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Is it possible to still have racing thoughts? What about lack of sexual desire?


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Hey fellow BBs,

 

My mind races at least 3-4 times per day along with intrusive memories. I’m scared.  I am coping but it’s really challenging...it’s so painful.  I just sit and sob sometimes, I hate the poor me stuff but I am really having a hard time still...warm showers, walks on the beach...I should be in heaven right?  Yet it’s agony.

 

I know I’m early in recovery...I wish someone could find a cure for this pain.  I’m so sad...the worst of this is now I do not even enjoy intercourse.  Yep.  No feeling in my vaginal region, none.  Now I’m paranoid again, looping thoughts that my sexual orientation might be changing because of benzo withdrawal?  No offense but vaginas are borderline repulsive to me and I like penis but no longer desire it?  This makes no freaking sense.  Anyone go through this at all?

 

 

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Fiercelady it is quite possible to have intrusive thoughts. Most of us have them. I sympathise with you.They are the worst but it gets easier. How are you coping?
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I try my best to stay as active as I can it seems to really help.  The weekends I typically spend time with my significant other and we try to do things together Ie: going out to dinner.  He understands my condition and is supportive.  But the intrusive thoughts and racing mind are horrible...the irritability is difficult as well.  I get agitated over the smallest things that are ridiculous.

 

I pray a lot, nap when I can, watch movies and reality TV, spend time with my best friend (he’s 89 and absolutely awesome).  I talk with a therapist, journal.  I try my best to be in the moment but there are certainly times I quit and complain.  I worry this condition is not temporary...periodically I have amazing windows and I want to jump for joy...I am waiting to completely heal, I pray my time comes soon.

 

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About the sex desire, its very common in withdrawal.

You will get the feelings back with some time.

My feelings returned after 16 month but the sex desire or attraction towards opposite sex has waned completely in withdrawal. Now its getting back slowly I can say about 30-40 %. Its still very low but I hope may it return one day completely. With out it I feel emotion less.

 

The feeling will improve try to avoid having sex for some time may be give it some break and let it heal.

 

The last breakthrough came during previous month I avoided sex as it was our Holy month Ramazan.

After one month of fasting and avoiding sexual desires my feelings returned from 30% to 90%.

 

This has been one of my biggest concerns. The first week of withdrawal I was going to end my life when I discovered that I had zero sexual feelings and desires. I felt I'm not a human anymore. But God gave me strength to fight. Have faith in God you will heal.

 

The brain has an amazing ability to heal but it takes time.

 

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Raiz.Withdrawal is challenging but with faith, knowledge,patience, acceptance victory is inevitable. It is more of learning from living from the spirit man not the flesh.
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Fiercelady.We all heal but the intrusive thoughts and racing what if thoughts are one of the mental symptoms together with depression. They are at times distressing. But you find courage from inside to leave and not trust the feelings.
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