XANAX Support Blog: If you're tapering Xanax/alprazolam, join in the discussion!

[[la...]]

Hey guys,

 

I'm nearing in on a month of Xanax now, so figured I'de give an update.

 

 

I've had good days, and really bad days.  I tried to get off the small dose of Abilify that I'm on, but got slammed back with depression again.  I'm back on it, and feeling pretty good. 

 

I've been on the job hunt, and in the last 2 days I've had 2 interviews, and taken 6 different tests for them.  I'm not sure how this whole job thing is going to go, but I'm going to give it a shot.  The thing that has me worried is  it's an accounting job, and I'm worried about cog fog.  For example, 2 of the tests I've done are Wonderlick tests, and both scored me 16 IQ points under what I've normally scored in the past. I had trouble comprehending questions I'de normally be fine with. 

 

So I dunno.  I guess the good news is I feel good enough to be working (and taking a class at university this summer).  The bad news is I'm having to rely on Abilify to keep me out of bad depression.  I feel like I'm just going to not worry about it, keep taking it, and worry about getting off it down the road a bit after I've had more time post-benzo.

 

 

[[Sy...]]

I feel so utterly beat. Monday I had my pDoc apt

FIRST thing the lady says 'the state will no longer help you" I was a bit confused as I have been going there seeing the same dr for 10 years with a 15buck co-pay. She said something about how i quit the methadone and quiting xanax, Oh but this wasn't what she as a front desk lady should know.

 

They said 80dollars to see the doc. Now I know why they made me the last apt of the day. I was in major panic, they strong armed me into pay or leave! So i gave them my credit card, total bullisht for a 10min talk at the pill mill they call caring and compassionate!

 

The dr. He basically was very understanding, but had this upset look when I showed him my taper schedule. I told him about the front desk bs, he said that wasnt legal and he himself wanted to see me at his private practice in town NO CHARGE. kind of weary about that. But godbless him for knowing me for ten years. And i will get 30 mins (If it wasnt BS). Sadly He as usual had script for 105 bars2mg PRN xanax alredy printed but is willing to Dry cut, Valium crossover,Whatever.

 

He is putting  it in my hands, but added that I may wan't to add Tegretol to the mix. I said no way. He told me to go to my 'big computer" (He can be very dry with his humor/sarcasm) and research it. I was in complete panic and he knew this my last time at the state funded place because I quit payin them for methadone and on xanax taper. All they wan't is money! They pulled counselling and my case worker. I told them to kiss my butt (Was abit more explicit) but then I felt bad and said im just stressed later, Lady just grunted a hmm, 'YEAH". Turns out she was just a um nasty person..

 

SO UPSIDE I could fill a small childs swimming pool with xanax bars oh and since he alredy printed that script, before i could ask for smaller pills to cut, out came another script for 70 .5mg alprazolam... I lost all state funded help, with that place it's probably a blessing because they are complete crap, and if they did lose funding, allot of people are screwed.

 

Sorry for the rant it is hard for me to believe they lost state funding. I am just glad my Pdoc has his own practice. There is allot more to what happened. But im just wiped out. Last night i drank 2 glasses of wine after over ten years of abstaining. It felt good I wont lie, but today was rough. So that was that... Looks like im on my own with taper plan, and he will go with it. Would have liked more input other than 'look into Tegretol if you want that' 5-10min just not enough to explain. So kinda good/kinda crap. I am down to 6.25mg now and wont look back..  /rant. 

 

HOPE & RESPECT

Synap

 

Edit: Ok, so I edited this and posted in

Withdrawal Support (during your taper)

[[Ch...]]

Hi everyone! Friday is the day I go to my psychiatrist to FINALLY show her my taper plan & now I can't find the plan or links you have posted for me. HELP!! I don't know how to research it. How can I search for the links you guys were so nice to give me? Also, do you know a way that would be best for me to mark these so I won't lose them again.....Thank you SO much!! I am so sorry! I am ready to do this! I have been off suboxone for over 1 month & 1/2!

 

Thanks again!

 

[[ba...]]

Hi everyone! Friday is the day I go to my psychiatrist to FINALLY show her my taper plan & now I can't find the plan or links you have posted for me. HELP!! I don't know how to research it. How can I search for the links you guys were so nice to give me? Also, do you know a way that would be best for me to mark these so I won't lose them again.....Thank you SO much!! I am so sorry! I am ready to do this! I have been off suboxone for over 1 month & 1/2!

 

Thanks again!

 

I'm having a hard time following your timeline.  You've been on Benzo Buddies for a long time.  What are you having difficulty with?

[[Mo...]]

Hi everyone! Friday is the day I go to my psychiatrist to FINALLY show her my taper plan & now I can't find the plan or links you have posted for me. HELP!! I don't know how to research it. How can I search for the links you guys were so nice to give me? Also, do you know a way that would be best for me to mark these so I won't lose them again.....Thank you SO much!! I am so sorry! I am ready to do this! I have been off suboxone for over 1 month & 1/2!

 

Thanks again!

 

 

Hey ChiMom,

 

Go to your Profile and then to your Post.  There is a post titled "need help with my taper plan", click on that and it has some taper plans that different buddies have given you.  Good Luck with you doctor's visit.

 

Monique

[[Ch...]]

Thank you SOO much Monique!

 

Yes, I have been a member for a while, but I have had 1 unsuccessful try to get off xanax. Then I had to get off suboxone before my xanax taper. I didn't know you could look things up that way. Very cool! 

[[br...]]

Hello everyone,

 

I thought I would pop inn here to show my support. So many threads that have their own regulars posting and of course for obvious reasons, but I thought it would be best to offer my experience here should anybody need some extra help.

 

Wishing you all well and speedy recoveries.

 

Bring It On

 

[[Mo...]]

Thank you SOO much Monique!

 

Yes, I have been a member for a while, but I have had 1 unsuccessful try to get off xanax. Then I had to get off suboxone before my xanax taper. I didn't know you could look things up that way. Very cool! 

 

Good Luck with your doctor visit, let us know how it goes.

[[ba...]]

i need to keep my doses sizes stable and steady yesterday around um 7pm i took my daily meds i keep a bottle of my meds in my pocket all the time in there is just small cut pieces cutting a pill into 4 or 8 pieces yesterday i took a cut walgreens blue pill that was approximatly 1/4- 1/8 from 1pm pill sometimes other days i usually take a small cut piece from a .50mg from stuf thats a year old :/ , last nights dose seemed to be stronger than usual

[[Sy...]]

The last few days have felt like months. I was able to go out to dinner yesterday AND EAT, had the best black bean burger, and lightly roasted potatoes with hummus. I was happy and hungry and had little if any wicked symptoms.. Been good last few days, other than night and mornings. I do hate the ringing in ears, and my fast heart that tends to wake me just as the sun is coming up. Same thing every morning. Im pushing myself to cut another .25 today, yes 4 days after last .25. I just want to see if i get all the mental s/x back or if it's gona be semi tolerable. Since im at higher dose a 10% cut should be ok. I hope to be able to cope better now that I have an idea what to expect. I am stronger just knowing that d/r and d/p may happen, but if i stop accept it for what it is, that it won't last forever I can sorta deal ok. I may eat those words down the line, but I try to keep going till i feel overwhelmed. So I will hit the 6mg xanax mark. Should be able to feel it out from there. Decided to dry cut the entire way down.  We shall see... 

[[Ra...]]

Synap, good luck on your next cut, please keep us posted.  I'm also tapering from a fairly high dose (3mg), so will be watching you with great interest.

 

BIO - thanks for stopping in to offer your support 

 

Shout out to Mrs, VCharis, and Carita, how are you ladies doing? 

 

I'm still doing well so far (fingers crossed).

 

Hugs everyone 

 

Rabbit

[[VC...]]

Hey Rabbit and everyone. Thought I'd check in.

 

Missed a whole night's sleep (night before last), crashed all day, came unhinged, panicky, crying, depressed, almost delirious with fear. Not sure what happened but I was sleeping regularly, finally, then BAM - wide awake with adrenaline surges all night. My usual epsom salt bath didn't help, adrenal breathing exercises didn't help -  freaked me out. The longer you watch the clock in the wee hours, the worse the anxiety grows. Then last night, almost the same thing, only this time the adrenaline surges tried to taper off somewhat and I grabbed a little sleep, not much. Dark funk today, no appetite, worry, exhaustion.

 

I don't know if my 'cuts' caught up with me, or I overdid it the other day running errands, getting upset, doing too much in one day. I'd spent so much time in bed for weeks that when I finally felt better, I decided to get some things done. My adrenals are paying for it now.  Lots of emotional stressors this weekend...guess I'll hold my cut for a few days and see if that helps. I had just gotten through the incident with missing my bedtime xanax dose a few nights ago, now this. Maybe I shouldn't have resumed my taper quite so fast. Anyway, need to update my sig line. Thanks for listening to me 

 

Huggies to all,

VC 

 

 

[[Ju...]]

I'm sorry you got hit VC.  This was my fear with daily tapering.  I would have needed a real big whack to realize I was getting hit, (over-tapering via a daily taper), because I'd lived with the symptoms soooooooo long and was accustomed to them.  I'd pay as close of an eye as possible, (wish I could tell you how to do that if one is accustomed to having symptoms), and maybe build in some routine holds.  Not sure how to advise.  I hope you feel better soon. 

[[VC...]]

I'm sorry you got hit VC.  This was my fear with daily tapering.  I would have needed a real big whack to realize I was getting hit, (over-tapering via a daily taper), because I'd lived with the symptoms soooooooo long and was accustomed to them.  I'd pay as close of an eye as possible, (wish I could tell you how to do that if one is accustomed to having symptoms), and maybe build in some routine holds.  Not sure how to advise.  I hope you feel better soon. 

 

Thanks, Juliea. Building in a routine 'hold' sounds like a plan. I expected daily tapering to go milder than this, but then again, my CNS is super fragile and I'd barely recovered from missing that full bedtime dose the other night. Guess I should factor that in. Everything seems okay as long as I'm able to sleep 5-6 hrs. Either I'll cut smaller amounts or hold routinely (or both!) to avoid this kind of thing. Just hate that it's gonna take me forever to get this taper done. Wouldnt be so bad, except I worry about the "what-if's"...example: what if I have to be hospitalized for something and cant get my usual liquid tapered doses? I don't even know what dose I'm actually taking if a doctor should ask. OMG. Okay, I admit, my benz brain is still a mess today 

[[Ra...]]

Oh V, I'm so sorry you got hit so had.  You've had a very bumpy ride.  It sounds like holding for a bit might be the ticket to get you back on track.  That no sleep thing, as we've discussed before is a killer.  In this day and age, it just amazes me the medical profession is still so ignorant about how to help us.  You will get through this though.  And don't worry about being hospitalized, that wont happen, you will be OK.  Just make sure your hubby knows what you're doing and IF that should ever happen, he will let them know.  I've worried about the same thing.  We can 'what if' ourselves silly.  I'm bad at that too, but my hubby helps keep me in line there.  He's a life line for me.  I continue to pay for you sweet V!

 

Love,

 

Rabbit

[[je...]]

Did my last cut today! Down to .0625 daily! So far so good, wish me luck that this goes well and I will soon be FREE!

[[VC...]]

... Just make sure your hubby knows what you're doing and IF that should ever happen, he will let them know.  I've worried about the same thing.  We can 'what if' ourselves silly.  I'm bad at that too, but my hubby helps keep me in line there.  He's a life line for me.  I continue to pray for you sweet V!

 

Hehe...yeah, Rabbit, I actually wrote out my taper dose instructions on an index card for him, in case I land in the hospital. He said he'd smuggle in my spice jars with my taper doses if it came to that. But then my benzo brain started brainstorming another imaginary scenario. What if he mixes too MUCH xanax, or worse yet, not enough? He's been known to have brain farts. Told him I don't trust anyone to make my solution but me, to which he replied, "well then, you're hopeless." 

 

Did my last cut today! Down to .0625 daily! So far so good, wish me luck that this goes well and I will soon be FREE!

 

Hey Jennlynn! Way to go! What a great feeling, knowing you'll soon be free. Wish I were that close. You're doing it! Kicking benzo butt!

 

VC 

[[Ra...]]

... Just make sure your hubby knows what you're doing and IF that should ever happen, he will let them know.  I've worried about the same thing.  We can 'what if' ourselves silly.  I'm bad at that too, but my hubby helps keep me in line there.  He's a life line for me.  I continue to pray for you sweet V!

 

Hehe...yeah, Rabbit, I actually wrote out my taper dose instructions on an index card for him, in case I land in the hospital. He said he'd smuggle in my spice jars with my taper doses if it came to that. But then my benzo brain started brainstorming another imaginary scenario. What if he mixes too MUCH xanax, or worse yet, not enough? He's been known to have brain farts. Told him I don't trust anyone to make my solution but me, to which he replied, "well then, you're hopeless." 

 

Did my last cut today! Down to .0625 daily! So far so good, wish me luck that this goes well and I will soon be FREE!

 

Hey Jennlynn! Way to go! What a great feeling, knowing you'll soon be free. Wish I were that close. You're doing it! Kicking benzo butt!

 

VC 

 

Hi V, Yep, I keep a written log of what I take every day and hubby knows the plan.  He's good at math so I trust him, probably more than myself.  A couple of weeks ago, I was getting ready to take my evening dose and looked again at what was in there for Friday evening.  Though really hard about what was in there, something didn't add up.  I had shorted myself .5mg.  Glad I figured it out quick and before I took it.  I would probably have had a coronary if I'd taken it and realized I'd shorted myself .5mg. UGH.  So now I double check my own math, which has never been very good and having 2 different strengths of pills just compounds the issue.  I'll get it right though.

 

 

Jenny, good for you.  We'll be keeping our eyes on you. You're doing so well. I wish you well and hope your jump is uneventful.

 

Hugs,

 

Rabbit

[[Bl...]]

Did my last cut today! Down to .0625 daily! So far so good, wish me luck that this goes well and I will soon be FREE!

Wonderful. I hope you celebrated by doing something you love.

 

Blue

[[Mo...]]

Did my last cut today! Down to .0625 daily! So far so good, wish me luck that this goes well and I will soon be FREE!

 

That's great Jenny! 

[[th...]]

Has anyone has to dose more than 4 x day on xanax? I dose every six hrs now. Even the middle of the night. Set an alarm. I feel like my body is telling me to dose more, that the interdose wds are hitting me sooner. Just wondering if anyone else had same issues. ??

 

Yay Jenny!!! Hope the post ride is smooth!!

[[Ju...]]

Has anyone has to dose more than 4 x day on xanax? I dose every six hrs now. Even the middle of the night. Set an alarm. I feel like my body is telling me to dose more, that the interdose wds are hitting me sooner. Just wondering if anyone else had same issues. ??

 

Yay Jenny!!! Hope the post ride is smooth!!

 

Yes, Notforme dosed 6X per day.  I'm sure others have done this to get free.  Sorry you're getting hit with the interdose stuff grinch. 

[[th...]]

Thanks. I'm still recovering from my tramadol hell jump so gonna see what happens. Maybe things will settle down. But ya, terrible interdose wds 24/7.  ..

[[mr...]]

Hi all

 

Just checking in to say hello and give an update

 

I'm down to 39mL of my remaining water titration -- 39mL! That's just 39 more good days to go I have come so far, and am grateful for all the progress and healing that has occurred thus far, and even more grateful and in awe of the healing that will complete itself in me in the near future. What a true gift and blessing it is. And miraculous as well, not to mention   I have been working on myself at the same time, working to take the opportunities presented to grow in faith, hope, peace, and joy. I'm very much in love with and grateful for my warrior & hero husband, standing by my side through this. And boy, I'll tell you what -- I am very much looking forward to giving back to him in the near future. I am blessed

 

I've had hints of this in the recent past couple weeks and/or months, but its really looking like I no longer feel a cut in dosage reduction. This is somewhat surreal, as this is a newer experience for me. I'm still following a pattern of a gradual dosage reduction until the end here, just to be smart and gentle with my body. But its kind of neat to experience this

 

The past few weeks & months have been the best yet, with glimpses of real clarity. I've had some goofy tough waves as well, and have had them more often then I'd like, & they're "goofier" that is like them to be, but whose isn't that way? Healing is happening right here and right now. And this is still my life, right here and right now. And I desire & work to choose to enjoy every minute of it each day, just as I am right now And I look forward to tomorrow's promised and guaranteed betterment that awaits me It is coming, Amen

 

Life is happening Today, and I am grateful for my gift of today Freedom and health are real, and they are coming to us all. Very soon.

 

Take care for now and God bless,

 

Mrs.

[[Bl...]]

Mrs.

 

Blue