LOVE DURING WD

[[Es...]]

I don’t believe one can find love online anymore. I dated two boyfriends whom I met online. Was very fond of one of them. We stuck together for a few yrs. It was long ago, at the uni. But times are different.

 

I also think we terribly need those endorphins, cause our whole brain chemistry is screwed up by psych meds. I guess if one isn’t able to love oneself, it doesn’t make sense to actively look for a partner.

 

All we’re capable of in the early stages of WD is infatuation, not love. My dream is to pursue my passion in life. This will give my life a meaning. It is more important than to fall in love again. I don’t need other ppl to make me happy. I need to find happiness within.

 

Hello Estee,

 

Thanks for posting.

I really liked your post. I think you are right... if we cant love ourselves, we cant love someone new!!! However, we still love our family and friends.

I would love to find a partner because I would like to share my life with someone but I also need to find my true purpose too. Life its hard... we have been thru a lot and well I think that its not going to be easy to find someone who understand us completely... Im afraid because I dont want to lose more loved ones in my life... in the meantime I give my love to my family and my lovely dog. Times will show me who is worth to be with.

 

Love,

 

Latina

 

Latina, I understand you perfectly. Being with the other person, the one we’re really attached to, is fun and happiness. But we cannot base our happiness on that person’s presence in our life. Our recovery and well-being should be our number 1 priority. I used to have my world nearly revolve around one person twice in my life.

 

I felt really miserable when I had to end those relationships. Now I know I can be single and happiness is still within my reach. It depends on my recovery. On putting together all the broken pieces of myself. It takes time and experience. All those “happy couples”, who look so wonderful from the outside. Are often not that wonderful in reality. They often strive to project a certain image.

 

Love will come to you when you’re strong, independent and happy. Not only external beauty attracts ppl. There is sth inside which is much more important. I hope you’re on a good road to recovery and your second half will find you when the time is right. When you’re least expecting it. Concentrate on your recovery. On your goals and dreams.

[[ne...]]

What a beautiful post, Estee! 

[[gi...]]

HELLO BUDDIES,

 

I WOULD LIKE TO ASK YOU ABOUT LOVE AND BENZO TAPERING?

 

IN THE LAST 2 YEARS I WENT THRU 2 ENGAGEMENTS (YES, I AM THE WOMAN OF THE RINGS) AND I WANT TO LOVE AGAIN. I DONT KNOW IF DURING TAPERING IS OK TO DATE AND FEEL LOVED?

I FEEL INSECURE ABOUT MYSELF BECAUSE I DONT KNOW HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE TO BE MYSELF AGAIN.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? ANY LOVE STORIES DURING TAPERING OR WD

 

 

Successful withdrawal is more important than finding new love, in my opinion.  While a new relationship may be nice and exciting, it isn't necessarily in the best interest of a person who's withdrawing to embark on such serious undertaking as finding new love.  Doing so demonstrates serious disregard for completing the withdrawal successfully.  It also casts serious doubt on the person who claims to be in withdrawal as to the legitimacy and severity of their symptoms.  In my opinion, if one truly suffers both physically and mentally, finding new love will be the last thing on their mind.  Also, finding new love to overcome one's insecurity about themselves will not work because it leads to emotional co-dependence, which is very unhealthy.  Overcoming insecurity needs to happen from within if we are to be truly happy.  If we predicate it upon someone else, it's a recipe for disaster.  But everyone is different, and everyone is free to do as they please.  Now that's my five cents.

[[Es...]]

I agree with Ginger. It’s just swapping the mood-altering substance high for the endorphins high. It’s impossible to love someone without loving oneself first. I think we should also differentiate between infatuation and love. In WD we need to take care of our own well-being above all else. This has nothing to do with egoism. This is survival instinct. Falling in love is risky, as our judgement is impaired. We may get hurt and compromise our WD. Just my point of view.

 

[[Be...]]

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