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Anone els find a good day or sleep is follwed by HELL the next day?


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I cycle mostly from  day to day mornings are are ALWAYS hell but then sometimes a bit later in the day symptoms drop off to what even though I still have the symptoms I am able to do a bit more moving about, the the following day God help me!! Anything ''GOOD'' like good mobility, decant night sleeping or eating and enjoying it without feeling like my foods killing me and making me feel worse,  the next day is hell times 100??  Anyone else find they cycle like this? I know waves and windows are ''normal'' but right now the state of mind I'm in I need validation that is not just me  :(

 

                                                        Nova  :smitten: :smitten:

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Unfortunately, I am largely the opposite. I suffer from night terrors and wake up nearly every hour on the hour. Then I spend the morning in prayer/meditation and reading Psalms in the Bible. I then try to go about my day organized by a “To Do” list to keep myself distracted/ focused/busy. Unfortunately, I find that I still crash about mid-day and sleep for about 1.5 hours. Then I feel very fuzzy and disoriented in the afternoon. I think our different patterns just show that everyone’s experience in withdrawal is different. There just seems to be no rhyme or reason. I really hope your days get better and my nights get better! You are validated for sure! It is not just you. It is just that our symptoms vary and the rhythms of our waves and windows are different. Hang in there. You got this!
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Yes I'm similar, if I have a half decent sleep or day, I know the next night and day is going to be bad. It's as though my body is only allowing me a certain amount of sleep and respite. No idea why
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You’re not the only one, Nova.  I have days where I actually feel human and when I’m going to bed that night I feel hopeful that I’ve turned a corner and then Bam! The next day is pretty horrendous. 

The result is that I get anxiety now when I have a somewhat decent day because I anticipate the crash!

 

My mornings, too , are very bad with somewhat of an improvement over the day.  My nights are not too good. I wake up repeatedly because of pain and anxiety.

 

We’ll get through this eventually…….it’s so hard though.

 

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You are describing exactly what I experience. It isn’t just you. I started my taper off clonazepam Jan 20 and kept a record of my moods. I stopped keeping the record a few weeks ago. I noticed after every “good” day I would get a horrendous day. It was just too hard to know what was coming next. Yesterday I had an okay afternoon and evening, and like you, I felt hopeful and that maybe I was turning a corner. But then last night I slept about 2 hours and today feel dreadful- depressed, scared, hopeless, and have head pain. I think my poor brain is trying to get better- maybe producing the normal feel good chemicals (okay day) and then they get depleted (bad day) I had this pattern before my taper too- I think I was in tolerance withdrawal? I describe this to my doctors and they say, “That’s just how your depression is.” I don’t buy that. My husband says that “thr  benzos and withdrawal are disregulating your brain.” I am sorry you are suffering with this, but glad to know it is not just me. Hopefully, over time this will all smooth out- wouldn’t it be wonderful to have 2 good days in a row, then 3, then… I am praying we all get through this and reach a point of recovery. And yes, mornings in general are worse.
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What pain do you have 2cats?

 

Hip, lower back and leg pain mostly although some days I hurt all over.  Also gut issues flare up and my gut throbs too. The hip and leg pain are the way worst.  Making me insane! Really!

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Curcumin for  a while for inflammation but wasn’t working too great. Now I take ibuprofen and X strength Tylenol .  They only take the edge off but many times I am in pretty bad pain! I understand that we are extra sensitive to pain as we taper and recover.  It is excruciating at times and of course when it’s that bad I have huge, terrible anxiety episodes. 

 

Yay! What a life!  :-\

 

I also practice deep breathing and it actually helps calm me a bit. Lying on the floor “grounds” me at times also.  I’ll take what I can get.

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nova -- I can relate -- and perserverence -- that line from the docs of "that's just what depression does" -- is total crap.  if you were having three good days followed by one bad day or one bad day followed by six good days -- they would say the same thing.  the reality is we ARE depressed in this --- not just from seratonin depletion and Gaba dysregulation but situationally as well - -who wouldn't be!  but this is not organic depression that needs some sort of other "fix" -- so glad you can see through that.  it doesn't make the downhill slide and crash any easier though.

 

nova, I have started to think about it like my home remodeling team has got it right, working in concert and kicking ass creating a feel good day or moment ----- we get to enjoy the view and glimpse (of the real us) for a moment, hour, day and then back to work they go!

 

you are certainly not alone

 

 

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Hi All,

I am right there with all of you!  This journey is HELL there is no other way to explain it.  I am so very sorry we have to suffer like this we have to hang on the best we can.  I have horrible morning anxiety that lasts pretty much all day.  Yesterday afternoon and evening were better than I've had in quite sometime but today not so good.

Prayers for everyone ❤

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