21 months out but no end

[[Sc...]]

What I'm feeling:

1. Severe restlessness and shortness of breath coupled with chest pain. 

2. Emotional numbness or not feeling the sense of normalcy. 

 

These things are taking a toll on me. 

[[Ho...]]

Hi @[Sc...], I'm close to your time frame. I'm 21 months too, just about. Have you made any changes lately? New supplement? Gone down on any AD or other meds?

I've been titrating down on mirtazepine and am at the point where I'm going at a snail's pace. Like dropping only .002 ml every ten days, because going any faster sent me into a wave. 

When you say taking s toll on you, OMGosh what a toll! I can relate. After almost two years of losing things; vacations, businesses, people, joy, a sense of accomplishment, any excitement about the future, yes. This has taken and continues to take a huge toll. I was ok today; worked out, hit the stores, came home and worked outside and suddenly felt sick and tired. Came in, started dinner and got slammed. I had to lay down I felt so sick to my stomach, jittery and anxious and dizzy. 

30 minutes later it was gone. Are you having waves and windows at all, or is yours a pretty steady rate? I'm guessing you have times when things are lighter than they are right now. It gets harder and harder to judge how we're feeling the longer this goes on. Month and a half ago I couldn't have told you if I had any windows. 

I was reading someone here wrote herself/himself letters when in a window, which were read during a wave. Something I"m thinking of doing; how about you?

My heart is with you. I want you better!

Warmly,

HCHC