Retired Military and have been on 4mg clonazepam since 2003

[[Mo...]]

wise decision subkiller, there is so much valuable information on this Forum.

Juliea has given you one important link, i would take the time and read.

 

here is another one, which will make it much easier for you to understand.

 

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=66397.0

 

for some odd reason we have to be smart now, the majority of us have no Benzo-wise

doctor , we have to help ourselves and we do, thanks to Ashton and Colin.

 

[[Pe...]]

Thank you, Sir!  We will all rest a bit easier now.  If you can manage a very slow taper you may have minimal disruption to your life.  Being mentally strong at the onset of a cold turkey is no match for the ebb and flow of brain chemicals.  Imagine having Parkinson's, MS, debilitating vertigo, extreme paranoia, issues with rage and anger at what has been done to you with no real warning from your MD, unrelenting tinnitus, fibromyalgia, symptoms of detaching retina, fear of epilepsy, severe thought blocking, akathesia, dyslexia, insomnia, rubber legs, amnesia, depersonalization, derealization, severe sound sensitivity, unbearable nausea, diabetes, brain zaps, stroke, weight loss with muscle wasting, total exhaustion, sand bagged legs, blood pressure drops, heart palpitations and my all time favorite, Malaria.  I saw a list here somewhere that had what appeared to be about 100 miserable symptoms (my brain is literally preventing me from remembering where this is located).  These are the symptoms I experienced and fully expect to live with for some time.  To live with this for a month is bad, but when it gets to the point where your benzo brain is telling you there is no end in sight it becomes pretty much impossible to cope.  Expect the best but prepare yourself for the worst.  This will become an adventure in survival...good or bad, you will survive.  Everyone gets better.  It is just a matter of when.  👍 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Thank you, Sir!  We will all rest a bit easier now.  If you can manage a very slow taper you may have minimal disruption to your life.  Being mentally strong at the onset of a cold turkey is no match for the ebb and flow of brain chemicals.  Imagine having Parkinson's, MS, debilitating vertigo, extreme paranoia, issues with rage and anger at what has been done to you with no real warning from your MD, unrelenting tinnitus, fibromyalgia, symptoms of detaching retina, fear of epilepsy, severe thought blocking, akathesia, dyslexia, insomnia, rubber legs, amnesia, depersonalization, derealization, severe sound sensitivity, unbearable nausea, diabetes, brain zaps, stroke, weight loss with muscle wasting, total exhaustion, sand bagged legs, blood pressure drops, heart palpitations and my all time favorite, Malaria.  I saw a list here somewhere that had what appeared to be about 100 miserable symptoms (my brain is literally preventing me from remembering where this is located).  These are the symptoms I experienced and fully expect to live with for some time.  To live with this for a month is bad, but when it gets to the point where your benzo brain is telling you there is no end in sight it becomes pretty much impossible to cope.  Expect the best but prepare yourself for the worst.  This will become an adventure in survival...good or bad, you will survive.  Everyone gets better.  It is just a matter of when.  👍

 

Darn, Peruzer, it's been awhile since I saw all of those symptoms at one time! I'm doing quite, well, considering I have MS, Parkinson's, vertigo, paranoia - wait, extreme paranoia, etc. etc. etc.!

 

subkiller, please take care of yourself. We're kind of on our own with this. Best to be cautious. The enemy is dangerous, my friend. And the battle is long. But we will persevere! Glad you found this site.

[[Pe...]]

Mind seeker.....I forgot to list the Acid Trip and repetitive thought disorder... 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Mind seeker.....I forgot to list the Acid Trip and repetitive thought disorder... 

 

Ha! That's what I got right now!

[[Pe...]]

Whoa, I see you are doing a fast taper!  Keep the faith!

[Guest [Mi...]]

Whoa, I see you are doing a fast taper!  Keep the faith!

 

Yeah, I didn't know about the slow taper until I was down to about 1 mg or so.

 

Wish my doctor would have told me. I might not be in this state of perpetual depersonalization. 

 

Now I'm having to hold due to a really bad cold. I think my body is telling my mind something.

 

[[Pe...]]

Unfortunately too many of us hit this lovely sweet spot unaware.  I too was caught unprepared.  I was in crisis when coldly informed by a strange new pdoc there were no more refills after 10 years of being told there would be no problems getting off this demon and it did nothing but increase my symptoms.  I could have up dosed when I found a pdoc that agreed to help but thought surely an up dose would have to be lethal to help me.  I fast fast tapered only to avoid seizures and jumped before I found BB as my insurance ran out when I abandoned my job.  I thought I could take it, I was a nurse for shitsake!  Depersonalization actually helps me as I feel this is happening to someone else and I am just along for the ride.  We all get well, and together, one by one we will wake one morning to a brand new life!  There are too many success stories to think otherwise! 👍

[Guest [Mi...]]

Unfortunately too many of us hit this lovely sweet spot unaware.  I too was caught unprepared.  I was in crisis when coldly informed by a strange new pdoc there were no more refills after 10 years of being told there would be no problems getting off this demon and it did nothing but increase my symptoms.  I could have up dosed when I found a pdoc that agreed to help but thought surely an up dose would have to be lethal to help me.  I fast fast tapered only to avoid seizures and jumped before I found BB as my insurance ran out when I abandoned my job.  I thought I could take it, I was a nurse for shitsake!  Depersonalization actually helps me as I feel this is happening to someone else and I am just along for the ride.  We all get well, and together, one by one we will wake one morning to a brand new life!  There are too many success stories to think otherwise! 👍

 

I'm so sorry that happend to you, Peruzer. But I really like your optimism! You make me 

[[Pe...]]

Mindseeker, ❤️

[[su...]]

Going into day four and I actually feel better. Throttled back on the gabapentin to 100mg tid, I remember it made me feel strange when I took for neuralgia last year

(got launched off my bike and crushed my cheekbone and had a blowout fracture of my left orbital socket) and I stopped after three days ( ya know what works ...good ole oxycodone! Anyways, I am good as new now.) I am think of starting my taper at 2mg instead of 3mg with a loading dose of 3 to start.  Any thoughts?

[Guest [Mi...]]

Going into day four and I actually feel better. Throttled back on the gabapentin to 100mg tid, I remember it made me feel strange when I took for neuralgia last year

(got launched off my bike and crushed my cheekbone and had a blowout fracture of my left orbital socket) and I stopped after three days ( ya know what works ...good ole oxycodone! Anyways, I am good as new now.) I am think of starting my taper at 2mg instead of 3mg with a loading dose of 3 to start.  Any thoughts?

 

Hi, subkiller. What is a "loading dose of 3"? Are you upping your Klonopin to 3 mg before coming off your usual 2 mg? I'm a bit confused by that.

 

I think we're going to need to keep an extra eye on you, my friend. I'm afraid you're going to rush this. Please don't. I would much rather see folks go slow and have less problems than go quickly and not succeed. I've said this many times - it's a marathon, not a sprint.

 

We want everyone to make it to the finish line. That's the important part. Not how quickly but that you make it. The enemy is tough and will easily blindside you. Best to be cautious and come prepared for the fight.

[[el...]]

Going into day four and I actually feel better

 

Sub,

 

When I initially cut klonopin, I didn't feel 'any' symptoms until about 6 days later - then I got hit hard with terrible tinnitus and cognitive fog and seizure-like movements.  It is a wise decision to go back on k and taper appropriately.

 

We here are the voices of experience - many doctors don't know the devastating effects that can happen during w/d.

 

All the best -

 

Ellen

[Guest [Mi...]]

One other thought. . . Klonopin has a long half-life of over 30 hours. This may make it easier to taper from then, say, Ativan. However, it leads you to believe you're doing great so you taper faster only to be blindsided by hideous withdrawal a couple of days later.

 

Just what I've learned from experience. 

[[Pe...]]

Sub, I read something once and since "meeting" you here it very much reminds me of you.

 

 

"Throw me to the wolves, I will come back leading the pack", I do not know who wrote it.

 

 

What will you do when you are so damn paranoid you scare your wife.  What if she is so fearful of you she calls 911 thinking you might hurt her or yourself?  What do you say to the ambulance crew who are telling you to calm down, we need to strap you to this gurney.  ....and what do you say to the police who arrive to assist?  What do you say to the admitting staff when they tell you you have been diagnosed as a schizophrenic and need heavy psychotropic meds for the rest of your life and cannot go home until you take them to the point you can only sit and drool?  What do you say to the judge when you are so drugged from the Thorazine used while you had to be restrained after you tried to push staff away in you fearfulness and it was documented as an assault?

 

 

At this point, my friend, you will have absolutely no credibility.  You will be told it was not your medication but your mental illness.  You will have entered our mental health system.

 

 

You may gain release eventually but the stigma will follow you forever.  And the last question you need to ask yourself is...

 

 

What will your wife tell your grandchildren when they ask, "Why did this happen to Granpa?  Didn't he used to fly an airplane?  Wasn't he strong and healthy?  Wasn't he the smartest hero?  Didn't he try to lead a pack of wolves fearlessly?  What happened to grandpa, grandma?"

 

 

Please, my friend, back off the throttle.  A vehicle is fully able to idle forward at slow speed.  An accident is far easier to survive if you are not going 100 miles an hour.

 

 

 

 

[[Cr...]]

To all of you;I feel all your pain(including non stop peeing and urinary pain), but what is so UNBEARABLE is having to live alone and deal with this AGONY;also in my mid 50's! Bad divorce from retired ex-military(which started this whole thing). I guess we just have to deal....prayers to all of you!

[[su...]]

Crossroads, I am sorry for your troubles.

 

I am going to go back on on 09 Jun with a loading dose of 3mg in the am followed by a 1mg dose at night, then 1 and 1 the next day.  I have not been on the other drugs long enough to taper them.  I have read Dr. Ashton's book and find nothing new from a medical standpoint, and a good of unproven material and hypotheses. Sorry , I call 'em as I see 'em. I see no reason to go all the way back up to 2mg bid when I have gone down to 1mg bid before for a month then increased back to 2mg bid and used this drug as a crutch to get through a tough time...no more.

[[Pe...]]

3mg to 1mg in per dose in a day?  Then what, hold?

[[Cr...]]

Subkiller. Thanks for your post; I hear you loud and clear....does exercise help you and how are you sleeping...that's the worst for me.up half the night obsessing about everything then DRAINED all day but keep trying to carry on. Your in my prayers!   

[[gr...]]

Ohh Im so saddened when i see this and plus when i see people on gabapentin. What a terrible drug to get off of also.

As i go to take my dose, i just get a sick feeling everytime i put it in my mouth...yuck. Then comes the fogginess and tiredness.

[[Pe...]]

Groove, I am so glad you showed up.  You can provide some good feedback here. 

[[Cr...]]

Groovejuice.. I felt the same way while on gabapentine that's why I stopped after a short time taking it;buspar was no different either> Are getting any sleep? There has to be some reason for all of this...I feel that I'm being tested hopefully for something better(for all of us)! I try to watch something that makes me laugh(even though there are times I really don't feel like it) Hang in there

 

 

Peruzer...Hi! How are you feeling?

[[gr...]]

Hello CR's

Good u were able to stop it before becoming dependent, its JUST as hard to come off as a benzo for SOME...many.

I only sleep maybe 4-hrs a night, with some bouts of insomnia after cuts of my K.

Im a bit confused really

 

We have subkiller and crossroads saying some of the same things, updose, load dose to 3mg. They are both x military etc so my benzo brain is warping lol.

 

Im just going to say the same as everyone. If youve been on the benzo for any amount of time more than a few weeks..taper is advised. If for some miracle of a reason, you have been on longer, and cold turkeyd before in the past and was alright....wow I cant say anything except....wow.

 

I would never increase aka load dose. No reason to do so. I would stay where I am at and begin a 5-10 percent taper with holds for 10-14 days. Yes this is Ashton. All of her info is based on 100's of people she helped et off benzos and is documented.

 

Of course any one is free to do what they feel is best for them! If they can cold turkey, rapid taper whatever and be OK, then pffft more power to them.

 

With thousands of people being here over the years and having no fun with sx's from tapering, i just say...beware.

Good luck in whatever method is chosen.

 

I hate benzos and I hate Gabapentin. Im gonna mae some bumper stickers I think

[[je...]]

How long have you been off now? I c/t for 3 weeks and didn't feel that bad the first week, the second week I really got hit. Good luck with everything! Jenny

[[...]]

I have read Dr. Ashton's book and find nothing new from a medical standpoint, and a good of unproven material and hypotheses. Sorry , I call 'em as I see 'em.

I also call 'em as I see 'em, but I'm glad to say I was a bit more careful about saying that when I came here.

 

I also heal fast, throw off things fast. I was on 1 mg of Klonopin daily, and I simply stopped. That was 14 months ago.

 

I thought I was luckier, stronger and more healthy than most anyone here. And for the record, I have not missed a day of work ever, so I survived.

 

But I should have listened more, and Klonopin kicked my ass. I'm just getting close to feeling fully sane now, on good days.

 

So do what works for you, and if it works, that's great. But these benzso are tricky things. Quitting Klonopin is just about the hardest thing I ever did.

 

Good luck...

 

Gary