Spiritual Thoughts that Help You Cope with Benzos

[[Jo...]]

Spiritual thought for June 11, 2021

 

 

 

 

I believe God likes to surprise people with good things.  In fact… I’d go as far as to say what a friend told me.  He said God has 1000 things in each pocket..and can pick any one of them any time of any day… and give it to you.  God has used many such “surprises” to help me get this far during benzo use.  They rarely come as often as I’d like them to, and they are almost never what I would expect them to be… but they are always perfect.

 

 

Kindly,

j

[[Gl...]]

Spiritual thought for June 11, 2021

 

 

 

 

I believe God likes to surprise people with good things.  In fact… I’d go as far as to say what a friend told me.  He said God has 1000 things in each pocket..and can pick any one of them any time of any day… and give it to you.  God has used many such “surprises” to help me get this far during benzo use.  They rarely come as often as I’d like them to, and they are almost never what I would expect them to be… but they are always perfect.

 

 

Kindly,

j

 

Awesome, Jozsef!  God does surprise us with good things and yes, always perfect.  I love His surprises.

[[Jo...]]

I find hope in knowing that the reality of today... which I must accept in order to grow and relax enough to keep fighting... may not be the same reality as a week, or a month, or a year from now.  Accepting the reality of today... doesn't mean by doing so... things will never change.  Somehow... sometimes it seems that by surrendering to today's reality will make it permanent.  I wonder if that is a "benzo thing ?"  It's good to have a made up mind... and I realize the only way to have a made up mind is to accept the reality of today... and that by surrendering to it... I am not forfeiting anything in the future... but rather getting closer and closer to embracing it and receiving it.  This must be a part of living by my faith.  This must be a part of coping with benzos.

 

 

Kindly,

j

[[Gl...]]

I find hope in knowing that the reality of today... which I must accept in order to grow and relax enough to keep fighting... may not be the same reality as a week, or a month, or a year from now.  Accepting the reality of today... doesn't mean by doing so... things will never change.  Somehow... sometimes it seems that by surrendering to today's reality will make it permanent.  I wonder if that is a "benzo thing ?"  It's good to have a made up mind... and I realize the only way to have a made up mind is to accept the reality of today... and that by surrendering to it... I am not forfeiting anything in the future... but rather getting closer and closer to embracing it and receiving it.  This must be a part of living by my faith.  This must be a part of coping with benzos.

 

 

Kindly,

j

 

This is good wisdom, jj.  I've found it to be useful too.  Surrendering to the pain of the day and accepting it is easier than resisting it. Thank you!

 

Being grateful for little things (or big things) that I take for granted helps me a lot.  There's so much to be grateful for.  It's true

what begood's post said (in her thread), when we start writing down the things we're grateful for, our brain stays on the lookout, searching for more things to be grateful for.  Being grateful has been proven to increase happiness.

 

 

[[Jo...]]

I find hope in knowing that the reality of today... which I must accept in order to grow and relax enough to keep fighting... may not be the same reality as a week, or a month, or a year from now.  Accepting the reality of today... doesn't mean by doing so... things will never change.  Somehow... sometimes it seems that by surrendering to today's reality will make it permanent.  I wonder if that is a "benzo thing ?"  It's good to have a made up mind... and I realize the only way to have a made up mind is to accept the reality of today... and that by surrendering to it... I am not forfeiting anything in the future... but rather getting closer and closer to embracing it and receiving it.  This must be a part of living by my faith.  This must be a part of coping with benzos.

 

 

Kindly,

j

 

This is good wisdom, jj.  I've found it to be useful too.  Surrendering to the pain of the day and accepting it is easier than resisting it. Thank you!

 

Being grateful for little things (or big things) that I take for granted helps me a lot.  There's so much to be grateful for.  It's true

what begood's post said (in her thread), when we start writing down the things we're grateful for, our brain stays on the lookout, searching for more things to be grateful for.  Being grateful has been proven to increase happiness.

 

I sometimes say… “God… thank you for EVERYTHING.”  (n he knows all the stuff I mean plus it covers the things I forget to be thankful for.)

[[Jo...]]

Having a spiritual life helps me cope during benzo use… one reason being… is that the worse my suffering is… the more I don’t want that suffering to be in vain.  Believing that my suffering is not in vain… gives me a purpose… even while being in a seemingly (to many in this world) worthless state most of the time.  Knowing my suffering is not in vain also empowers me to carry the burdens of others instead of only carrying my own burden.  It frees me to try to love others or to try to learn to love others.  It makes the journey and the outcome both a reward.  It turns the worst of the “unseen” or “not understood” parts of human suffering into things that are more special and meaningful than even anything that is understood and can be seen. 

 

It helps me endure all the “torturing” and “lies” that bombard my mind on a minute by minute basis (for the last 12 years)  It makes sense out of it all.  Even the most painful aspects of this benzowithdrawal experience.  Faith gives me a sense of hope and purpose and a sense of some sort of worth even when I feel in my own understanding I have no worth or value.  It gives me a reason to want to keep trying even to the death.  It helps me and empowers me to want to live well (even in this futile condition) or “die trying.”  Without the existence of a spiritual realm… I would have given up a long time ago, and I would have died many times over.

 

I have been trying to get off benzos for 12 years.

 

 

Kindly,

j

[[Gl...]]

Having a spiritual life helps me cope during benzo use… one reason being… is that the worse my suffering is… the more I don’t want that suffering to be in vain.  Believing that my suffering is not in vain… gives me a purpose… even while being in a seemingly (to many in this world) worthless state most of the time.  Knowing my suffering is not in vain also empowers me to carry the burdens of others instead of only carrying my own burden.  It frees me to try to love others or to try to learn to love others.  It makes the journey and the outcome both a reward.  It turns the worst of the “unseen” or “not understood” parts of human suffering into things that are more special and meaningful than even anything that is understood and can be seen. 

 

It helps me endure all the “torturing” and “lies” that bombard my mind on a minute by minute basis (for the last 12 years)  It makes sense out of it all.  Even the most painful aspects of this benzowithdrawal experience.  Faith gives me a sense of hope and purpose and a sense of some sort of worth even when I feel in my own understanding I have no worth or value.  It gives me a reason to want to keep trying even to the death.  It helps me and empowers me to want to live well (even in this futile condition) or “die trying.”  Without the existence of a spiritual realm… I would have given up a long time ago, and I would have died many times over.

 

I have been trying to get off benzos for 12 years.

 

 

Kindly,

j

 

A big amen, jj.  You said is so well, and I agree with and can relate to what you said.  There's a purpose in all our suffering.  I was lost without that purpose, but now I see.

[[Jo...]]

Speaking only for myself… I have noticed it doesn’t matter what I hear, or what I “believe” or what people tell me or what I read or from which book I read it from… or any source of encouraging information… when I am in dire need of encouragement.  In order to be encouraged by the source of encouragement, I must believe it.

 

So if you find yourself listening to others who are trying to encourage you, or you are trying to encourage them… but neither you nor they are being encouraged… ask yourself two questions.

 

1.  Do I really believe what is being told to me ?

 

2.  Does that person really believe what is being told to them ?

 

 

We have “nothing to lose” by believing things (good things).  Whether or not we believe can affect what happens to us…. eventually.  It might not happen over night… but if we keep on believing in spite of the circumstances… this will greatly influence what happens both now and in the end.

 

So… has someone shared something that was supposed to encourage you lately… but for some reason… you were disappointed because what they wrote to you or said to you did not encourage you ?  Let me ask you one thing.  Did you or do you actually believe what was said is true ?  I could use a sacred text as an example here… but I won’t because that would be breaking my own rules for this thread.

 

Love is the only thing that has truly ever given me any real temporary or lasting comfort, peace… or healing on this journey.  I’ve discovered that for me and my benzo injuries… I have only ever been comforted by things I truly believe/believed were/are true.  The times (and there have been many) that my soul “refused to be comforted” were mostly times when I either believed or knew that the words someone was using to try to comfort me or encourage me were not true.  There is something about truth (anything that is not a lie) that communicates love regardless if it is exactly what I want to hear or not.

 

When someone tries to comfort me with lies or falsehood… it is vain to me any only causes my burden to grow more heavy.

 

Does intellect always need to rule our hearts (minds) ?  What have we lost by choosing hope.  Choosing to believe something good… regardless of the circumstances ?  Why is it… do we suppose sometimes we have faith about things, and other times we have zero faith about something else ?  What force was at work in our hearts during the times we chose to believe ?  What was the motivating factor ?

 

 

Kindly,

j

 

[[Tx...]]

“You could not remove a single grain of sand from its place without thereby … changing something throughout all parts of the immeasurable whole.”

 

— Fichte, The Vocation of Man (1800)

 

I found this quote in reference to the butterfly effect. I was thinking about this because of a book I have been reading on NDEs or near death experiences. A point that is made is the fact that every positive thing we do has far reaching positive consequences. If at all possible and we are present with the intention of knowing we can say something life giving knowing it can and most likely will have more far reaching positive consequences than we can possible imagine then how much easier might it be to do? Just a little food for thought.

[[Pa...]]

What a beautiful quote, and thank you for your comment about sharing positivity, words to live by. 

[[Jo...]]

I don’t think God ever just blesses one person.  I think there is always that “butterfly effect”… and I view the “butterflies” as those who never give up trying to continue to overcome whatever has to be faced in this life.

 

 

Kindly,

j

[[30...]]

I love this thread, I hope we can keep it going.  Never before in my fifty years on this planet have I contemplated suicide.  As a therapist, I could empathize (or so I thought) but I was firm in my conviction that "if you're sitting on the edge of that bridge ready to jump, but instead you decide to swing your legs the other way and embrace living - imagine what you could do!"

while I believe that still, in theory, what I was missing in saying this to so many people over the years was the absolute anguish they were most likely feeling to be in that state.  you know, two years ago before I began my second bout with Xanax (both following allergic reactions to meds), I read a quote by Michael Singer that said "Everything will be okay, when I am okay with everything".  I got a weird tingle in my spine and my VERY NEXT thought was "oh no, I wish I wouldn't have read that".  For some reason, I knew I had read that quote for a reason and that learning how to be "okay with anything and everything" was in the cards for me.  I did not know it would mean this fresh hell.  I am trying to find the meaning and the razor sharp faith it is going to require to move through this benzo hell.  That said, I have been a lover of stoicism, Viktor frankl, Michael singer, max lucado, the way of the peaceful warrior.......I have always been drawn to folks figuring out how to make meaning in their lives, including their struggles.  I never knew why I was so drawn to it.  Now, I feel I am in a daily existential quest to simply learn how to survive.  just literally get through the moment.  it feels inhumane.  maybe it is.  but I have to believe that there is some meaning in it.  not to sound like a martyr but one thing I do that helps me sometimes not give up is I will think "what if God (or whoever/whatever you believe in) came to you and said "Jennifer, you can go through this or you can pick a loved one to go through it for you"........in that moment I know I would not transfer this hell onto anyone I love and so I go on believing there is some purpose to this........talk about trimming the fat off the life of excess I lived prior to this experience.......I don't want a fancy car, high rise apartment, large savings account, summer home........I now just long to wake up in the morning and feel a sense of calm and the capacity to choose to sit on my patio and enjoy the sun or pick up one of my ten nieces and nephews and take them for an ice cream.  simple.  clean.  this process is reducing me down to not my weakest self (although it feels that way 23 out of 24 hours a day) but my cleanest self.  thanks for starting this thread!

[[Jo...]]

300

 

 

As I've gone through this for 13 years and counting (the meds battle)... I have learned only one thing.  Love is the only thing that really matters.  That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.  Thanks for sharing.  This experience has simplified my life tremendously, too.  Kindly, j

[[sa...]]

One of the things I've learned through my hardest experiences, especially my WD, is that when our brains are destroyed and we feel incapable of receiving God's love, we have to look outside ourselves for confirmation of it.  For example, I remember one particularly heinous day when I was at the beginning of my Temazepam taper when I was so miserable and so deep in depression that I cried out to God for help, even though I had little faith I would feel any different after.  What happened was that very shortly thereafter, my best friend showed up at my house unexpectedly.  He sent her to me, and it was exactly what I needed.  Moral of the story: look for God's helpers.  You never know who he may throw in your path and you never know how much of a blessing that person may turn out to be.

[[Jo...]]

One of the things I've learned through my hardest experiences, especially my WD, is that when our brains are destroyed and we feel incapable of receiving God's love, we have to look outside ourselves for confirmation of it.  For example, I remember one particularly heinous day when I was at the beginning of my Temazepam taper when I was so miserable and so deep in depression that I cried out to God for help, even though I had little faith I would feel any different after.  What happened was that very shortly thereafter, my best friend showed up at my house unexpectedly.  He sent her to me, and it was exactly what I needed.  Moral of the story: look for God's helpers.  You never know who he may throw in your path and you never know how much of a blessing that person may turn out to be.

 

Awesome !!  Says it all.  A friend here and I have posted about a few experiences such as these.  I think the name of the thread here is called “Real life experiences that have helped u in benzo withdrawals.”  I couldn’t agree more about what u said… and those things (people) have helped me the most… along with some personal experiences too.  That’s wonderful.  Look for God’s helpers.  Kindly, j

 

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=256560.20

[[Jo...]]

I think I posted post number 1 and number 18.

[[Bl...]]

I believe the Lord never gives anybody anything that they are not equipped to endure. 

[[Bl...]]

I am a firm believer that there are divine lessons to learn in all of our trials and adversity.  I wouldn't wish Benzo Hell on my worst enemy!!  That being said, I'd like to encourage those folks going through this to find the strength to share their stories. Long-term benzo use causes more harm than good.  I've worked in the medical community for over twenty five years and the lack of awareness of this issue is astonishing.  Get the word out - turn your hardship into something positive by getting your story told.  Much easier said than done, I know.  Love and Prayers to all.

[[ba...]]

"The Buddha was in recovery"

[[Jo...]]

I am a firm believer that there are divine lessons to learn in all of our trials and adversity.  I wouldn't wish Benzo Hell on my worst enemy!!  That being said, I'd like to encourage those folks going through this to find the strength to share their stories. Long-term benzo use causes more harm than good.  I've worked in the medical community for over twenty five years and the lack of awareness of this issue is astonishing.  Get the word out - turn your hardship into something positive by getting your story told.  Much easier said than done, I know.  Love and Prayers to all.

 

Blue Lion

 

Exactly.  We do what we can while we still have breath.  God bless you.

 

Kindly,

j