It gives me hope that you can now live on your own again. That is something I find hard to believe that I can do again because I’m still too disabled to live alone. You’ve come so far!

Congratulations on your new kitty friend🥰 Cats are such healing companions. Wishing you all the best and may you see more and more healing! 

Edited January 26 by [Wi...]

[[Be...]]

Hi Julz.  I can certainly relate to your current symptoms.  Five years off for me (Xanax 15 years use, rapid taper over two months).  The head stuff is what is left for me.  The head pressure, the feeling "off", woozy, off balance, "spinning" head.  It's constant, pretty much.  All of the other symptoms (physical) have seemed to heal, my anxiety has improved greatly, Im left with the head / neuro stuff.   It's exhausting, no doubt.  I often think that this is what's left - forever.  It's disheartening but, I remain hopeful that one day I will wake and everything will be working like it should.  I hope the same for you. 

Congratulations on your new business journey!  

[[Be...]]

Hello, Nanny Julz.  I remember you.  I also have head pressure.