Buggin'--a couple of panics and some zaps/turkey sx at 0.25 K

[[ju...]]

Hi Any and All--

 

I took Mark's advice and didn't jump from 0.25 KLonopin to nothing--that would have been a bad deal indeed. Thought I was stable at 0.25; thought wrong. Within the last two weeks have had one big panic attack (small, hot room filled w/ 40+ people; had to leave) and some neck/head/arm zaps when contemplating talking to someone who now makes me nervous. (Was talking to this man after an AA meeting, and when it dawned on me that I was attracted to him, I grew silent and have remained so, exiting quickly, for three days. Not good.)

 

I know what AA hard-liners say--no 'entanglements' until the rather arbitrary figure of 1 year sober. I am close, if you're talking just numbers. Otherwise, not so much. Have always been comprehensively extra-shy, and now that I am coming OFF the benzos, having jettisoned almost everything else, I feel like the overweight bookworm I was in seventh grade. I know--lay off the man issue, and maybe the zaps will cease. HOWEVER,  dating is a part of life I never exactly mastered, and I'd go on and talk to this dude were the zaps not such a problem.

 

They have occurred in other settings, those in which I have tried to maintain eye contact w/ someone who was speaking to me. I immediately grew concerned if their effect was visible to the onlooker. No feedabck on that, but having them was a jolt. After about two weeks, thought they'd be done with by now. Insight v much appreciated. Thanx, jd