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Depression not sure


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Does anyone feel like there stuck in their head. It hurts go think or even laugh or feel positive. It makes me want go cry but I can't cry. I have to hold it together. Im super sensitive to anything I read. Feel so bad about myself for this whole things. Thanks for any help.
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  • 1 month later...

Am I right to read into your post that you can't cry because you have to hold it together? Or, is it that you literally can't cry and the comment about holding it together is separate?

 

If you're fighting back the tears because you feel like you need to hold yourself together, I would suggest that it's probably better if you can have a cry. Better to cry "appropriately" (whatever that means) than for everything to spill out at exactly the wrong moment, as tends to happen when we're in the business of trying to bottle our emotions.

 

If it's the case that you literally can't cry, I'm sorry you're going through that because I've been there myself. This won't be forever, I can promise you that.

 

In either case, I hope that you can find the strength to keep going, because it definitely gets better. The despair that you are experiencing has a chemical origin. We understand this well enough to reliably predict that it will go away completely or recede to a more tolerable level in the next few years. It's impossible to be more precise than this but you need to understand the trick that your brain is playing with you. This trick makes everything worse because it really really really feels like this is how your life is going to be, until the day you die. It's such an effective trick that you need to remind yourself every single day that it is not true. If you're not often reminding yourself of the temporary nature of your situation, that's something you can work on. If you're not reminding yourself because you don't believe it is temporary, then that definitely needs work.

 

It's tough to reply about depression. I can remember being so flat that I wasn't looking after myself on a very basic level... but I can't really remember what that felt like exactly and I don't know what advice I could give to help. I do know that dragging myself into the shower would make me feel better, but I don't know what happened differently on the days I managed it versus the days when I didn't. It seems fairly random, to be honest. Some days I managed to pounce on the tiniest surge of motivation whereas others, I just didn't.

 

I'm not sure how helpful I have been. Peer support for depression is flawed due to the nature of the beast. I just wanted to try and help in some small way.

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