Why does no one get it when I say my brakes are literally broken

[[Co...]]

Friends of my parents visited and they are concerned and then said like she needs a psychiatrist to help her because she is soooo like emotional outburst, she has no brake aymore. And to see if she can taper faster with other meds or something. But my parents KNOW I cannot and now my dad is again saying how do you know, why do you think you know better again, and I'm like well unfortunately I knew everything better, it shouldn't be this way. They have spoken with Geraldine Burns only a few days ago. I really don't understand why people cannot get it. They lived like this too since October. Only now this month my dad is starting to realize cortisone already did something with me. For someone so slow and stupid he definitely rushed us fast to that doctor and onto this for no reason but me crying and being confused cause I was not sleeping wemm but still so active. I shouldn't have been open then about how I felt. Then this would have never happened. It is the most lonely thing in the world isn't it. I give up. I lovk myself away in my room as much as I can. They get angry all I do is eat and go away again without having a conversation but I cannot keep justifying a slow taper and explaining the having no brakes anymore over and over again for them to finally start getting it when I'm dead. Ugh. Rant over.

[[Ha...]]

They don’t or can’t understand but we do and you are one brave human to go through this. Hang in there.

Hardy x

[[Re...]]

Friends of my parents visited and they are concerned and then said like she needs a psychiatrist to help her because she is soooo like emotional outburst, she has no brake aymore. And to see if she can taper faster with other meds or something. But my parents KNOW I cannot and now my dad is again saying how do you know, why do you think you know better again, and I'm like well unfortunately I knew everything better, it shouldn't be this way. They have spoken with Geraldine Burns only a few days ago. I really don't understand why people cannot get it. They lived like this too since October. Only now this month my dad is starting to realize cortisone already did something with me. For someone so slow and stupid he definitely rushed us fast to that doctor and onto this for no reason but me crying and being confused cause I was not sleeping wemm but still so active. I shouldn't have been open then about how I felt. Then this would have never happened. It is the most lonely thing in the world isn't it. I give up. I lovk myself away in my room as much as I can. They get angry all I do is eat and go away again without having a conversation but I cannot keep justifying a slow taper and explaining the having no brakes anymore over and over again for them to finally start getting it when I'm dead. Ugh. Rant over.

 

I hear you. I dealt with some toxic positivity today from someone who doesn't get it. It is all so lonely. After eight months my doctors and friends finally all understand. I shared a lot of information with them over time. And just kept to my guns.

[[Co...]]

I do too. I have made my parents watch and read everything. I have had my dad listen to @Witt-Doerring and Christy Huff (he didn't like what she had to say). I have set up meetings with Angela Peacock and Geraldine Burns qnd this neuroscientist. And still it goes on and on.

[[Du...]]

Wat is their advice other than to hold on?

[[Re...]]

I do too. I have made my parents watch and read everything. I have had my dad listen to @Witt-Doerring and Christy Huff (he didn't like what she had to say). I have set up meetings with Angela Peacock and Geraldine Burns qnd this neuroscientist. And still it goes on and on.

 

Unfortunately, it is just the process because there isn't information on this in mainstream society yet. So you have to keep hammering the nail and hammering the nail and hammering the nail until they get it.

[[Co...]]

Wat is their advice other than to hold on?

 

This is not even about that. It is to make them understand I don't choose to be without brakes and that I need to taper slow.

[[Re...]]

Wat is their advice other than to hold on?

 

This is not even about that. It is to make them understand I don't choose to be without brakes and that I need to taper slow.

 

Some people cannot taper slowly if they have a medical emergency or severe tolerance issues. So it doesn't work for everyone, and there isn't one way. But if you are tolerating your symptoms and slow tapering, that is a different story.

[[Co...]]

I can taper slow. I'm going to taper slow. I mean that everyone here is of the opinion I need to get off this drug asap and that a psychiatrist can help me and get me off faster by giving me other meds. It's not how it works. At least not for me.

[[Co...]]

My sister is visiting and within the first 5 min she called me a dramaqueen and laughed in my face. I hate my family. I left. This is not normal behaviour of them. Do you also feel like the entire world is crazy but then I'm the one on drugs? Honestly I'm still more respectful and make more sense than they all do. It is abysmal. Or whatever that English word is.

[[ia...]]

I can taper slow. I'm going to taper slow. I mean that everyone here is of the opinion I need to get off this drug asap and that a psychiatrist can help me and get me off faster by giving me other meds. It's not how it works. At least not for me.

 

I can relate to this SO much. MY mom constantly asks, 'Where are you at with the taper? How's the taper going? Are you getting close?" I literally say to her: "Do you WANT me functional? Or do you NOT want me functional? Do you want me to  be able to contribute to the family business and takeover? Or not?" Like... PLEASE.... I'm going as FAST AS I CAN, without having a nervous breakdown.

 

WE UNDERSTAND... We are here to support you.

[[Co...]]

Thank you 

[[Bo...]]

So much yes with my family and it’s gotten better as they’ve read and listened to De Witt-Doerring videos and talked to Jennifer Leigh. Think they didn’t want to accept that I was one that got bit by these things but now have started to realize. It takes a toll on our loved ones too bc they want to change the misery for us and can’t so sometimes they start having some issues themselves. So just try to ask for grace and give them a little grace when they get easily frustrated. I would get very angry at my family and had sent them so much info but it overwhelmed them and well, they are also people. My mom started having panic attacks having never had any in 70yrs when this happened to me so just as hard as it is try to bring yourself down some snd maybe text a note instead of speaking of that’s too easy to get more worked up or write a short note asking to hang in there with you and please k or you’re trying your hardest to get thru this but need their support when they are able to give their energy and time bc this is a chemical brain injury (that heals!!), but you need some help with basic things or alleviate some stress bc any stress makes everything much harder.

 

Sending hugs y’all’s way and hoping things improve bc I know how hard it gets. Also want to say we feel emotions so much stronger in all of this for the exact reason you’re discussing, and so it’s more hurtful or tough and I’ve noticed I now don’t get so hurt by things anymore. And if I do it’s always around my cycle related stronger irritability and crying etc, so I read the note I wrote myself awhile back that I will come out of yhe darkness and hell, bc each time I do gain a bit of ‘okayness’ and darkness lifts, si it will again.

 

Hang in there!!!! Keep asking for grace and to not be given up on by family and friends…. I kept reiterating this with mine. It takes a toll and hard for us to express/explain how we want to.