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Dear Doctor - my first draft


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Initially I was considering giving you the benefit of the doubt  because I thought your intentions were in my best interest and perhaps in part, it was a simple case of ignorance of the damage these drugs do

 

However after one of our last sessions you challenged that premise with your emphatic statement to me that “I am the expert and YOU are not” after I had challenged your opinion on taking yet another anticonvulsant after already having experienced the damage from the first one, which as is no longer a surprise to me, turned out to be toxic to me in the end.  

 

This would indicate either you truly are ignorant and therefore NOT the expert you claim or that you in fact had full knowledge.  So either you are not an expert and should not claim to be one or you exhibited unethical behavior and should excuse yourself from practicing.

 

You put me on drugs I didn't need for conditions I never had that ultimately caused significant damage.  Your “expertise” has resulted in my enduring a major surgery and the loss of my gallbladder unnecessarily, a lifetime of enduring a chronic auto immune disease which has triggered second chronic AI disease, Celiacs disease (Look it up).  And an excruciating and unbelievably extended withdrawal from a highly addictive benzodiazapine.

 

In addition to the significant financial losses I've already incurred at your hand, you have severely minimized my quality of life, profoundly impaired my ability to earn a living and permanently damaged my body.  Your Hippocratic Oath includes the promise "to abstain from doing harm".  In my case, you failed.

 

And as that same Oath concludes “If I fulfill this oath and do not violate it, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and art, being honoured with fame among all men for all time to come; if I transgress it and swear falsely, may the opposite of all this be my lot.”  I would like very much to believe this to be true.

 

I have tried over and over to forgive you.  Not for you, but for me.  However  thus far I have been unsuccessful and have finally determined that the only solace and resolution that I can possibly expect is that perhaps this letter, for even a brief time, will require you to think of me as frequently as I have, over the past several years spent enduring this ongoing and absolutely unnecessary series of  traumas, thought of you.

 

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“I am the expert and YOU are not” ~ I hate it when they act like that.

 

We have some of the same health issues.  No wonder you know so much.  I have several AI's and also Celiacs.  I wonder which part of this made our immune system so confused and start to attack 'self'.  I also almost had gall bladder surgery this year.  I had to have my thyroid and parathyroid out last year due to autoimmune diseases. We might be related!!!

 

I'm sorry you had to go through that.  You are a very smart cookie.

 

mmmm.... cookie.  Oh yeah, no gluten for us. 

 

 

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Hi WiseWomanWithIssues,

 

While understandable the pain and anger we feel towards certain people who we sought to help us, BenzoBuddies should not be a place for lashing out at the medical field. I'm happy you decided to let out your feelings in a healthy manor, but I don't find your letter appropriate for this specific board. Please repost this to your buddie blog, as that is a more private place for you to share things such as this. If you haven't yet started one, you may create it in the "Buddie Blogs" board. I'm also leaving a bullet from the Form User Manuel, which should give you better insight on 'doctor bashing'. This topic is locked,

 

Shane

Whilst some of our members report negative experiences with doctors, psychiatrists, or the wider medical profession, and although we do not wish to outlaw comments about how members feel let down and mistreated in their personal medical care, you are not permitted to use this community as a platform to spread general anti-doctor or anti-psychiatry propaganda. Nor should you, unless you are posting a recommendation, name those involved in your healthcare. For more about this policy, please read our Anti-doctor and Anti-psychiatry Sentiments Advisory notice.

Forum User Manuel

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