REASSURANCE DESPERATELY NEEDED PLEASE

[[Pi...]]

I am 16 months off and my sxs haven’t lessened one bit, if anything they have intensified. I am so very very ill and completely terrified, I desperately need some hope. 

[[Br...]]

Hi @[Pi...] - I'm so sorry you're suffering.  This is a much rougher and slower path for some of us than others.  It's so hard to hold onto optimism when you feel so lousy.  Like you, I'm older and was terrified that I would never feel good again.   Like you I was tormented by horrible symptoms that made me feel miserable and desperate. I remember day after day where pushing through each hour took an act of will.  All I wanted in the world was for the day to end,  to crawl into bed and hopefully escape into the oblivion of sleep for a couple hours.  As the months passed by healing happened.  Often it was barely detectable. But slowly and in herky-jerky fashion,  it happened.  

Each person's body and brain heal at their own pace.  Meanwhile we need a toolbox of ways to cope with the wretched symptoms.  In my view, the number one technique for coping with symptoms is DISTRACTION.  (You may be tired of hearing this repeated!) You can get some relief by becoming involved in distracting activities like, tidying, household projects, crafts, puzzles, drawing/painting, funny TV shows, listening to music , etc. - anything that absorbs your attention so you stop focusing on your symptoms.  I'm a big fan of gentle walks in nature.  Even a walk around the block can help your sense of well-being.

Another big piece is being extra nurturing to yourself.  I made a nightly ritual of very warm Epsom salts baths with lavender essential oil by candlelight. It helped me relax before bedtime.  It was also soothing to have a ritual like this.

Have you found anything like this helpful?  It doesn't make this less of an ordeal but it helps make it at least a little more manageable to get through each day as you heal.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.  You've come so far and it has taken enormous strength.  I'm guessing you have been digging deep to find the strength to keep moving forward.  I believe you have tremendous strength.

[[Pi...]]

Thank you @[Br...] for taking the time to reply. I try to distract by watching TV as I’m couch bound and still unable to sleep for more than 90 mins, the nights are filled with as much horror as the days. I feel so overwhelmed that I just cry continuously and am just so frightened of never healing as I have yet to have a break in all this time. I worry that my body can’t survive this torture and I feel so alone.

[[Br...]]

Hi @[Pi...] -  I'm so sorry.  It can feel very, very lonely.   It's so good you found BB. You're among others here who understand what you're going through. I know it's very scary too. That's why it's so important to read Success Stories to see other who have been through this and gone on to recover.  Many of our members have felt very hopeless and in time, they recovered.  

When you feel up to it, would you please fill out your history with your medication history, taper details and any other pertinent information so others can provide the best feedback for your situation. 

Profile => Edit profile (top-right of profile banner) => Add succinct use/taper/withdrawal history to 'History' text box => click 'Save' (bottom-right).

 

 

 

 

[[Ra...]]

Pickle

I was on k for 32 years. I never thought I’d get better but I did. Keep up the hope. It will get a lot better. I’m at 28 mos now and things are so much better. Mine changed a lot at 16mos. It does change we just don’t know when. !!! Keep at it!!!

 

ranch

[[ba...]]

I'm just a few monthsbinto an estimated 8 months hopefully doc will Mae it longer taper. When the next cut is coming I worry. It is scary. Cardio helps as I eas so anxious today so ealked high speed invline for 35 minutes. Couple hours later I felt sleepy and clumsy. So I took a nap and have felt OK since. Also freezing cold showers are supposed to help. They do but I sometimes just don't bother.

I hate talking to people other than household but when my wife or brother or sister go out with me ...mall, park, anywhere I find I get distracted as stated by someone. But at home we get in our head and we ask for anxiety so it comes.

Idk I mean it's tough and sleep is tough but I'm hopeful plus it's my last chance so no choice

 I keep waiting for the end of my taper. I have noticed I can't laugh and every hour especially at home is anxiety. I eish i could sleep for longer.

Wish u all the best.