Brutal depression

[[gu...]]

Going on month 4!! of this terrible setback at 7 years. It’s unbelievable. I keep thinking there must be something else wrong with me. It is relentless in a way withdrawal has never been before. Woke up today with absolutely brutal depression. Don’t know what to do with myself. This is alternating with feeling overwhelmed and broken down. No I didn’t take anything or do anything to bring this on, it just happened. How the hell long can this go on for??  Any compassion is appreciated.

[[Ma...]]

Sending compassion. Compassion and hope.

I don’t know what else I can offer. Are you open to a microdose of an antidepressant for a short period? You can take a gene test to see which works for your particular system.

What other symptoms are you experiencing?

I believe Matt Samet experienced a set back around 7 years off. You can read his story on Mad in America.

Edited May 5 by [Ma...]

[[Pi...]]

I had a pretty bad wave in January just before my 5-year mark that threw me for a bit of a loop. But overall I've practiced, and gotten fairly good at, acceptance of whatever comes because I know this process is erratic and can't be controlled. I don't want to waste my pittance of energy getting upset about the ups and downs, (though this is easier said than done sometimes for sure!) I have days or bits of days where I'm pretty fed up, but I just try not to get stuck there.

I also get feelings of depression during waves. I know it's not really 'me', it's the wave and most of the time I'm quite happy. I try not to take it too seriously. It's not who I am or even how I really feel, just an odd part of the process.

[[gu...]]

Picki you have a great attitude. My attitude would be better if this wasn’t dragging on and on and on… But thank you so much for your post.