how to live and enjoy life during this process?

[[ri...]]

I’ve been on 1mg of klonopin for 10 years, and I’ve had a couple of unsuccessful tapers where I reinstated. My identity has become caught up in the benzo. I view myself as sick and incapable of doing anything other than focusing on my symptoms. I’ve had enough of this, and want to take action and do meaningful things in fife. I realized my impatience caused me to taper too fast: 3 months for my first taper, and six and a half for the next one. I should have done at least a year long taper while engaging in life. What have you done to be able to actually live life through this process?

[[Pa...]]

Good for you for making a conscious decision to turn your thinking around, I have every confidence you can do whatever you set your mind to! 

 

The first thing I would suggest is to let go of your regret because I sense you're berating yourself and that won't do you any good.  You're on the right path now and that path includes forgiving and being kind to yourself.

 

Its very difficult to focus on anything other than our symptoms, you're not alone in this so please don't feel this is some sort of character defect, its just a part of this process. 

 

My best tool while going through this was distraction through projects, I can't say I enjoyed life but I did manage to find a sense of satisfaction which helped my confidence which as you know is pretty low during this.

 

What were your interests pre-benzo, did you have hobbies you enjoyed or do we need to find something new for you to engage in?

[[Ca...]]

Ridethrough and Pamster.. -a pair of mind readers..!! Two very important posts, imo..

 

Simply, Ridethrough, from that post I know you will find your freedom no matter how hard, or long it takes..!!

 

Pamster, Thank you..!! Spot on (imo) with the cautions and proactive suggestions..

-My interpretation, if I may..

 

1, Conscious Decision towards proactive thinking..

2, Let go the baggage.. -Head high, and look forward..

3, Recognise and understand the “Benzo (or med) lies”..

4, Use ones “tools”.. -The right tool or the right job, and at the right time..

5, hmmm.. -Accessorise..??, add the bling.. 

...And for those who’s “truck has a blown motor”, -dont worry, its in the shop getting a new rebuild and they are putting on a free supercharger..!!

 

So things I gravitated back to at my better times between various tapers..

-Gardening, my fruit trees and veggie gardens..

-Camping trips, beach and bush..

-Dirt bikes (for a while post valium)..

-The social from eating lunch at a nice healthy family run caffe while out..

 

And just recently, I woke one morning and felt like getting out.. So I took the dog 4x4 Off-roading and found a whole world of social and adventure at the local tracks.. This has turned out to be quite a thing in so many ways and I aint letting go..!! While I did have to reach a certain neurochemistry healing point, -and my body is like WTF..??!!, the onflow effect is profound..!!

 

Still a ways to go, both tapering and with life restoration, but like you say Ridethrough, if I can do it feeling like this (or better), I dont really care how long it takes..!!