Anybody who has experienced tolerance w/d

[[no...]]

Had my appt with dr yesterday and told him I was going to start tapering off my .25 k. He said emphatically that the extreme anxiety and dep , agitation I was feeling could not possibly be due to anything but my own increasing anxiety, that a mere.25 k (3yrs, 2 tries at being off) could iin fact not be working, and that was indeed tolerance, but the idea that I could have added withdrawal symptoms is untrue.

I continue to go to work each day, deal with life problems, travel for work...all that regular stuff, but am constantly pushing to do it through irrational fear and constant thoughts of "I can't",

Just hoping someone has some thoughts or experience with this tolerance process, needing some wisdom from someone who has been there as I make my plan.

Thanks - Susan

[[...]]

Hi Susan,

 

I was given a prescription for Ativan and told to "take as needed", by following that bad advice, I was in tolerance withdrawal for two years. I didn't know what was happening, all I know is that l felt so lousy for those 2 years. I thought I had all these diseases, my anxiety was through the roof, and I would be terribly agitated.

 

I can't offer you any advice on tapering, I got mad at my Doctor{now X Doctor) and went cold turkey, I don't advise that.

 

Sometimes we have to do things that we feel, in our 'gut', is the right thing to do.

 

pj

 

 

[[Be...]]

I can tell you this much, Susan.  I have felt WAY less anxiety off ativan/lorazepam than I felt while I was in tolerance withdrawal.  I did do a lot of thinks to manage that anxiety by using a lot of the tips and techniques from the Anxiety Board.  I also found Claire Weekes' "Help and Hope for Your Nerves" very helpful and worked hard on changing my thoughts about what was happening.  I figured that even though I had limited control over the effects of benzo tapering, I could chose to think more helpful and positive thoughts.  Since you are already aware that you are having unhelpful thoughts (eg "I can't"), you have taken the first step. 

[Guest [Si...]]

Susan,

 

I'm tapering and honestly, I feel much better than I did on higher doses. I was in tolerance for a long time. My mind became foggy, couldn't concentrate nor do much of anything. I felt more anxious, depressed. The more I taper in my case, yes I have withdrawal, but feel better as I taper. Sometimes we break tolerance by tapering. Best to get off the Benzo, and press on. It's not easy, but it can be managed. Like Beeper, I feel less anxious. Sometimes the Benzo can have a paradoxical effect on us, to where instead of the Benzo helping the problem.. it creates what it's used for.

 

 

S#

 

 

[[Wi...]]

Klonopin has made me feel those same feelings of "I can't do it" the entire 7 months I've been on it

Now i am tapering.  It is rough, but I felt like crap on my full dose also.  Even though I am dealing with withdrawal I am losing some of those feelings of helplessness......like everything is a struggle.  You are on a pretty low dose.  I would be psyched if I was taking such a low dose because the taper could be done fairly quickly.

[[Pe...]]

 

Hi Susan,

 

Most doctors do not know about tolerance w/d while you are on benzos.  I had a whole myriad of misdiagnoses from assorted Drs and specialists until I finally figured out on my own that all of my symptoms were from tolerance w/d.

 

I know what you mean about the constant thoughts of "I can't".  It is like a wall made up of 'overwhelmed feeling' bricks goes up when you even think about doing an everyday task and you feel frozen, like you just simply can't do it.

 

I got it first when I was on Xanax, and then the same when they switched it to Ativan.  It never left me until I was finally off benzos.  I am in w/d now and still have it on and off, but now I get periods where it is gone, for the first time in many many years.

 

My Doctor did however know one thing, that benzos are prescribed to relieve anxiety, but can also have the opposite effect and cause anxiety.  He was right.  I never had fits of rage or panic attacks until I had taken benzos either.

 

If you have any questions about tolerance w/d I would be more than happy to try to help.

[[no...]]

Whew! What a relief to come home after a long day punctuated by a few stabs of panic and general uneasiness- to find these responses. I thank each of you for your input. I know that my time with benzos has run its course, and everyone here has helped me feel better about starting down the "Taper trail" once more. I never had a problem with earlier stints on Klonopin- in the 90's took it a couple months and just tapered quite quickly- no problem. Again for a year in 2002- eased off and was more or less ok. But this go round- not so much.

The worst thing, aside from the anx- I kind of always have this feeling of sadness and like I could cry.Not something I have had before- could that be the tolerance w/d too?

Gonna go get me a pill cutter, guys- Susan

[[Pe...]]

For me the sadness/wanting to cry was a part of it too.

[[no...]]

I am sorry you experienced it Perseverance- thanks for letting me know I am not alone. All this makes working and dealing with life SOO hard. Hard to keep it unbder wraps. So- did you have just general overwhelming fear at times as well? It so irrational, yet string.-Susan

[[Pe...]]

Yes.  Toward the end while I was still benzos my fear was intense.  I started begging my husband not to go to work.  How irrational is that?  Then for the first two months of my w/d I was afraid of EVERYTHING.  Severe paranoid thoughts over nothing.

 

Early on when my tolerance w/d started I started getting paranoid of being around people and going places.  Year by year I left home less and less often.  In the end I became homebound.

 

Benzos steal your life from you so slowly most people never make the connection to the drug.  They end up going to Psychiatrists and other medical professionals who will happily pile on more drugs and give you quazi diagnoses.  That was the case for me too.

[[no...]]

How did you overcome being housebound, or did it ease up when the w/d ended?

Thats such a big hurdle to overcome. I have my fear wherever I go- I usually leave home to try and "outrun" it or distract myself...like shopping..problem is my fear is bigger than my bank account.

[[Pe...]]

I am still in w/d and still homebound unfortunately.  But the good news is I am not homebound from mental sx's anymore, it's the physical ones that are keeping me here now.

 

I feel bad you have to work with this.  I am so very blessed that we could survive on my husband's income.  It is a struggle, I know.

[[no...]]

I don't do well at home- I need to be distracted and engaged or I get too 'internalized" and withdrawn. I guess I just can forget some about myself...but often I am thinking there's no way I can stand another second and will have to leave work.

I never do- its just this head trip my anxiety likes to play with me.

Its summer- I am not so busy, probably best to start the taper now, as come fall I have grad school and a new job there. EEEEK.

Had a wheel fall off my car yesterday as I was coming home from a road trip, just missed total wipeout of me and my car...

this has me thinking in regards to benzos, here I am fretting whats to come in w/d....but you never really know what is in store, and time is short.-S