Hello! New member!

[[pa...]]

Hello my name's amanda. I've been on ativan (4mg) for 7 months. Started water tritation today. Still very confused and anxious that I got it wrong. I'm trying to wean off because they do not help and after research have found out the real truth of these poisions. I also have very muted emotions which I'm blaming on the ativan, not a good thing when you have a 7 month old daughter who you know you love to death but cant feel it.

Anyway just wanted to say hello and introduce myself!

Amanda

[[tr...]]

 

Hi Amanda, Welcome to the forum.

 

Yes, you would want to get off the benzos with a 7 month old baby.  You want to remember all the wonderful days as they will pass very quickly.

 

Someone will be along to help you with a taper. 

 

Ts

[[si...]]

hi welcome to the forum - i am sorry i missed you on the shout out board.

 

i answered your other post with a request for dose per tablet information - that will be helpful for someone to check your schedule.

[[el...]]

Hi Amanda,

Welcome to BB and very glad to have you here!

I personally don't know much about liquid titration, but I'm sure you are doing it right. There are others here who do understand it, and if you are uncertain, they can check it out and help you with it. Would you like me to contact someone to help you with it?

I'm a little curious as to why you chose liquid titration. With the amount you are currently on you could have easily started a taper using the dry cutting method directly from your pills without making them liquid. It would be much simpler and less confusing. What is the size of your pill ie how many mgs? You could probably taper at least halfway doing dry cut taper.

Take care, talk to you soon!

Linda

[[pa...]]

Thanks everyone!

I was told by another forum that water titration was the second best way to go (first with valium) because you can take small daily doses away. After dropping a whole pill in a month and going through terrible w/d symptoms I'm a bit afraid of dry cutting. I could try 1/4 off at a time but my doctor didnt give me that option last time, just told me to cut by 1/2 and it would be ok. I'm a little confused about what to do. 

My doses are 1mg x4 a day.

I tried the water tritation today and it was pretty confusing and made me very anxious.

Thanks for the welcome!

Amanda

 

[[el...]]

My doses are 1mg x4 a day.

I tried the water tritation today and it was pretty confusing and made me very anxious.

Thanks for the welcome!

Amanda

 

 

You could cut by a 1/4 of a 1mg pill a day.  Much smaller than the generally recommended 10%. My brain isn't working today, but I think that is aprox a 6% cut. Do you know what percent your titration is? Smaller cuts than that are in most cases(not all, some do better with minute cuts)  unnecessary and even unreasonable.  That would be pretty doable and much less confusion. And it probably wouldn't take as long. You could try it, and if it doesn't work for you, you can always go back to titration. It's up to you!

[[Co...]]

Hi Amanda,

 

What dose tablets do you use?

 

Titration can be very useful for tapering off the more potent benzos, especially. We tend to treat titration more as a very useful option if it should required. Some even use it when withdrawing from Valium. I don't make a distinction as to which method is best. For some, simple pill-splitting is best, as it is so simple. Others benefit from switching to Valium because of its sedating effects, and because of its long half-life and low potency tablets. Titration can be Godsend for those who cannot achieve small enough cuts no matter which benzo they use. If pill-splitting works for you, now, but you need it later when your dose has reduced to a level where pill-splitting is no longer practical, you may find it far easier to understand titration by that stage (you will be less benzo-fogged). What I'm saying is, if you find it confusing, but do not need it at this stage, you might benefit from using it lare instead (if you need it all, that is).

 

Whichever method(s) you use, is up to you. We will try to help you decide what's best for you.

[[pa...]]

Sorry for replying so late! I kinda forgot about this post  .

I use 1mg dose tabs, 4 times a day. I cannot get valium, my doctor doesnt support the ashton method and I already tried another doctor who thinks it's the rule of thumb to cut 1/2mg every 2 weeks so I've given up on it.

Today's day 3 of cut and I;m already shaky, dizzy, spaced out etc. LAst time I made it until day 5 when this happened. Is this normal? How long does it last usually?

[[Co...]]

Hi Paxton,

 

What dose tablets do you use? If they ate the 1mg tablets, I recommend that you cut by just a quarter of tablet at a time. This is just a sixteenth, or 6.25% of you dose. You cuts of 0.5mg from a total dose of 4mg is 12.5%, more than many can manage. Smaller cuts are better tolerated, and might mean that you can make cuts more frequently.

[[Be...]]

Hi, Amanda.  I'm a long time ativan user and new member but want to offer what support I can. The highest I got was 1 mg 3x/day and got down to 2mg before starting this latest taper.  I have been doing it all by pill splitting and it's been going okay.  Many bad days but some good ones.  Since I have 1 mg tablets, I have been splitting them in 1/4 ths and reducing by 1/4 tablet/day every few weeks - reasonably slowly IMHO.  I saw my new doc today and she gave me a script for .5mg tablets.  So eventually, I will be splitting them in 1/4ths, too, when I get down to my final few months.  I worked out a schedule that, if I can stick to it, will mean I will be benzo free by mid-July. 

 

I am ignorant about more than the basic idea of water titration and my brain is still in too much fog for me to figure it out.  Pill splitting has worked for me so far, though I surely would consider it when the cuts get really small.  I expect I will be able to think a little better by then so it should all work out.

 

Do I understand correctly that you are taking 1 mg 3x/day + .75mg 1/day?  How is your sleep? How have you been feeling?  I actually felt less dizzy and spacy when I reduced the drug but not right away.  Be patient with your body. It will begin to heal itself.

 

Kathie

[[pa...]]

Thank you beeper! Yes I'm taking 1mg x 3 and .75mg. My sleep is fine, actually it's a little too much sleep I'm getting. I think the depression has been kicking in to a higher gear because I'll wake up and force myself back to sleep so I dont have to get up and deal with this. Usually I dont wake up until 8:30am and depending on my daughter I'll go back to sleep until 9:30, that's after going to sleep at 9ish pm. I'm still dizzy, shaky, spaced out. Almost had a full blown panic attack last night but my breathing exercise helped stop it in it's tracks.

I'm hoping to make it through this but I'm not so sure I'm strong enough.

Amanda

[[Be...]]

(((Amanda)))

 

I know this is a very tough thing to do and I would think it would be even harder with the responsibility of caring for a 7 month old infant.  (Is she your first?)  Do you know for sure that you don't have a physical condition that could be causing those symptoms? Low blood pressure and low blood sugar come to mind. 

 

Whatever is related to the ativan withdrawal will pass. I hope you will hang in there until you feel better so you'll have more confidence in yourself to get through this.  Try to remember the reasons you have for getting off of it and that you will ultimately need to increase your intake of ativan just to feel "normal" if you don't. 

 

If you feel llike writing more about what your life or day is like, I'd be interested to read it and I'm sure others would, too.  Sometimes just sharing with others who've been where you've been can help.

 

I'll be thinking about you today and sending you healing thoughts. 

[[pa...]]

The reason I want to come off ativan is I NEVER feel normal lol. I have very muted emotions and still have anxiety. I dont feel like myself ever.

Let me go back and tell you guys when this started.

We tried to conceive my daughter, ended up being told I had pcos after fertility exams. Went on to treatments, had 2 miscarriages and finally got pregnant with my daughter. During that time I became very depressed and it stayed on while I was pregnant. At 13 weeks I had my first panic attack. I ended up going to the hospital twice thinking I was having a heartattack, they did every test in the book and said it was anxiety. We tried zoloft and it made me suicidal, prozac that would only work for 2 weeks and stop, up the dose and same thing. So I was on my own. Got up to a total of 6 or more panic attacks a day, blood pressure sky rocketed, put on bed rest. It just got worse and worse. I eventually ended up with depersonalization/derealization and that was the worst part. I still have it to this day.  When I had her I felt fantastic for the first 14 days and then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I went into the hospital and they gave me lamictal and ativan, said I could take the ativan 4 times a day and up to 2 mg per dose. This doctor did NOT warn me about the addictiveness or anything. I started myself at .25mg twice a day, then 4 times a day. I went to a "drug lady" as I call them and she told me to go to 4mg a day. I did it stupidly, didnt know anything about it. We then tried welbuttrin, lexapro, prozac again. None of it helped. So I started seeing my current doctor and was put on effexor xr and abilify for my obsessive thoughts. I feel like a drug addict now, lamictal, ativan, effexor and abilify. Way too much but I was willing to do anything to feel normall, I regret it terribly now. And that's how i ended up this way.

Now I wake up and feel horrible, cant drive, cant leave the house without my husband, I just want to feel normal again btu I dont think I will and cant even remember what normal is.

Sorry for all of this bujt I wanted you to know how I ended up this way.

Amanda

[[el...]]

Amanda, I"m so sorry you had to go thru this. Just because you wanted a baby so much. It's not fair. I have heard that in some cases, the high hormones of fertility tx's can actually trigger anxiety and panic. And then you pile on the pregnancy hormones. Then you have the baby, and all those hormones just plummet. It just has to do a massive number on you.

And then top it all off with a psych drug cocktail!!

 

By the way, you are much stronger than you know. We all have reserves that we are consciously unaware of, but it's there when we need it. Look what you've been thru already, for the love of a child.

You will recover. Just keep doing what you are doing, take it one day at a time. Get off the meds, but do it sensibly.

"What do you do when walking through Hell?................Keep walking!"

[[pa...]]

Thanks eljay! My doctor told me that the hormones of the treatments and then pregnancy may have triggered it. I should have just waited a little longer after I had her before going to the doctor because maybe it would have evened out on it's own. Too late to know now.

I know some where I have the power to do this but sometimes I dont feel it. I know I'll somehow get through this, have no other choice. Will not stay on these drugs forever just because it's hard to come off. One day they will make me anyway.