Oh boy here I go again

[[Pa...]]

You're almost there, you're done an amazing job, I hope your supplements keep working for you.

[[Bu...]]

Woke up at 3:00 am … again hah . Just wanted to thank the moderator(I think) who keeps responding to my posts

 

You’re a rockstar & I appreciate you

I am playing my guitar again, my uncle would be proud. I’m trying to get into practicing every day how I used to before I had children haha

As my sleepytime chamomile tea is cooling off : my symptoms today have been mild during the day but oddly enough an hour or two after I take my 1/16th (.125mg) I have this weird sleep sensitivity

 

The agmatine sulfate really has been a game changer for my taper

Despite the benefits I’m increasingly cloistered and quiet according to my lady, she notices everything

I’m gonna continue for a few weeks as so & maybe… try and just take speckles how I was doing at the beginning when my buddy got arrested and I couldn’t source any . What a nightmare that was compared to now.

 

These benzo blues will soon pass by & I hope that someone can read this experience report and begin or continue  their own healing journey.

 

Unrelated but, the news is horrible… i keep watching all this stuff on world war 3 kicking off and the idea of all the medicines coming from China suddenly stopping keeps me up at night. They own something like 90% of the precursors and manufacture almost all the medicines we as Americans use.

 

It is a scary thought alone having to have my family go through ww3 but the idea of millions of people being suddenly cut off because of medicine shortages is a thought I can’t shake…

I hope these thoughts are just paranoid delusions of a depressed dude

 

My tea is cool enough to sip now and the new cat is sitting on my chest.

Good night (hopefully) friends , sweet dreams to everyone

[[Pa...]]

Its good to hear music is back in your life, you must be feeling better but reading about the possible loss of critical medications has me worried. 

[[Bu...]]

Good news buddies , I’m on day (night now) #1 of no 1/16th ! So I didn’t take any at all last night 

 

Just took my entire supplement stack and fell asleep ! No nightmares recently, though I know those are a sign of healing as i’m getting deeper sleep. But no nightmares is tight, there was a few weeks ago every damn time I slept for more than a few hours it was some shitty shit my brain was conjuring jeez.

 

I’m excited for the next few weeks & will continue to update as I made the final jump last night & wanted to make sure I actually did it before posting

But here I am , slowly starting over

 

I’m hoping that anyone who reads this feels empowered to take the plunge and continue their tapers to the end of the mind-trials 🧠

Thanks again to you Buddy who responded to me every day you’re a hero I mean that

 

I am gonna make a note in my phone to practice my guitar tomorrow again while kids are at school

 

Adding to the last post, I keep saying I’m not going to read the news but my dumb internet algorithm always feeds me some news update then I get distracted and read some horrible things happening in the world.

 

One of those things that grabbed my attention is that there is an amphetamine shortage currently

And an amoxicillin shortage as well. Really scary stuff I especially worry about buddies who aren’t able to stop taking these medications for whatever reasons. I would caution anyone reading this to try and taper if you’re able, and if not, try to amass some sort of excess of your meds in case of a sudden supply chain disruption. Whether it be war, environmental disasters , economic collapse , or some weird accident like a boat crashing and blocking the Suez canal preventing precursor chemicals from making the journey to the chemical plants in East Asia.

 

I don’t want to worry anyone but I just believe it’s prudent albeit alarming to consider that there could be some sort of dire scenario coming .

 

To end on a positive note, I think that is highly unlikely & I am excited about finally being off and using the money i’m saving to invest into various stocks and precious metals  I wish everyone a wonderful spring! And I send you readers all my positive energy and encouragement! Much love to everyone

 

[[Pa...]]

Benzo free, congratulations!  I hope you follow through on playing your music, that sounds like a good reward for your accomplishment. 

 

Good advice about possible drug shortages, some members have reported them already, its scary to think people may have to cold turkey if they can't get their medication.

[[Bu...]]

Thanks again Buddy, you have been so wonderful helping me this entire time. I’m unsure where to move this thread , perhaps i’ll just start a new one in another appropriate board.

 

I’m on night 2, still going strong! Drank a bunch of kratom extract , too much in fact and i’m rather nauseous. Having some looping thoughts about the previously mentioned world events and my lady scared my eyeballs out my head while I was typing this message on my phone with my headphones in and turned around and she was grabbing chips in the kitchen . That NEVER used to happen to me but whatever it was funny after the initial shock 

*Edit: adding I definitely feel like quitting the benzos has me paranoid and looping and easily spooked. Even playing videogames (scary ones I used to love) is very stressful :/ oh well better to play an instrument*

 

I totally forgot to play guitar today cuz one of my kids was coughing all night and I didn’t get great sleep but really I never do anymore so its kind of an excuse . Tomorrow they’ll be better and will actually be at school . (they’re not coughing at all tonight not sending sick kids to school lol) but i’m not just rambling um I PROMISE I will practice guitar again tomorrow, I really enjoy Tarrega’s pieces & other classical and latin style songs & tomorrow when I post i’ll make sure to note what I did!

In fact :

making another reminder to myself to play .

 

Kinda feel confused today, bit foggy and its not the CBD or kava or kratom extracts . Feels like i’m filtering out the last of the xanax probably. But overall the supplements really helped and made this much more manageable

 

Feels like i’m typing in circles so i’ll leave that as it is.

As always, much love to everyone who is on their journey to healing. I’m going to get better soon friends and I hope you will too

[[Bu...]]

Hnnnnng, just got back from work, been going and doing chores all day, physically tired but mentally looping haha, I promised to practice guitar so I’m gonna keep my promise, after I finish this message I will grab my guitar and play a few songs slowly and softly

[[Pa...]]

Are you worried about becoming dependent on the kratom? 

 

If you'd like to engage with more members, you might want to start a thread on the Planning  Your Withdrawal (Taper), or you could jump into

Alternative  Therapies & Supplements to share some of your supplement recommendations.

[[Bu...]]

thanks buddy, I’m actually not worried at all about Kratom addiction, I used it to get off heroin years ago and it’s super easy to taper and non-lethal and has super mild side effects i’m well aware there are people online who eat ounces of the stuff but to be frank : that’s ridiculous and demonstrates a larger inability to self regulate any compounds at all. Kratom is much much better than synthetic opioids and benzodiazepines & has a wonderful dose range. I can take a couple concentrates and the next day I won’t need the same amount or more I am able to take a tablespoon of regular strength powder once every six hours

 

I practiced guitar a few minutes today, i’ll need to get some sheet music but I intend on keeping it up every day for the foreseeable future barring any craziness !

 

I have begun sharing my thoughts on the supplements forum but omce I’ve reached 2 months benzo free then I’ll definitely take the time to write a supplement review that can hopefully be helpful!

[[Pa...]]

You're providing me an education about kratom, I'm glad it's worked well for you.  You sound good, I'm glad you picked up the guitar.