Experiences on how were you once you got down to 1mg valium and below? Meaning were you functional

[[re...]]

I am nearing the 1 mg (Am at 1.10 currently) valium mark from 5 mg I started tapering in May and wondering what i have to look out for in the future as i get lower and lower. This is my second time around with a smart taper.  I know anyone can get hit at any time and all that. But wondering if I will get WORSE. This taper has not been easy and very trying at times with lots of symptoms, but has been somewhat doable meaning I have exercised pretty good throughout, kept a decent routine/etc.  I have been doing .02-.01 per day micro taper with mini holds throughout. I am still exercising and sleeping although very broken and heavy dream sleep. Decent amount of symptoms, but not housebound/bedbound yet and I am getting concerned with this last bit. I seem to have more normal days the lower I go. I have such a fear of seizures (have had some in June of 2022 in ER due to hyponatremia and delayed/botched medical care which got me in this mess) and also of becoming paralyzed for some reason. I know it is irrational, but I want to at least keep moving no matter how bad I feel. 

 

And it is so weird at this point. Like usually by late night (Midnight and after) I am somewhat symptom free or at least way lower in symptoms. It is only when I take the crap that I feel HORRIBLE a bit after I take it then also upon waking up. I sleep pretty broken then wake up to take the poison around 5-7 AM go back to bed and get maybe 2-3 hours of sleep only to wake up terribly again. When I keep  waking up from my short broken vivid dream sleeps before I take the benzo I feel way better. No symptoms hardly. So strange. 

Edited April 4 by [re...]
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[[Ka...]]

@[re...] your micro taper sounds like it’s all going in the right direction! As you may recall, I jumped at .5mg & it didn’t get worse for me at 1mg, or after. 

Keep on as you are moving ahead slowly & surely with an end in sight. I can’t comment on the seizure concern but your whole approach seems to me to be very careful & controlled. It’s really encouraging from the positives in your posts. 

[[re...]]

Thank you so much Katrina I appreciate that and that is good news you did not get worse. Did you micro taper or cut and hold once you got below 1mg? 

[[Ka...]]

No it wasn’t a micro taper. I did cut and n hold 1mg > reduced to 0.5mg for one month. Quite fast. Not ideal but I really needed to finish! 

[[re...]]

We are so alone in all this. Like we have been thrown to the wolves. They can give out all kinds of medicine, but if it has any kind of bad reaction at all they put it back on us like it is OUR fault. Such a sad state of affairs. 

[[re...]]

Wow you are so brave with a huge cut like that at the end. I give you BIG TIME credit for being able to do that. How were your symptoms for that 1 month .5mg hold?

[[Ka...]]

Thanks not brave really. It was weird getting towards the actual end after 5 years. 
yep. I couldn’t agree more it is a sad state of affairs. But I feel your mojo is returning.
And collectively we are supporting one another. 

[[re...]]

Well I consider you a warrior to go into unknown territory such at a lower dose and just cut like that down to .5 mg is amazing to me.

Makes me feel like a baby.   I would be so afraid. But I am sure after 5 years you were like "to hell with this I am  so over it and done" Lol

[[ac...]]

You and I  are on exactly the same path at the same time. I started in June and I am now almost at 1mg, down from 5mg. I am micro tapering on the same sort of flexible schedule that you have been. I've had some difficult days in the past few weeks so I have slowed down a bit. Looking forward to celebrating together.  

[[re...]]

Oh accjery so glad you are here. Welcome to the forum and my thread. Thank you for reaching out. Glad you are in the same boat as me with regards to timeline.  How have you been since you got down this low? What were you put on Diaz. for to begin with?

[[ac...]]

I was put on Diazapam several times over the past 5 years or so due to panic disorder. I only just figured out this last time how incredibly quick it gets hold of me. Only 2 months this time at 5mg and when I tried to taper to 4mg in one cut, it was hell on earth. What about you?   

[[re...]]

OMG ME TOO. I tried to taper from 5 to 4 pretty fast too like maybe two cuts within a couple weeks and WOW I was at home depot and the whole store seemed to be in a dream and I just kept walking around in a circle and couldn't remember where anything was when I knew this store pretty well (I am a contractor).

[[re...]]

If you can taper this last 1 mg and jump then NEVER go back on it again. What are your symptoms since you got down this low?

[[bu...]]

14 hours ago, [[K...] said:

@[re...] your micro taper sounds like it’s all going in the right direction! As you may recall, I jumped at .5mg & it didn’t get worse for me at 1mg, or after. 

Keep on as you are moving ahead slowly & surely with an end in sight. I can’t comment on the seizure concern but your whole approach seems to me to be very careful & controlled. It’s really encouraging from the positives in your posts. 

Hi Katrina, are you recovered? I like to read positive people's replies like yourself, as I can 't read all the negative stuff, as it makes my symptoms worse. Could you tell me more about your taper process and how it went if you have time?

[[Ka...]]

Hello @[bu...] it’s very wise not to read negative posts. We are all quite different so there is no one size fits all.  

Thank you for asking. A lot of people find a low dose taper particularly tricky. I was stuck & very keen to finish so I did so in the end fairly swiftly. I am fatigued but no worse finally off any form of benzo. Cautiously saying this & of course it’s early days! Taking it slow. I have underlying chronic fatigue alongside the benzo use as well as pre-existing PTSD. So I am letting my system rebalance. Interesting that these can be closely related. 
I think I saw you are finding things better & that is great - but go slow & steady. Be kind to yourself & take good care. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

[[bu...]]

51 minutes ago, [[K...] said:

Hello @[bu...] it’s very wise not to read negative posts. We are all quite different so there is no one size fits all.  

Thank you for asking. A lot of people find a low dose taper particularly tricky. I was stuck & very keen to finish so I did so in the end fairly swiftly. I am fatigued but no worse finally off any form of benzo. Cautiously saying this & of course it’s early days! Taking it slow. I have underlying chronic fatigue alongside the benzo use as well as pre-existing PTSD. So I am letting my system rebalance. Interesting that these can be closely related. 
I think I saw you are finding things better & that is great - but go slow & steady. Be kind to yourself & take good care. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

thanks katrina for the reply. im glad things are easier for you now. I want to give you hope that you can heal from CFS too, as I, too, have it and before the Benzo nightmare, I was almost healed from it using neuroplasticity tools from people like the Mindful Gardener, the Dare app, Alan Garden (tms) and somatic work. It's actually the same as withdrawal in ways; the NS is in fight-flight, and we get symptoms, but just cfs alone is easier to heal from than withdrawal as in withdrawal, we don't have much control. check out the mindful gardener. I know my symptoms are bad because I was already in a stressed state before it all happened, and then extra trauma all made my poor brain lose control.  ps i also had crps or burning skin before benzos and got rid of that too. we can heal, its just so blinking hard : 0

[[Ka...]]

Thank you that’s useful @[bu...] 

Apologies to @[re...] for highjacking topic somewhat - we find ourselves together in the benzo taper (& often other medications too) & shared experiences are important as we go thru this journey. Here’s to healing. 

[[re...]]

Bugbugtoby:

No no not necessary. I don't mind at all, but thank you for that. Where are you at right now for dose? How are you tapering? this is a rough ride. Yes do not look at horror stories. You never know what other meds they are on or how they're lifestyle is and how many doctors they are seeing that are making them worse. Yes I said it doctors WILL make you worse in this cause they will polydrug you and forget ever getting your life back. We are alone in this for the most part. 

[[bu...]]

when im better im going to slam down a thick load of paper on my docs desk with all the stories, recovery and others from here and tell him do some research. hes a very nice doctor, but clueless

[[re...]]

Good luck with that.

But I do hope your doctor does open up.  They really have a chip on their shoulders these days with patients. Surgeons of course are a different breed and skill set altogether so a big shout out to them. 

But the GP doesn't  seem to want to learn from their patient's issues and would rather keep their safe comfy job and home in the burbs and keep the mad wheel turning instead of stepping off for some critical thinking. I suppose I can understand that when you have a family, etc. But still bothers me regardless as i think doctors should pride themselves to a higher standard of practice and care.  It is amazing the tunnel vision most of them have in regards to medicine and the adverse reactions it can cause. 12 years of school doesn't always equate to well rounded intelligence. there are two kinds of smarts, street smarts and book smarts. We have looked highly upon and focused on the book kind WAY to long. And have forgotten the common sense street smart survival instinct kind. Say an asteroid hit tomorrow and it all got wiped out.

The street smart person would be more respected and much more in demand than the earned degree book smart person in a second. I think the balanced combo of both street and literature smarts beats them all. 

[[re...]]

But we have really pooh poohed the street smart, get your hands dirty, physical labor type. Instead we pedestalize  the higher formal educated and/or the grifting podcaster with lots of opinions and vast vocabulary. These people will be irrelevant if  it all crumbles and the SHTF.

I don't know about you, but I would pick the homeless (although sober and sane lol) type over the suburbanite with all these degrees every time if chaos hit. You would have a far better chance at survival learning and following them.

[[ac...]]

On 04/04/2024 at 16:51, [[r...] said:

OMG ME TOO. I tried to taper from 5 to 4 pretty fast too like maybe two cuts within a couple weeks and WOW I was at home depot and the whole store seemed to be in a dream and I just kept walking around in a circle and couldn't remember where anything was when I knew this store pretty well (I am a contractor).

How are you doing? I am currently down to .83 without too much struggle. 

[[re...]]

GOOD GOOD NEWS!!!!!!!!! Congrats!!!!!!!!

Thanks for reaching out acc. 

I am still functional at .95. It's tough and I am certainly not symptom free, but like today I did a 15 mile bike ride so I keep having hope. Some times I am getting less things  like the tinnitus, but other stuff comes in like I get these weird little red marks on my legs and just an overall feeling of tired and sickness, but it seems to lift at night and I feel ok for awhile. It seems to be wearing off very quick everyday at this low dose.  It is like the poison is getting out of me. So odd

Wow you are .12 under me. I can't wait to get there. 

What are you doing daily like .02? I am doing .01 per day this low but thinking about some .02 daily for a bit and see how I feel. 

Edited April 16 by [re...]
spelling error

[[Do...]]

On 05/04/2024 at 00:51, [[r...] said:

OMG ME TOO. I tried to taper from 5 to 4 pretty fast too like maybe two cuts within a couple weeks and WOW I was at home depot and the whole store seemed to be in a dream and I just kept walking around in a circle and couldn't remember where anything was when I knew this store pretty well (I am a contractor).

Hi there,

My case is just the opposite. I was having 5mg, half of the tablet, 2.5mg every 12 hours, then i got 2mg tablets so i decided to substitute my doses with these and i started a 2mg tablet evey 12 hours, thats 1mg cut and the truth is that i didnt feel any symptoms, in fact i would say i got a very nice window for a few days.

Nevertheless, i have only been able to reduce 0.28mg in almost a month and that includes a big failure on my last cut wich i had to abort and go back to 2mg dose and switching to liquid micro tapering  only being able to reduce 0.14mg each dose, total of 0.28mg.

Despite going so slow is being hard as hell to advance at this first tapers.

Still trying to find a rate where i can feel confortable and functional.

 

Edited April 16 by [Do...]