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Why did you decide to go off benzos?


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Facing another wave here. Tomorrow is my 18 months anniversary and I am trying hard to remember why I decided to go off benzos. The longer we go into withdrawal, the more we forget about the reasons for being off. Any reassurance is welcome.
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I felt like I didn't have a choice but to stop them. I was getting really sick with nosebleeds and intense interdose withdrawal anxiety/depression, and outside of that in terms of my personality I was a zombie version of myself. After 2.5 years of that garbage I was so tired of being so codependent on constantly having a bottle of pills on me. I'd still take being in WD over that nightmare any day.
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I also didn’t have other choice since I had paradoxical reactions to all medications from early on and was getting sicker and more physically dependent on them. Although I am sick now, I rather be sick without the drug than be on it still, at least I am not poisoning myself anymore. Even without paradoxical reactions, I now know that those pills aren’t meant to take long term and will end up causing health effects eventually so better of than on. And they made me so numb I wasn’t enjoying life anyways when I was on them. But that’s just my experience.

 

Sorry you are going through a rough time. Just take it one day at a time.

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Cause I made comparison how I was before whole benzo story and what I became after.

I'm in 5th month being off after 16 years of addiction of benzodiazepines and opiates.

The life was never better.

I'm afraid even of all these happiness and stability that I experience now.

 

Not all of us heals in the same time and way, but all of us we will in the end.

Some sooner some later.

Patience. ❤️

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Thank you everyone. It is hard at this stage. A few days I feel normal, nearly 100% healed, and in the next day I feel like crap again. I have to learn to pace and be more patient.  :smitten:
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Absolutely patience!

If you have days where you feel almost healed the healing goes very well!

I started to feel great immediately after the jumping.

Then in the month 4th I felt very down for 3 weeks.

Now again I'm feeling that I'm 100 % healed but I expect to fall again, but again good days will come.

 

Nothing is worst of the period when I was in benzo tolerance with years.

 

Be patient ❤️

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After 40+ years of off and on again of 5mgs. usage, and after my husband died, the drug wasn't working anymore, and it gave me insomnia, nightmares and depression, I then decided it was not working and stopped, basically cold turkey and had no idea that there was something called Benzo withdrawal until I found this site.
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Thank you everyone. It is hard at this stage. A few days I feel normal, nearly 100% healed, and in the next day I feel like crap again. I have to learn to pace and be more patient.  :smitten:

 

It’s amazing that you have those days where you feel nearly 100% at this point! I am 19 months from my setback and still haven’t had a proper window. On my manageable days I feel maybe 5-10% of what so was before. So you are doing great. Have patience and don’t push yourself too much on the better days. Give your body time to heal.

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Spazzie, hello, and take my condolence for your husband.

Yes, it exist withdrawal for many of the benzo users, especially those ones on a longer stages.

 

You didn't passed withdrawal at all after stopping cold turkey?

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