Feeling crazy and punishing myself

[[be...]]

I am posting again...I am having problems coping and can't find the will to try to use a coping skill.  So, internally, I'm berating myself.  Which I know isn't helpful.  I'm on a roller coaster from hell right now.

[[Ca...]]

I am sorry that you are going through this. It is so difficult to just not be able to cope and then have that additional shame of feeling like a failure or a pointless human being because you cannot cope. You are not a failure and you are not pointless and you do not need to be punished. You are not bad. You are withdrawing from a medicine that may have taken quite a bit of your life, that may have changed you, stunted development in some ways, kept you alive in others-- a medicine that induces both calm and increased suicidality. You are doing better and you are trying to be better and that is what matters.

 

And I would say coming on here is a coping mechanism that you have found for yourself. Keep coming on here if necessary, to this community of those that understand what you are going through. You are coping because you are surviving. Keep coping please!

[[tw...]]

Can you curl up and watch TV? If you have HBO, On Demand has some very light, entertaining movies this weekend. Or just watch a sit-com. If you have an armchair, curl up and stuff some pillows around you - it's kind of like a Temple Grandin hug machine. Hang in there! Tonight will end.

[[be...]]

Thank you, I Want to change my internal voice.  So harsh.