mental paralysis

[[we...]]

it takes me hours to do anything at all.  It's like my brain is paralyzed.  6 months off.  anyone else?

[[Ma...]]

I know you don't like to type much, but can you maybe tell us what your days consist of?  What are you able to do?  I know for me that helps to be able to give some advice on what has helped me if I know what you do.  Hope that isn't a bother!

[[Fl...]]

I'm coming up on 7 months off and I still have cognitive issues. Just trying to hold a business conversation is taxing. I have a hard time keeping track of my thoughts and stringing them together to try to get my point across is a challenge. When I get finished I feel drained and it seems to even trigger a brief wave of symptoms sometimes.

[[li...]]

I have days like that Julie to.  I try to make a mental note in the evening when I feel my best of things I want to accomplish the next day.  i sure miss chat.  Linder  xo

[[we...]]

i get up, eat, brush my teeth, get dressed, stretch, eat, lie down, eat, lie down, eat, walk, eat, lie down. ( I have to eat constrantly, I don't feel hunger and not putting on wt.)

[[Ma...]]

do you find working on the computer is easier than other things?  It is definitely for me...also forcing myself to focus on something I am trying to read or watch.  And I find music is essential...listening to things that remind me of younger days and singing to them, especially if I'm able to walk!  Don't know if that helps, but the cog fog is my worst symptom...feel like a vegetable most of the day

[[we...]]

music not yet, cog fog , vegetable, yes.

[[Wh...]]

i get up, eat, brush my teeth, get dressed, stretch, eat, lie down, eat, lie down, eat, walk, eat, lie down. ( I have to eat constrantly, I don't feel hunger and not putting on wt.)

 

Sounds like a normal day in withdrawal land.    The cog fog is brutal huh ... did I say I hate Benzo's today?

[[ar...]]

Your days sound like mine. Get up, feel like crap, lie down, get up, eat something, lie down, head spinning, cry with frustration, lie down, etc. etc. Today is one of those days where I am so down from feeling so awful I wonder how I will make it through the day.  

[[we...]]

whoop, you've been off a long time, how are you?  healed?

[[we...]]

right, I forgot the cry part.

[[Wh...]]

whoop, you've been off a long time, how are you?   healed?

 

Yes I am 26 months off 20 years of poly-drugging, it seems I am in protracted w/d because of that.  I still have nerve pain in back of head, neck and shoulders and cannot say I enjoy my thoughts much as they are so miserable and complaining about the pain all the time.  I still need this place to distract myself and to validate that I am in w/d.  I would say that I am 70% healed and expect that at this rate it may take another year or two to be healed completely.  I've come to accept that this is my lot for now and w/d is not all-consuming as it used to be.

 

I sleep really well now although that took quite abit of time to straighten out.  My days are much more active than yours are right now but rest assured that at 6 months I was just like you.  I don't understand why some people get off scot-free and why some have to suffer long and hard.  I'm sorry that you are still hurting so badly ... I know that 6 months seems like an incredibly long time to be ill like this.  I got here by doing this one day at a time and not worrying at all that this was permanent ... always, always kept the faith that I too would see the other side of this.

 

Julie ... I just feel that if I can survive this anyone can.  I have never regretted my decision to go off the drugs ... I know that this is the right thing to do as painful as it is.  By the way I have had 3 short windows and oh, my, how blissful to be relieved of the pain.  I am so looking forward to what my life will look like when I am released from the pain.  I know that there is much JOY ahead for me and you.

[[Pe...]]

So glad I read this thread.  I am now starting to feel like I am having a very normal 6 month lull! lol!!

[[Ho...]]

Whoopsie, I would send you a PM if I could - just want to tell you that I admire your spirit so much - 26 months off and still in w/d.  But you say it does not dominate your day all day long.  If I could just do that....I am 10.5 months off and so anxious to get better - I want my life back so badly.  As we all do.  I wish I could feel like you do and have total faith that I will heal....but I am having such a hard time these days.  Did you have deperssion during your w/d?  Were you able to do things or were you stuck at home on the couch?  I am happy that you have some of your life back....thanks for coming on here and keeping things lively - I have seen you in the new Chat room with the tea, etc.... I have totally lost my sense of humor through all this - I am just a sad, cranky person now.  Keep healing - my best to you Whoopsie.

Hoping2BFree

[[Wh...]]

Thank you for your well-wishes Hoping2Bfree!!    I understand that at 10.5 months off you are probably completely fed-up with this.  I've gone thru those periods too but somehow I keep managing to rally and come back to acceptance.  Some days were better coping days than others and you do tend to get exhausted also sometimes.  As far as having my life back ... well, I truly did not have much of a life while I was so drugged up anyways so I tend to look forward rather than back.  Actually that's not true either as I don't live in the future either as that is such an unknown and can fill me with fear if I go there too much.  Staying in today as been of paramount importance in getting thru this.

 

Amazingly I did not have depression until a couple months ago when my thyroid dose got screwed up either by the doc or the pharmacy and I took a real nose dive.  It was so bad that it scared the doc to see my hormone levels.  Anyways that was almost 2 months ago that that was caught and I am gradually getting out of that place ... thank heavens.

 

Don't worry ... I have had some very long, cranky spells too but so far haven't killed anyone.  :clap:

 

I'm heading out for a massage right now so have to wrap this up.  I also wish you continued healing and may you embrace the faith and promises that this too will pass.

[[mi...]]

whoop, you've been off a long time, how are you?   healed?

 

Yes I am 26 months off 20 years of poly-drugging, it seems I am in protracted w/d because of that.  I still have nerve pain in back of head, neck and shoulders and cannot say I enjoy my thoughts much as they are so miserable and complaining about the pain all the time.  I still need this place to distract myself and to validate that I am in w/d.  I would say that I am 70% healed and expect that at this rate it may take another year or two to be healed completely.  I've come to accept that this is my lot for now and w/d is not all-consuming as it used to be.

 

I sleep really well now although that took quite abit of time to straighten out.  My days are much more active than yours are right now but rest assured that at 6 months I was just like you.  I don't understand why some people get off scot-free and why some have to suffer long and hard.  I'm sorry that you are still hurting so badly ... I know that 6 months seems like an incredibly long time to be ill like this.  I got here by doing this one day at a time and not worrying at all that this was permanent ... always, always kept the faith that I too would see the other side of this.

 

Julie ... I just feel that if I can survive this anyone can.  I have never regretted my decision to go off the drugs ... I know that this is the right thing to do as painful as it is.  By the way I have had 3 short windows and oh, my, how blissful to be relieved of the pain.  I am so looking forward to what my life will look like when I am released from the pain.  I know that there is much JOY ahead for me and you.

 

Whoopsie hope you are getting more windows in your recovery.. You are a brave sweet woman.. You are alway's there for me as I will be for you... You keep going my friend... You will see light at the end of the tunnel.. I promise.

Luv,

Mishi