I'm starting to lose it.

[[Mu...]]

Today I reached a new low, felt more desperate and trapped then I've ever felt and it feels like symptoms are getting worse and worse. I've heard of food sensitivity/chemical sensitivity but I seem to be sensitive to literally everything. Even a glass of water can set off my symptoms. I barely see anyone with my symptoms and there's so many that hits me at once. Everyone seems to have standard symptoms like DP/DR, OCD, Depression, Dizziness and anxiety... I've always had extreme symptoms throughout this which makes me feel more alone. I made a list of everything I've experienced. I'm starting to think this isn't benzo related but all tests come back negative.

Today I had the worst wave, all my symptoms revved up after eating. Always starts with head pressure, then it turned into jaw tightness, then pressure in my face. Then my throat felt like it was tightening, my left arm felt tight and droopy, my left leg felt tight. Then I started feeling like my head was splitting from reality (Not D/R I remember that feeling earlier on). See I don't see anyone with these symptoms and I've never heard of waves progressing like that.

I did the only thing I could do which was to sleep this off. But even in my dreams which was super weird, I was dreaming of being afraid of food and staying quit when my mom who is dead would ask me what's wrong because I knew no one understand and the food made me scared because I knew it could set me off. In that dream I went to sleep. I feel so stuck and helpless like things are only getting worse

[[...]]

That symptom is absolutely horrible. I also have my symptoms ramp up when I eat. It doesn’t matter what I eat. I’m sensitive to all foods. My solution was to eat about 10 to 15 small portions a day. That seemed to help me a little.

[[So...]]

I kinda did the same as x-ray:

I ate small things ALL day and ALL night (since I was awake)

I always felt like eating made my symptoms worse (if that was even possible) but I just ate anyway cuz I knew I needed to.

Im 3 years off now and healed. But I keep catching videos of myself on "3 years ago today" on my phone...  And there are videos  of me talking and lifting my arms a little and even taking some steps (in the beginning) and THEN videos 30 MINS LATER after I eat and it is worse. Can't lift my arms or legs.

So I mean, I know sometimes we think we must be crazy, that's why my hubby filmed me. He knew it was real. And I literally just watched it yesterday.

It was real. Eating food did make my symptoms worse!

Not sure why? Maybe it has something to do with all the blood rushing to your stomach to help digest, or your CNS trying to "rest and digest" which is what happens when you eat. Your brain says relax, no need to be ready to run or get away. So it diverts energy away from your head and limbs and sends it to your stomach.....therefore weaker limbs??? And because we are so sensitive our bodies detect it as limp noodle limbs??!!!!!

 

I don't know. It was just something I tried to make sense of.....but really sometimes this shit just doesn't make sense

But at least you know you are not crazy! It really happens!

And mine 100% went away

[[Th...]]

Mine was so bad I was force fed for months. I begged for them to stop feeding me. And yes I thought I was crazy when I mentioned water could do that. Felt like I couldn't breath, body weakness and fatigue, feeling the food burn my insides as it went through.

[[Ha...]]

Mine was so bad I was force fed for months. I begged for them to stop feeding me. And yes I thought I was crazy when I mentioned water could do that. Felt like I couldn't breath, body weakness and fatigue, feeling the food burn my insides as it went through.

. How are you doing now? Are things better for you?

[[Th...]]

Yes I can usually eat without pain and when I do feel pain it is not unbearable. Now my stomach burns a little and I get sight fatigue. It's unpleasant and would probably get easier if my appetite returns as I don't feel hungry ever. I still avoid gluten. When I was finally able to feed myself I still have to force myself to eat through the pain. I had to take breaks or would try to eat so fast before my body knew what was happening. The pain would last hours.