Really messed things up

[[Al...]]

Id been focusing on tapering X and have been successful.  However,  I had a few nights of bad bad tinnitus and updosed the 30 mg Tem.  Now Im going to be short by about 8 pill before my next refill.  I see my University resident psychiatrist and I dont know what to say.  If I admit noncompliance won't she cut me off?  Demand inpatient detox? Should I just try to taper the 8 pills I have left and not say anything>  I am so afraid and freaking of the alternatives? I cannot go inpatient. Advice?

[[sh...]]

I was short about 3 days worth of pills last month.  I texted my doctor and told him the truth - which was that as I was filling my pill container for the week, I noticed I was short and going to run out before my refill.  I stressed that I was diligent with taking my meds as prescribed and can only attribute it to theft by the parade of college kids my son had visiting me during the month.  I asked him to call send a note to the pharmacy for a one-time early refill, which he did and they filled it early.  Note:  I have been seeing this psych for 20 years, it has never happened before, the story about my son's friends is true. 

 

I also was FREAKING OUT!  I knew that since this was a one off situation, the psych would believe me and help me.  I was afraid he was on vacation and I wouldn't be able to get ahold of him, but it all worked out (and I hide my meds now).

 

My advice is to get on top of the situation by placing a call to your doctor and letting them know your predicament. 

 

FINALLY - I don't know what country you're in, but in the US a doctor cannot just cut off your care knowing that you are on a medication that can't be withdrawn abruptly. That is patient abandonment and he/she could lose their license. Also, you can't be forced into detox - inpatient or out.  Worse case scenario go to the ER when you run out.  But, I bet it won't come to that.

 

 

[[Al...]]

Thank you for that.  Id hate to go to the ER but I would if necessary.  I had fallen and bruised my knees badly on cement walkway while walking my dog.  I wanted to keep my X on taper schedule but with Tinnitus out of control I took rescue doses resulting in running out in a week.  I did message my MD and Ive been stressing about it.  Your words of reassurance help me calm down.  Im already at tolerance so I have to be more careful.

 

Peace,

[[sh...]]

My incident of running out a couple of days before refill is what prompted me to start getting off these meds.  I do not ever want to be in that situation again.  This is why I am NOT telling my doctor that I am tapering and am saving all my dry cuts.  I want to have an abundance on hand, so I am not shackled to refill day.  I travel for a living and started planning my work schedule around my drug pick up days.  Living like that is ridiculous!  I have only been tapering less than a month, but have been able to accumulate 5 extra pills.  If I continue this, I should have an abundance in a few months and will not have to ever face "running short" again or scheduling my life around my Klonopin prescription pick up days.  I will keep getting my monthly script for original amount and hoard the excess to ward off these occasions.  I want to be in control of my taper, not the doctor who got me hooked.

 

I wish you the best of luck.

 

 

 

 

[[Al...]]

I was doing that w X.  I have extra but would it substitute for Tem I wonder?  Good strategy tho.

[[sh...]]

I think so!  If you look at a Benzo equivalency chart Xanax ~ Temezepam,  do you have enough x to get you through to tem refill day? It may not be a perfect ride, but it will certainly take the edge off of w/d and prevent seizures taking the equivalent amount of Xanax.  That might be your solution.

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

I think some of the BenzoBuddies have given you good advice. However, as I suffer from tinnitus myself, which led to insomnia and Benzos, I wonder how and if you cope with that.

 

It took me many years, but I ended up at a clinic specialized in tinnittus and learned how to cope. For me a step in willing to come off the Benzos, was my ability to cope with my tinnitus.

 

Benzos don't take away an underlying issue. In fact, they make it worse. In my withdrawal my tinnitus gets worse sometimes.

 

Like Benzodiazepine withdrawal, tinnitus can be misunderstood. If you need help, let me know.

 

Stay strong and best of luck and love.

 

[wquote author=Alycat link=topic=270132.msg3391707#msg3391707 date=1658943785]

Id been focusing on tapering X and have been successful.  However,  I had a few nights of bad bad tinnitus and updosed the 30 mg Tem.  Now Im going to be short by about 8 pill before my next refill.  I see my University resident psychiatrist and I dont know what to say.  If I admit noncompliance won't she cut me off?  Demand inpatient detox? Should I just try to taper the 8 pills I have left and not say anything>  I am so afraid and freaking of the alternatives? I cannot go inpatient. Advice?

[[Al...]]

My Tinnitus came out of the blue, or so I thought.  I was under tremendous stress with my mom in Hospice care and she had contracted Covid.  She was 97 years old and fragile.  Her money had run out and I was under the gun trying to get Medicaid for her.  Anyway .....  I was also on Tem and X to cope for years.

 

Right now Im using sound therapy and YouTube relaxation videos, CBT therapy etc.  Its not really helping a lot but Im functioning.  I ordered sound conduction headphone but haven't tried them yet.  I purchased the Apollo Neuro but the jury is out on that.  My hope is that healing from Benzos will help some with habituation.  If you have any suggestions, Im all ears ....

 

Peace.

[Guest [Na...]]

I've gotten education at the clinic. Understanding what tinnitus is helped a lot: not an ear issue, but a neurlogical condition caused by trauma (stress, illness etc.).

 

CBT did the trick for me. At least amount of stress helps for me and a good nights rest. Panic and stress worsen my tinnitus, so I've decided to avoid drama in my life where I can.

 

Oh and this excercise: listing to an audio of your tinnitus. My tinnitus is loud 8000hz. tone.

 

I can definitely tell the difference between my tinnitus and the Benzo induced one. I find solice the Benzo induced one will pass.

 

Somewhat funny when I play it to people they beg me to turn it off and for me it's like "But I hear this all day, so it doens't affect me anymore".

 

My Tinnitus came out of the blue, or so I thought.  I was under tremendous stress with my mom in Hospice care and she had contracted Covid.  She was 97 years old and fragile.  Her money had run out and I was under the gun trying to get Medicaid for her.  Anyway .....  I was also on Tem and X to cope for years.

 

Right now Im using sound therapy and YouTube relaxation videos, CBT therapy etc.  Its not really helping a lot but Im functioning.  I ordered sound conduction headphone but haven't tried them yet.  I purchased the Apollo Neuro but the jury is out on that.  My hope is that healing from Benzos will help some with habituation.  If you have any suggestions, Im all ears ....

 

Peace.

[[Al...]]

My tinnitus is also high.  8000 k

[[sh...]]

Alycat- what ever happened?  Did you get an early refill or did you white knuckle it?

[[Al...]]

The Psych Resident switched me to the Ashton Method so I actually didnt come up short.  Im adhering to it quite strictly.  It actually worries me more than the tinnitus, fearing what will happen in the future with the long schedule ahead of me.  Tinnitus comes and goes.  I see a CBT therapist but I dont think its helping a lot bc he doest understand Benzo WD.

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

what do you mean by switching to the Ashton Method? Are you crossing over to Diazepam?

 

It's sad, but only people who have gone through Benzodiazepine withdrawal can understand how you feel. Are you sleeping well? I can deal with everything much better, including tinnitus, if I sleep well.

 

Naf1983

 

The Psych Resident switched me to the Ashton Method so I actually didnt come up short.  Im adhering to it quite strictly.  It actually worries me more than the tinnitus, fearing what will happen in the future with the long schedule ahead of me.  Tinnitus comes and goes.  I see a CBT therapist but I dont think its helping a lot bc he doest understand Benzo WD.

[[Al...]]

Not sleeping well,  reflux/nausea, depression ….  Not doing well with the switch. 

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

am I reading this correctly in your signature?

 

8.4.22  .25 X @ 5p, 15 mg Tem & 5 Val, .125X

 

You are taking 0.25mg. of Alprazolam (Xanax), 15mg. of Temazepam and 5mg. Diazepam (Valium)?

 

 

Not sleeping well,  reflux/nausea, depression ….  Not doing well with the switch.

[[Al...]]

I spread out the doses of Xanax to counter WD symptoms (tingles and tinnitus) but it hasn't helped much.  Im breaking up pieces of a .5 tablet.  That is in addition to the taper schedule the psych resident put me on.  It seems like she didnt figure X into the WD taper at all so I feel like Im way worse than when I started all this.  I take .125 x at 5 pm,  .125 x at around 2 am then .125 x at noon.  At the hour of sleep I take the tapering dose of Tem and Valium.  I have no idea which med is causing the symptoms.  Why am I better in the afternoon until around 5 pm?

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

the best remedy, if any, is to stabilize the Benzodiazepines in your blood. The fact that you are using three different Benzodiazepines simultaneously can be very distressing to your nervous system, because they each differ in potency and halflife. I take it your prescriber isn't aware that you're using a Benzo next to the ones he/she is thinking you are taking. Also you take Benzos at different times, which will cause spikes and drops during the day.

 

I never converted, but I can imagine it can be extremely difficult. I think that when/if you completly crossover to Diazepam (Valium), these extreme symptoms will fade.

 

15 miligrams of Temazepam is equal to 7.5mg. Diazapam, if I am correct. I've not yet heard a story as yours where someone is, during a crossover, taking additional Benzos. I totally understand this process is extremely hard and can leave us hopeless and don't know what to do.

 

However, this is my advice to you: try to crossover from one Benzo to another. If you feel you can't, it's not the end of the world to reinstate just one Benzo in order to stabilize and then consider a second try to crossover. But three Benzos will just mess you up further.

 

Another option is you switch your Temazepam for Diazepam, considering the potency you are using. In any case, one Benzo is ideal for tapering. Two Benzos happens usually only during crossing over.

 

This is my experience by just tapering from one Benzo (Diazepam): too rapid withdrawal or different blood levels of Benzodiazepines will cause intense symptoms, including severe tinnitus. The way to no or almost no symptoms is achieved by stabile bloodlevels.

 

Best of luck. You are not alone in this. Be safe.

Naf1983

 

I spread out the doses of Xanax to counter WD symptoms (tingles and tinnitus) but it hasn't helped much.  Im breaking up pieces of a .5 tablet.  That is in addition to the taper schedule the psych resident put me on.  It seems like she didnt figure X into the WD taper at all so I feel like Im way worse than when I started all this.  I take .125 x at 5 pm,  .125 x at around 2 am then .125 x at noon.  At the hour of sleep I take the tapering dose of Tem and Valium.  I have no idea which med is causing the symptoms.  Why am I better in the afternoon until around 5 pm?

[[Al...]]

My Psych (Resident at Uni). knows about all my meds.  She says we will taper the X after successful crossover from Temazepam to Valium.  I thought the Valium would be sedating enough that I could taper the X along with the tem but nope, too many symptoms.  Does V accumulate in your system after a week or so and become more effective?

 

Peace

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

yes, Valium takes a while to build up in your blood also to disappear; the long halflife is more suitable for withdrawal.

 

I'm hearing you say you are hoping for a sedating effect. Benzos are tranquilizers, but when we go in withdrawal, the oppisite happens: our brains will be fired up.

 

If sleep is really a problem, you could ask for an antihistamine. For more information you can check the Ashton Manual. However, like I said before, stabilizing should lessen the agony.

 

The time it takes for our brains and body to adapt to Benzo changes can be frustrating, I know, but give it time.

 

Best of luck,

Naf1983

 

My Psych (Resident at Uni). knows about all my meds.  She says we will taper the X after successful crossover from Temazepam to Valium.  I thought the Valium would be sedating enough that I could taper the X along with the tem but nope, too many symptoms.  Does V accumulate in your system after a week or so and become more effective?

 

Peace

[[Al...]]

Yesterday was awful but last nite the valium finally kicked in and I was able to skip a dose of am Xanax plus I was able to return to sleep each time I woke up.  I even dreamed of Dunkin Donuts.  I haven't eaten junk food in 4 months especially pastries etc.  If you note my signature I was already taking 2 benzos for years so hopefully I can taper them both.

[Guest [Na...]]

Hi Alycat,

 

yes, the crazy dreams! I have so many since my taper. Stuffing myself with pie came a few times. Not even that crazy about pie.

 

This is a good thing! Means you are healing. Keep it up! Possibly you can eventually just taper from Valium only.

 

Naf1983

 

Yesterday was awful but last nite the valium finally kicked in and I was able to skip a dose of am Xanax plus I was able to return to sleep each time I woke up.  I even dreamed of Dunkin Donuts.  I haven't eaten junk food in 4 months especially pastries etc.  If you note my signature I was already taking 2 benzos for years so hopefully I can taper them both.

[[Al...]]

I haven’t had a rich dessert in months or any junk food or ……. Cokes and I used to be a junk food junkie!!    Wonder if I’ll have a food relapse when I heal from benzos.