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Odd issues with memory, connection and brain spaces


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Just needing reassurance this is something psychiatric drug withdrawal/healing related, and I don't have permanent brain damage.

 

I have been making some small bits of progress, in that, I'm not freaking out every second. I seem to be stuck more im a constant freeze/dissociated state on some level,  I think from being worn down over the months post-rapid-taper.

 

The sensations/feelings I'm getting are very mental and scare me. I think a lot of it is DPDR but I welcome any information. It feels like everything in my head happens in a fragmented, back part of my brain I can't access, so it feels like someone else's thoughts/memories or that it's something "not a part of me" I can't access, which makes it seem a lot more sinister, scary, and I can't really get to the thought the resolve it. It makes intrusive thoughts feel more real because they sort of occur as a separate thought in my mind, like an event, as opposed to "me" thinking it and being able to address it as an intrusive thought.

 

I've also been having issues with memories and feelings from the past. By that, I don't mean intrusive memories. It's like my brain has trouble processing the idea of old feelings or jogged memories when I'm in a familiar place. It seems like it can't feel or focus on anything besides the present, and the concept of recalling old feelings is confusing and too overwhelming for it. For example, I'm packing up my house and moving. I spent most of my withdrawal at my folk's house. When I go to my old house, I remember living there, feelings, memories, etc. and it sort of confuses me, like my brain can't process they're all part of the same mind and experience, and things don't "smoothly flow" in my head, which leads to a lot of anxiety. Not sure if this is part of the DPDR if it's something affecting the memory in my brain, etc.

 

Does anyone else get these kinds of occurrences? Does this get better with time?

 

I'm deeply afraid of having psychosis or losing my mind, and any reassurance would be appreciated.

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I actually think i experience i lot of the same.

 

I Feel disconnected from my self and my memories, and everything happens in the back of my head, like my frontal lobe is gone or something. I cant really look forward or backwards, i am stuck in the present time.

 

I struggle to think in general and have really bad memory

 

 

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I can relate to that too.  I have dpdr and sometimes I have a memory in my head and I think its a thought and it just stsyes there. Feel like I csnt here my own voice inside my head. Im sorry this dpdr is scary
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  • 1 month later...

I have time and memory issues too. For example, I remember clearly things which happened but I dont feel like they happened.

IE I was on vacation for last 3 weeks and returned home 2 days ago. I know I have been on vacation and remember it but I dont have feeling that I have been there. Like I have no connection to my past self. Like I dont remember how I used to be yesterday or prior days. How I used to feel in those past days. In result I dont feel like I have been somewhere or did something. Scary... I hope it will pass as I cant live like this

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