Reassurance please, please, please

[[Pi...]]

I am struggling beyond belief at 16 months off and am desperate, do we really heal - no horror stories please, I am way too fragile. Still can’t sleep, deafening tinnitus, panic, terror, head pressure, flashing lights, burning, tingling, weakness, pain and air hunger. How on earth do we survive this without our bodies giving out? Please help me.

[[...]]

@[Pi...], I have yet to start this process and i dont know what to say but I totally sympathise with you. Please hang in there. 🙏 

[[...]]

@[Pi...], so sorry for you! This experience of ours is sometimes beyond humanity and predictability. I don't know how to help but really feel for you and send all the hopeful rays i can.

Lots of people were the same place where you're atm and nevertheless live their normal life now. You will get there too, one day! Hope it won't take long.🌟

[[Ma...]]

The main thing is: the symptoms are not life-threatening. They are debilitating, yes. Terrible! It’s like our brains are fried and are working hard to get everything back into place. All we can do is nurture ourselves the best way possible en try to not ‘be’ the symptoms but ‘have’ the symptoms.

I’ve heard and read lot’s of stories of people having their lives back, although it may take some time. I really think you have the worst part behind you. 

In that situation you can’t see progress looking at days or weeks. But you may see progress in months or even a year. Hold on to that! 

You can do this! Why? Because you’re already doing this for quite some time now. And you’re still here. You may even have surprised yourself in this. Acknowledge that. Going day by day. 
 

🌸

[[Br...]]

@[Pi...] - this can be such a rough path. The symptoms can overwhelm us and make us discouraged.  You've come this far and I believe you'll keep pushing forward through each day.  A lot of us have found encouragement in Chapter III of The Ashton Manual.  

Dr. Ashton talks about many common symptoms, the reasons behind them and ways of coping.   (It includes most symptoms but not all of them - for instance, head pressure isn't on the list - but we know that head pressure is a real withdrawal symptom. I had it too.)  

 

[[Re...]]

@[Pi...] The human body is very strong.

The average healing time from benzo injury is 6-18 months for most people from what I understand. And six months is considered fast. I have seen the bulk of healing stories between 18 to 24 months on this site with many people reporting symptoms gone at three years and then they are those who are outliers and take 3-5. So you are well within a good estimated time window. Some people take longer, some heal overnight at 19 or 22 months who did not have a windows and waves pattern. You can’t make another person’s timeline your timeline though or let these numbers scare you. For all you know, your symptoms could start dropping off next week. 

As long as you are eating healthy organic foods, drinking enough quality water and avoiding additional chemicals in your body, you are doing everything you can to support healing. I am a little bit ahead of you at 19+ months off of the benzo but I also had to deal with the complication of an adverse reaction to Seroquel that was given for sleep. I hate the symptoms that I still have, but I cope with them.

My personal perspective is stay away from all pharmaceuticals and anything over-the-counter or herbal or anything that could put healing at risk. But some people choose to go in that direction. You just have to take things one day at a time and get the right social support—it’s all you can do.

Heat packs and ice packs have been a godsend for me when I need some relief. 
 

Edited April 17 by [Re...]

[[La...]]

I’m so sorry that you are going through a rough patch. I’d like to chime in just to give you a virtual hug 🤗 and to say that being in your timeframe, I had a rough patch too. It’s known as a milestone wave if you search the old archives. You’ll see that many around 16 months went through that and some at 2 years as well…I went through both of those. I kept reminding myself that it’s a push for healing and sure enough I did much healing when it lifted….it does lift! My baseline was better and I began tolerating walking and sitting up. Fine tuning isn’t fun! Please hang in there. Take one day at a time and if you can’t then take one hour at a time. I hope you get relief very soon. 
hugs 

[[ji...]]

i also have these symptoms, they're not constant,but when they are there its extreamly scary for me.  i just keep telling myself they will pass. i hope you begin to feel better soon~~jill

[[Pi...]]

I’m not very good with technology and so don’t know how to tag you and thank you personally for your messages but they mean a lot. I am on my own and terrified 24/7 by what is happening to me. I am so scared I won’t heal as I am older and the suffering has been relentless.  Thank you all so much 

[[Br...]]

@[Pi...] - Many older members have been through the process of benzo withdrawal and gone on to recover.  I was in my mid 60s when I quit.  It was a rough thing to go through, no question about it, but I healed. You've already gone through a lot a healing even though it may not feel like it. I agree with @[Ma...] says: "All we can do is nurture ourselves the best way possible en try to not ‘be’ the symptoms but ‘have’ the symptoms."  I believe taking good care of ourselves gives our body and brain the best conditions for healing and helps buoy our sense of well-being.  I'm a big fan of eating healthy foods, drinking plenty of water, getting the rest you can, moderate exercise out in nature every day, and calming practices like yoga and meditation. I know it can be hard to push through when you're being dragged down by symptoms but I believe all of the small ways you're able to take care of yourself will add up and help you feel a bit stronger.  

 

[[Pi...]]

Did it take you a long time to heal?

[[Br...]]

1 hour ago, [[P...] said:

Did it take you a long time to heal?

There was a lot of healing in the first year.  But there has been even more since.  It has been 4 1/2 years since I was put through a rapid taper.  I feel better and better as time passes.  I'm still sensitive to stress - it makes my anxiety rev up.  But compared to that first year of withdrawal I feel so much better. Remember, everyone's timeline for healing is different.  

I feel grateful every day for healing.  It takes incredible patience, acceptance, self compassion, and again, self care.  You'll get through this.

[[Pi...]]

May I ask if you were on a benzo for long?

Edited April 18 by [Pi...]

[[Re...]]

@[Pi...] I have a friend who was CT'd in her 60s and she is 100 percent back to health, working full-time, and benzo withdrawal is a thing of the past for her. She is ten years out now and doesn't have symptoms except some mild tinnitus every once in a while but she barely even notices it. She just got back from a European vacation. She is happy and healthy now.

[[Pi...]]

Wow! I was so so happy, healthy and happy before this and now I struggle to get through the day. Seems impossible to believe that I can survive and heal from this but I know I must believe those who have gone before me. 

[[Br...]]

20 hours ago, [[P...] said:

May I ask if you were on a benzo for long?

I took Ativan (lorazepam) off and on for 20 years and then switched to Klonopin (clonazepam) for a few months before I decided to quit.  I didn't have a clue about kindling or the nightmare that lay ahead with withdrawal.