2.5 months benzo free after 30 years use

[[Wo...]]

God Bless you roughride ~

 

I'm sorry for the loss of your husband as I can't imaging what you went through. 

I bet you were so happy throwing the bad pills out.  I dream of this day soon & will let you know when I do.  I'm climbing the mountain nearing the top, I've heard it's beautiful on the other side.

 

Congrats on your Benzo recovery.  Again so sorry about your loss.

Thanks for the encouraging scripture in 1st Peter

 

God Bless

xoxo

[[sw...]]

Hey Rough Rider!

 

I am TommyB, I've been on the forum perhaps as long as you.

 

I read your initial success story entry and it is indeed inspiring. Thank you very much. That you continued with the taper and jumped after such a shock shows what you are made of.

 

I am inspired that someone with 30 yrs and such loss could continue and endeavor to remain positive makes me grateful that I am not alone in this journey.

 

I too have no partner, and I know what a blessing that can be. May your days have many windows of sunshine.

 

TommyB

[[ro...]]

Stopping in to say hello, and I'm still doing okay. Got through the holidays and my birthday, so thankful for that. It has been about 5 months since my last little bit of Diazepam, don't miss it...well, sometimes I miss something to calm me when stress is intense, I guess a better description is I don't crave it or seek after it, I'm thrilled that it's out of my life. It isn't the first thing to come to my mind when stressed.

 

@swammi01 Hi TommyB, I see you jumped since writing your post below, congratulations! I hope it is going well for you.

 

@Wolfie777 Your welcome and thanks for your kind words. You will throw those pills away one day, determine to make that you goal, and you will do it.

 

Happy New Year, everyone.

 

 

[[sw...]]

Stopping in to say hello, and I'm still doing okay. Got through the holidays and my birthday, so thankful for that. It has been about 5 months since my last little bit of Diazepam, don't miss it...well, sometimes I miss something to calm me when stress is intense, I guess a better description is I don't crave it or seek after it, I'm thrilled that it's out of my life. It isn't the first thing to come to my mind when stressed.

 

@swammi01 Hi TommyB, I see you jumped since writing your post below, congratulations! I hope it is going well for you.

 

@Wolfie777 Your welcome and thanks for your kind words. You will throw those pills away one day, determine to make that you goal, and you will do it.

 

Happy New Year, everyone.

 

 

Rough Rider:

Thanks for the congrats. I see that stress and related anxiety have been a problem still. I guess we will simply be better able to deal with anxiety in non-pharcalogic ways.

 

At any rate, that is why I got on benzos in the first place.

 

Here's to your getting many windows in the near future.

 

TommyB

[[Be...]]

I'm so sorry for your loss. He is up there smiling down.

[[tr...]]

I`m so sorry for your loss! I have been in the same situation, my husband died 3 weeks after CT.

As you write, stress and anxiety seem to last for a long time. The physical symptoms released after about 22 months, but not this. But I'm in a hurry, want to heal now! The nervous system needs time to heal, much longer than I think. So the high sensitivity to stress will be enough for a long time. Earlier, I could solve the problem with benso, but never again!

[[Ar...]]

Sorry for your loss.  Thank you for sharing your story.  You have brought me much hope that I too will heal.  I believe your husband is with you in spirit.  You were blessed to have such a love in your life.  Not all of us find that.  Wishing you love and joy for your continued life. 

[[Sa...]]

I'm so sorry about the loss of your husband. You have fought a very courageous battle. Good luck to you and congratulations on being benzo free!

[[ro...]]

Hi buddies, checking in after a month to see if any of you have written, and to give an update. I am without my husband 6 months on this date, 2/6, and benzo free for about the same period of time. I never think of the benzos anymore, and if I am having any symptoms, my mind doesn't connect it to the Benzos, though I'm sure I am still recovering to some degree, so thankful!

 

Thank you for your sympathy BenzoBFree123, translator 100, Arkansas1122, and Sadpepe. I still have tears at some point each day, but the deep deep DEEP pain is gone now. That is a relief as I don't know how people survive that level of grief for long. God is good, He provides, He has been carrying me through.

 

translator 100, I am so sorry you also experienced this, it is hard when husbands can be such a support system for us during times like this. But it sounds like you are doing fiarly well, thank you for sharing.

 

God bless!

[[Pi...]]

Your story brought tears to my eyes and so much hope. Going through probably two of the hardest things a person could go through in life and coming out on the other side. You are a true inspiration to me and I am thankful for your success story. I pray that God warms your heart in these times.

 

 

[[ro...]]

Two months have gone by since my last update, and going into my 9th month since taking my last minuscule dose of diazepam after tapering for approximately 9 months. Thank you for your post @PillCrumbz, I hope you are still continuing on your journey. Don't give up, I'm glad my post encouraged you.

 

I am doing quite well, still grieving the loss of my husband, but lingering symptoms related to the meds are all but gone. I am sleeping better, able to go out and about with friends though I do get tired and rest a bit after...that could be more related to grief then benzoes, or both, it's hard to tell. I am so thankful that there is no desire for medication, there never really was much, just did what the doctor told me was ok to do. I am not getting the abdominal pains and zinging nerve pains that I was. The improvements come subtly over time, but they come, at least in my case they did, and I used this med for about 30 years. I have some experiences that cause anxiety to go through yet, and to learn to calm myself down after, but I think losing my husband tops them all, and learning to deal with things I've never had to deal with before have been great "exercise" in that area.

 

If you are new to this, I remember how it felt to be new, it was scary and wondered if I'd ever get well, it takes time, but you will. Be patient with yourself and persevere, it's worth it in the end.

[[bo...]]

Me too roughride... it I still so worth it isn't it .

I had a bead wave a wee while ago at 10 months , but when I come out of it things are just so much better.i am so much more 'alive'..in the good times.

It's been a challenging time for you recently and so pleased to hear that you are coping. Lots of love to you BB xxx

[[Ju...]]

Bozob, i am in the middle of a bad wave at 10 months past my jump. Dang. thought I was free. I was living high since my jump, thought it was over.

Stress triggered it, huge influx of stress.

how long was your wave ?

thanks and good luck,

J

[[ro...]]

It has been almost a few months since my last visit, I guess that is a good sign, I'm not thinking about getting off Benzos or Benzos in general any more, and am getting on with life now, and all the challenges being a widow includes. Yes, I am still and plan to always be free of these awful meds. Do I miss the quick fix to anxiety they provided? Much less as I learn to live with and work through anxiety. I am able to do everything now, and most struggles now go back to learning to live alone as a widow, on 8/6 it will be a year since my dear precious husband passed and I completed my taper a week or two after.

 

@bozobrtie I'm sorry you had a bad week at 10 months, I am sorry I didn't see you post sooner....and you too @Justaman I hope you are both doing great and still benzo free. I tapered down to such a tiny amount I don't know that I'll have any trouble, my 10th month was last month...while I am changed a bit by benzos and the loss of my husband, I am not a victim, I'm a winner through the strength that God gives me each and every day....one day at a time.

[[fr...]]

Your husband’s celebrating with you in spirit. Congratulations on being benzo free.

great success story thanks for sharing it

[[So...]]

I am sorry about your loss. My mother passed away the same day I took my last little dose of Ativan. I grieved for six months. I just can't imagine how much more difficult would be to lose a partner of years. You are an inspiration!

 

Much peace, healing, and love!

[[fr...]]

Sad to hear about your husband and just love your positivity in regards to being benzo free I’m five weeks now and you give me hope thanks for sharing 🤞🤞🙏

[[ro...]]

I recently had someone send me a private message to see how I was, to receive some encouragement. I replied privately, but want to add to this thread saying that I am still doing well as far as being free of Benzos, it has been over 2 years now. I've had struggles, but they have been more related to being a new widow. Sometimes I think that my reactions are stronger because I withdrew from benzos, but am realizing that they are that way because I took Benzos to deal with stress in the first place. Stress is normal, I've had to learn to live with it as part of my life and not medicate it. I'm still learning. I have no desire at all to take medications and still only take a blood pressure med because I have to. Wishing all of you a wonderful Christmas, focus on the positive posts here, you will get better if you persevere.

[[La...]]

Thanks for coming back to give us an update, roughride! I'm so glad to know that you're still doing so well, although I'm very sorry about your loss.

 

Great post! Thanks again. Take good care.

[[Ra...]]

It was a year ago this month that I joined BenzoBuddies after discovering this forum when searching for symptoms that I was experiencing that baffled me. Long story short, it turned out that the Valium my MD had prescribed for about 30 years had gone from helpful friend to my enemy.

 

I began a taper cutting pills down then went over to liquid taper and micro-tapered down slowly to nothing, I think my signature lines should show my progress. I had rough days, but they always got better with time, and never were beyond handling.

 

Sadly, just before the end of my taper my husband of 38 years died suddenly, after a nice day together I found he had gone in his sleep 10 weeks ago tonight :-( Remarkably and with God's help I made it through this awful experience, the memorial service, and this terrible and painful journey of grief not needing or wanting any medication. I am pretty beaten up from grief, but am doing fairly well, able to get out more now as the agoraphobia is letting up, have some mild dizziness now and then, still have insomnia more than I'd like to, but it's hard to know the difference between the physical affects of the loss of the love of my life and benzo recovery, so I just take one day at a time and keep moving forward.

 

It was very freeing to throw the remaining pills away. It is the first time in 38 years that I have not seen or spoken to my husband for this long, and it is the first time in 30 years that there are no benzos in my home. I wish my husband was here to celebrate with me, he was very patient and loving during my journey through this and we were both so happy it was getting close to the end of my year long taper.

 

That is all I'm going to share, but if you have questions, please feel free to ask, and thank you to those who post such helpful posts. I try to keep my focus on the positive ones.

 

Wow that was beautiful and I am so sorry for your loss. And so happy for your toss!!!  I lost my fiancé abruptly on 09/14/2017 and had been on Clonazepam for 15 years.  I was tolerant to it and was having very bad problems. Mark (my fiancé) had told me to stop taking the pills so to honor him on my birthday that same year I began my two year taper.  It has been rough as I have missed him and I also don't know if my issues are from grief, loneliness or the taper.  I am almost down to nothing and have about 40-days left to taper.  At times I have wanted to updose but I just kept pushing through.  I can't wait to thrown my pills away in less than two months.  Again congrats and may you find peace and love everywhere you go.  Merry Christmas to you! 

[Guest [Bn...]]

Thank you for responding very glad you are feeling better inspite of struggles.  💜✌️🙏

 

B

[Guest [Bn...]]

Thanks for your thoughts it is great to know that there is another side to this.  💜✌️🙏

[Guest [Bn...]]

Thank you so much.

 

B

[[Ma...]]

Thank you for posting.  I feel so bad that you cannot share your triumph with your husband.  My husband of 20 years has been with me in my struggle.  I have been off benzos for 18 months now after a 17 year use. I am 67, and this is my second marriage.  You must be near to my age if you had been married for that long.  Older women like us face special challenges in recovery.  I am not healed yet, but my cognitive function has improved.  Your husband lives on in your memories.  He would have been proud of you.  God bless you today.  Marja