6 days off and feeling better.

[[PE...]]

I done every benzo there is the last 8 year. Tapering and going ct started again etc. My tolerance is so high my last dose 6 days ago was 30 1mg xanax and ten 10mg diazepam. I been withdrawaling hard while on mega doses. I lost 6kg because i vomited almost every day since december. The only effect i got was a warm feeling in my head and i stopped shaking and vomiting. I got medicine for Nassau on script but it didn't work. How come i feel better when not taking any benzo!?? 

I think I tapered to long. I was down to 2.5mg around December and should had jump then but something psychological made me keep on. 

Now no Nassau for 4 days and i can eat and go to the gym.

I know diazepam withdrawal can take time but before my relapse on 30 xanax and ten diazipam i was on 5mg diazepam a day.

I'm waiting for it to start again but i get better by the day!

I had every symptom there is. All of them! Cascade vomiting and Nassau was the worst. Mom called the ambulance a couple of months ago i was so weak and dehydrated i needed to get water from IV. 

I haven't felt this good since I started taper, with a couple of relapses, for a year or so.

So if I'm not starting withdrawal bad again i won't touch this devil drug ever again. 

I have a mix of anxiety and restlessness but it's doable. My sweat attacks and vomit is gone so i have hope.

Best from Sweden

Edited July 26, 2023 by Guest
Wrote about selfharm

[[Pa...]]

Hello peppe from sweden, welcome to BenzoBuddies,

You've had a rough journey, benzodiazepines are very unforgiving once they turn on us so I'm glad to see you're making progress.  How are you feeling today, have your symptoms increased?  Our symptoms even in recovery can wax and wane so don't be surprised if things get worse before they get better. 

You'll find members here who share your distressful symptoms so I hope you can take comfort in this shared misery but the key is hope, we must have it as we travel through this nightmare.

Again, welcome, we're glad you're here.

Pamster

[[PE...]]

Thanks Pampster. Benzos should really be banned! 

I'm like yesterday, shaking a bit and have those ants crawling on my body. Anxiety and stressed of course. But at this point i can handle it. I take it day by day. I decided to CT because after about a year with withdrawal still on high doses my stamina is running out. If I get that seizure feeling i have pills left.

Greatings from Sweden 

[[PE...]]

Just had a powerwalk in the woods working up a sweat. Nassau is present a bit but i will force myself to eat something.

 

 

[[be...]]

Wanted to reply on this cause my history sounds pretty much same except the highest doses where 20mg Xanax on worst days. I used 12 years. CT too many times. And I'm feeling little bit better than last week I can't sleep well but still. I did pretty fast taper 3month. 

Edit and I hav that problem too with if I had extra pills on very bad moment but I check in daily clinic where I get them so risk was very low except weekends.

Greetings from Finland neighbor!

Edited Monday at 12:06 by [be...]

[[PE...]]

42 minutes ago, [[b...] said:

Wanted to reply on this cause my history sounds pretty much same except the highest doses where 20mg Xanax on worst days. I used 12 years. CT too many times. And I'm feeling little bit better than last week I can't sleep well but still. I did pretty fast taper 3month. 

Edit and I hav that problem too with if I had extra pills on very bad moment but I check in daily clinic where I get them so risk was very low except weekends.

Greetings from Finland neighbor!

Hi there neighbour 😁

I wouldn't had been able to stop if i hadn't flushed them down.

It had me in a tight grip for sure. Omg this post brings back awful memories I'm out of here.

😬

[[De...]]

Congratulation on jump Peppe! 
you can do it💪

[[PE...]]

7 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

Congratulation on jump Peppe! 
you can do it💪

Thanks I did this is a year old 🤩😁

[[De...]]

Hahahahahahahahaha you know i was wondering about this. I was thinking you are 8 month off. And today i saw this. So i was thinking you were tapering 8 month 👌 

😂😂😂

[[PE...]]

5 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

Hahahahahahahahaha you know i was wondering about this. I was thinking you are 8 month off. And today i saw this. So i was thinking you were tapering 8 month 👌 

😂😂😂

Yes it was a good dig up 😆

[[...]]

@[PE...]I can relate to that as I been using on and of for 12 years myself CT is horrible the first time but was nothing like I imagined 2nd time round thought I was going to die I must have gotten every single symptom I was on 60mg a day of Ds with help cut to 20mg and was left hanging, in which I told my story ended bk in hospital only to be re introduce to the toxic drug again now I month later I again am going through WD this is hell I'm 6 days in and getting nearly all again 

[[De...]]

@[PE...] did you really felt better after jump then during tapering? How torturouse that tapering experience was 🫣

[[PE...]]

8 minutes ago, [[D...] said:

@[PE...] did you really felt better after jump then during tapering? How torturouse that tapering experience was 🫣

Yes it was messy.. 

Not at once but after a few weeks. It was worth it..

 

[[da...]]

I honestly get joy when i see one of us get a window or make any progress. Thanks for sharing

[[PE...]]

4 minutes ago, [[d...] said:

I honestly get joy when i see one of us get a window or make any progress. Thanks for sharing

It's one year old @[da...]. But so far so good 😊

[[da...]]

18 minutes ago, [[P...] said:

It's one year old @[da...]. But so far so good 😊

Lol my bad. Then im sure you’re nearly healed

[[PE...]]

13 minutes ago, [[d...] said:

Lol my bad. Then im sure you’re nearly healed

80% i say 😊

[[De...]]

What are your simptoms peppe now?

[[Cr...]]

4 hours ago, [[P...] said:

Hi there neighbour 😁

I wouldn't had been able to stop if i hadn't flushed them down.

It had me in a tight grip for sure. Omg this post brings back awful memories I'm out of here.

😬

I thought the Fins and Swedes weren't supposed to get along! Or am I thinking of Norwegians? 

[[in...]]

Jeeeesus Christ @[PE...] I was scared looking in to this post because I thought you relapsed! Now I can breathe again. Man it feels good to know you're ok! *Taking deep and slow breaths*! Wooow....

 

[[PE...]]

10 hours ago, [[C...] said:

I thought the Fins and Swedes weren't supposed to get along! Or am I thinking of Norwegians? 

No fins and swedes are like brothers. We have lots of fins in sweden..

[[PE...]]

11 hours ago, [[D...] said:

What are your simptoms peppe now?

Some insomnia but right now ok.. 

Some light anxiety when i wake up. And very light tinnitus. 

The overall feeling can be vaguely hangover sometimes. I had this the whole time. But much better 

[[in...]]

2 hours ago, [[P...] said:

Some insomnia but right now ok.. 

Some light anxiety when i wake up. And very light tinnitus. 

The overall feeling can be vaguely hangover sometimes. I had this the whole time. But much better 

That's exactly how I feel every day! It feels like I drank 1L of heavy alcohol the night before even though I've been sober for many years! Other than that I kind of feel ok! Except for the back pain.

[[PE...]]

15 minutes ago, [[i...] said:

That's exactly how I feel every day! It feels like I drank 1L of heavy alcohol the night before even though I've been sober for many years! Other than that I kind of feel ok! Except for the back pain.

Yeah it's a classic symptom. My brain feels never completely rested. But if it was 1L of vodka before it's down to a glass of wine now so it's getting better.

[[De...]]

1 hour ago, [[P...] said:

Yeah it's a classic symptom. My brain feels never completely rested. But if it was 1L of vodka before it's down to a glass of wine now so it's getting better.

Did you have this from begining? Because i just now starting to have it. Its very dificult for me to be functional in morning. I have to drink more coffee for my brain to start working. Even people around me noticed this change 🙄 i mean i can live with that 😂 its better that horor morning waking up in 4 clock in morning in sweets And cortisol rushed. 👌 i guess this is more natural feeling 👀