First day benzo free and husband has a Heart Attack!

[[Gi...]]

Well, if there was ever a test-run for being without xanax for the first time in more than 23 years,  THIS takes the cake!

 

First things first.  Praise God he's going to be okay!  He's having surgery today.  But day before yesterday on Day 1 of being xanax free we found ourselves racing to the ER.  Married almost 50 years so this was very terrifying!!  On top of xanax withdrawal I've got other serious health issues, and won't bore anyone with that except to say it makes everything even more challenging.

 

Nevertheless, I did astonishingly well!  I didn't have any panic at all and actually felt more calm and "in control" than I have in ages!! Huh?  The first night he was in the hospital I did not sleep ONE WINK.  I had some anxiety adrenaline rushes laying there all night staring at the ceiling, but they didn't scare me.    And in spite of ZERO sleep,  I drove to the hospital again yesterday and stayed all day.  When I say I drove to the hospital, that is HUGE - because I haven't driven for years, not because of anxiety, but because of my other health issues.  And, I not only drove to the hospital, but I also drove at night, which I don't do because I have horrible night vision.  Even so,  I still did not have a panic attack or dizziness.  But, I'm fully ready and even expecting that I will have them.   

 

Last night I was so exhausted I slept like a baby.  Today is day 3 of no xanax and  I'm at the hospital waiting.  What a test!.  But now I know I'll make it!    We can do all this buddies!  Hang in there!

[[dr...]]

Congratulations! 23 years is incredible. I am hoping for the best for your husband. You sound like you are coping well and sometimes the stressors can get you moving and help with sleep afterwards. This reminds me of my jump season when I had parentals get sick and begin to move on. Please post on your progress.

[[Ka...]]

Oh my Gitfiddle - what a test of your courage and strength and right out of the gate!!  I do hope everything goes alright with your hubby's surgery, please keep us posted.  Driving had become a huge struggle for me too.  But I had to take my hubby to the ER for the first time ever in our 41 years of marriage about 2 months after my taper finished and I pulled that off without a hitch also.  It is so nice to feel competent and capable and this only gets better with time!! 

[[Gi...]]

Thank you drad dog. I think you’re right! And congratulations on you ur success too!

Kate, It’s so good to hear you made it through that scare too!  It’s nice to know it will continue to get even better.  It’s feels amazing to not be paralyzed by fear.  Congratulations to you too!

[[Gi...]]

Update-  hubby’s surgery was a success and he came home today and is doing great!  His arteries were 99% and 80% blocked!  They put in stints and he feels better than ever! A modern miracle! 

. Last night was night 3 without Xanax:  I had some insomnia and was awake in the night for a couple hours but  managed to go back to sleep. Not too bad considering I was alone and was worrying about him.

 

This had been such a test and has really stretched me. But I’m feeling confident that I’ve turned the corner and have truly kissed benzos goodbye.    When I read how horrific the WD experiences for others here at BB are, I can only say that we are all different.  Maybe for me, it had something to do with taking it really slow, Plus, I took a couple of very long breaks when things in my life were stressful.  It’s not that it’s been easy.  It hasn’t, but it’s been tolerable.  But I know we can all get through this no matter what path we’ve taken.

[[Ka...]]

Thank you for updating us and it is so good to hear your hubby is doing well.  It sounds like both you and your hubby have been given a new lease on life!   

[[...]]

Heyyyyyyy you did it!!! I am so proud of, and inspired by you. Im close, real close to the jump. and OMG what a trial to have your husband suffer a HA - be in a hospital (always a stress fest). But you did it smart, and prevailed and I think you two are going to have a really wonderful summer. Im just so happy for you. Congratulations, take each day as a victory! BMC

[[Gi...]]

Thank you BMC! And you’re almost there too!  Can’t wait to celebrate with you! 🎉🎊