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I am moving on.


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I work full time, I care for a sick child and I m doing my life.  I have  slow mild sx that I can live with.  I found joy.  I don’t know if this will be as good as it gets for me….but if it is I am okay.  I did not have windows or waves.  I am slowly getting better.  My biggest problem was the intrusive thoughts ocd and akathasia.    I still have them very mildly all the time.  Life goes on.  I wish I had some grand advice but I don’t.   

 

What I know is that sitting on forums watching myself and others suffer did nothing for me.  Not on here much at all anymore.  I don’t have any diseases was checked for every thing.  No MCA no heart problems no thyroid issues no hormone issues, it was the recovery from my ct.  I had every test.  I tried every diet. I tried a few supplements.  I have had no setbacks.  Nothing made me worse nothing helped either.  Once I accepted that this was temporary and just did my life with all my sx my mind somehow caught up. I don’t blame anyone but myself I went to the doctor and I took the pills.  I did no research before taking it.  My body my problem. 

 

Thanks to all who helped me along my journey.  As bad as I was and to even be alive today is a blessing. 

 

One thing I will say is thank you to myself for surviving this. 

 

I don’t think I will come back here again, it’s too much and I have to protect myself, but wanted to let you know where I am at.  It does get weirdly easier and that is all I know. 

 

Peace and prayers

 

Upperleft aka B

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Thank you for writing your story B, I've got tears streaming down my face right now, I'm so grateful you've found joy and you're able to care for your child.  You were so tortured but acceptance has and is playing a major role in your recovery.  The mind has so much power and I can see you were able to harness that power to reach the right mindset for you.

 

I'm so pleased you came back to tell your story, I wish you the best life has to offer.  :smitten:

 

Pamster

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Congratulations!! This is great news and I am so proud of you. God bless you and I surely will keep you and your daughter in my prayers!! :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

 

PG

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Hello B  It’s a wonderful story, thank you for posting.  It’s great to hear you are getting on with your life, well done you.  I hope life continues to get better for you.

 

Thanks again for coming back to let us know. Merry Christmas to you and your family.

 

Magrita :smitten:

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You are the epitome of success, thanks for sharing this strong and powerful message. I'm so happy for you and what you are able to do now in your life.

 

pianogirl  :smitten:

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  • 4 weeks later...

Upperleft,

 

Congratulations! It's so good to hear you have your life back.  Thanks for posting and giving encouragement to all of us. Enjoy. Hugs!

 

LiveLife

 

 

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  • 4 months later...
[Up...]

At the end of the day each person has to find their reason, their strength or their light at the end of the tunnel.  Each of us is responsible for our own survival.  I know it gets better because I am living it.  I am seeing it. 

 

The one thing I wish I could share with each of you is the will to live…unfortunately I can’t give you that.  It’s up to you to find your own!

 

Take care all I will check in some day….but if I don’t just know I am living my life.

 

U

 

 

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[Ga...]

I am so very happy for you, Upperleft, and thankful for your many wise and compassionate messages that you have supported me with over my 39 months of recovery.

 

I will keep you and your daughter in my warmest thoughts and prayers as you embark on and embrace a happier and healthier life.

 

Hugs,

 

GG

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[Co...]
Congratulations, Upperleft, and thank you for all you do here. Wishing you and your daughter well.
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[B ...]

Hey UL,

Glad you could write this success story my friend! You will help many others by being so positive and letting people know that it’s possible to get past the pain and try an live again. It’s not instantly perfect, but a journey to get back to a life worth living. Hope your daughter is doing better too!❤️

B strong

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[Sa...]

Congratulations on your success story.

 

Have the intrusive thoughts gone completely?

Do you get reminded of them sometimes or no. It’s amazing how our own brain can be our enemy during this phase

 

 

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[wo...]
Your story brings me a lot of hope. I hope to one day be as successful as you are. I too have not had any setbacks (yet), and no windows/waves either. I just am. This is encouraging to me as I feel that not having windows so far makes me "worse" than others.
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