Lost in withdrawls

[[Ri...]]

Hi, I'm really glad this is here I am not doing well at all right now, coming off of 2mg of Klonopin twice (or some days more) a day for the past year with some Valium in the mix, and a smaller dose for a year and a half before that, and before that it was Xanax 1mg whenever I wanted, before that it was .5mg Xanax for a couple years as needed and not as abused.. My doctor is a crazy POS and just decided to stop giving me my meds, I have not had any since sunday late night/ Monday early early morning.. I had to go to the ER Wednesday night where they gave me 15 1mg pills of Atavan (which I have never taken), then told me to follow up with my primary care doc, well he wont talk to me basically told me to stop calling and go stand in line at the free clinic or hospital like the rest of the people without insurance after he told me he'd help me and has been helping me out since I was laid off February 2011 (had insurance before then). he has been giving me the meds for the past 21/2 yrs when i moved out here from home where I was getting it from another doctor.. anyways my withdrawls are really bad hence the ER, I have now gone to a few free clinics, the free hospital, etc and NOBODY wants to touch the benzo topic, give me more so I can taper off, or even really give me advice as to what I should do since being cut off abruptly by my doctor.. I and losing hope and am so scared that when this Atavan runs out in a couple days I'm going to lose it, I have one more hope at a clinic and trying to find a doctor I can pay out of pocket to help me and just bill me.. I am SOO sick with wd symptoms, the Atavan helps somewhat, help!!

I am also on 10mg lexapro

Riz

[Guest [Si...]]

Rizzy,

 

Welcoming you to BenzoBuddies.

You will find plenty of support here.

 

Sigma.

[[Ri...]]

Thank you Sigma, besides my sponsor who went though this 3 years ago when she first got sober, I don't have many outlets, and it seems all the medical professionals think I just want more benzos when really I just want off of them, but safely and comfortably would be nice..

[Guest [Si...]]

Thank you Sigma, besides my sponsor who went though this 3 years ago when she first got sober, I don't have many outlets, and it seems all the medical professionals think I just want more benzos when really I just want off of them, but safely and comfortably would be nice..

 

I don't have many outlets, and it seems all the medical professionals think I just want more benzos when really I just want off of them, but safely and comfortably would be nice..

 

That seems to be the case with many of us. Doctors think we want the Benzo for our "Drug of Choice".. when really we do not.

We can support you with your taper.

 

Sigma.

[[Mi...]]

Ouch!  Your doctor sounds like my former doctor.  They just don't understand benzo withdrawal.

 

I had to visit quite a few doctors before I found one who was willing to listen to me and did not treat me like a drug addict.  I gave him a copy of the Ashton manual and he actually read it and switched me to Valium for my taper. He was a knight in shining armor for me and without him and the support I received here at BB, it would have been a most difficult journey off of benzos.

 

Do you plan on continuing your search for a supportive doctor?  I know how frustrating and discouraging it is - I really do. I hope you will continue looking, and we'll be here to support you as well.

[[ca...]]

Hello Rizzy and welcoming you to BB! Sorry to hear about your Dr, my Dr also did not understand benzo w/d. It was very frustrating so I understand how you feel. We understand here and can help, please let us know what questions you may have.

[[Ri...]]

Thank you Missy and Cantwaitobebetter, I am going to continue for sure! I have decided I am going to seek private help however, the problem is not having insurance, but at this point I will pay out of pocket to get the help I rightfully need.. I have been researching, talked to a doctor at a recovery/ detox center in the city who's program is too expensive for me, but she gave me the name of a clinic and doctor to try out, so I will try that and if its a dud like the rest I'm going to have to find a regular MD, or hopefully and MD that specializes in addictionology.. any thoughts or suggestions on how to find the right doctor who is going to understand what I am going through? if I'm going to spend the money I want to find my "Knight is Shinning Armor" as well! Also Missy what is the Ashton Manual?? Thanks for your support!

[[bo...]]

R-Just google Heather Ashton and it will come up. She is an English doctor who specialized in benzo withdrawl tapering. Try to find a doctor you can work with as you don't want to cold turkey this medication as you've been on long enough to have a physical addiction...............BOX

[[Mi...]]

Professor Heather Ashton is an expert on benzo withdrawal.  She ran a clinic that helped people safely taper from benzos by crossing them over to Valium.  The Ashton Manual is a wealth of information about what benzos do to the body, withdrawal symptoms one can expect, how to safely withdraw, etc.

 

Here is a link to the Ashton manual. http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/index.htm

 

When I was searching for a new doc, I printed this out and took it with me to each appointment.  My former doc threw it in the trash in front of me, other doctors said "keep it - not interested", and my final doctor took it, read it, and is now helping other patients safely withdraw from benzos.

 

I think you will find this useful in understanding what you are experiencing.