I had to hire an attorney because of"non believing" family members harrassing me

[[Mi...]]

This isn't easy to talk about because only people with a dysfunctional family will maybe understand. After a year of being off of Ativan and a severe Reglan reaction my husband & I did some evaluating of my journey through this to help plan for our future & to further facilitate my recovery. I am doing much much better than I was months ago when I was in the acute phase. (So hang in there. It does get better. It takes a long time.) One of my biggest struggles which certainly did not help my recovery process, was getting my two closest family members (my father and my sister) to listen, believe and respect my need to have space and time to recover. It has been a battle since day one. Even back in acute withdrawl I could tell my father one day how sick I was in great detail, and the very next day he would call me to do some piss ant thing for him just purely for his entertainment. I have been assertive and firm and finally had to be brash in telling him how sick I am and how long it will take. I gave him printouts etc. My father is a well-off, healthy person who retired young at 50 years old. I know it is difficult for anyone besides ourselves to fully understand the pain, and physically limiting symptoms of withdrawal, but people get sick in life in one way or another. It's a simple fact of life. We are all vulnerable human beings. I have certainly been there for my father over the years for his medical needs such as colonoscopy check ups and some of his other well visits, testing, and also to entertain him with visits and dinners. This is where the purpose of my post comes in: I just cannot believe that in my time of need the same empathy that I have given him over the years is not reciprocated. In fact my illness during all of this has not been taken seriously at all by them. The requests that comes from family to participate in things that I just physically cannot do at this time is ridiculous and shows a total lack of caring on their part. I have attempted to reach out to my sister on several occasions to help me deal with our father so as I have time to heal and she too does not listen, care or believe. So I hired an attorney to help me with this. We are starting with a letter that explains my illness in detail from a medication injury, along with many informative medical printouts; and that I need them to cooperate in order to help me heal. I cannot be expected to do any family activities until I am healed. It is not a mean letter. Just factual. My sister and my father will both be receiving this letter. I know that I cannot control whether someone cares or not. I cannot make someone be nice to me. The letter is to safeguard me from getting phone calls asking me to run errands or entertain family. If they still call and have requests of me that I just cannot fulfill; I can easily refer to the letter they received from my lawyer and put a quick end to a mess of me having to explain, yet again my situation. Of course if they continue to disregard my struggle, the next step would be a cease and desist letter. I am just venting as to how the very people who I thought really cared don't take it seriously. It just blows my mind. If the roles were reversed, I would not treat someone in my situation the way I am being treated during my recovery. I'm talking even before I knew anything about benzos or withdrawal or even before I even took a benzo in my life. If a family member came to me with their pain, even though it is 90% subjective symptoms, I would still believe them. I would believe them because I would have the intellect and the empathy to realize that it is just not in someone's character to make things up, limit themselves purposefully, and complain of suffering for months on end. I would believe the person. The decision to hire an attorney actually was not a hard one at all because it had come to that point and was almost overdue. I feel like I am being harrassed actually. I am here to vent how in shock I am that family members can be so unempatheric and downright mean. Thank God my husband is 100% supportive. This letter was actually his idea because he wants me to have every ounce of energy in my physical & emotional being to get through this. And, we WILL all get through it in time when our receptors upregulate and our nervous systems heal.

 

"When I come to you with my pain. I am not asking you if you think it is valid."