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When you have waves out of nowhere, what symptoms do you have?


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My wave symptoms would be intense episodes of dizziness, accompanied with intenese panic attacks, feeling heavy dp/dr and sweating hands, heart palps...
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vibrating. inner vibrating that gets very intense; i'm already paws but this overwhelms any other concern; it really brings me right to that edge of taking something anything to avoid a hospital or worse...i've almost run down for a big bottle of cold beer and i never drink, even when well i just don't...maybe a one glass of cumulative wine in decades and more...i think about rescue dosing and reinstating...i think about just radically accepting some how that i couldnt' even die in an oganized way and get stuff to people...before strangers pick thru it..

 

.i mean a lot of stuff comes out of the blue and smacks me hard quickly...head aches like blinding flashed, you wonder if you've had a stroke...you really think you must have...that this is so unusual and severe it HAS to be a major event...kind of instant mega migraine and more...but it receded or i wouldn't be here....

 

this inner vibrating thing just sets the whole organism perking and fluttering with incredible spped...the mind speeds up to...the last thing you need, it's already full on alarm 24/7...so even in hell this inner vibrating thing...especially at my core and center but radiating everywhere to fingertips...everywhere...every sensitive area you can think of..

 

...a lot of fluttering flopping vibrating inside...it's the kind of thing where I sort of expected like...'this is the crossroads right here' that place where you're either going to live or die right in that moment and just seperate yourself mentally enough to just accept and be willing to watch it...

 

....be willing to watch yourself do whatever it is one may do when it gets too much....if i make that call and wait for the sirens...i mean it's that intense..

 

....just b willing to go to what you know are ignorant of benzo doctors on the front lines in an emergency room...sure to get a pscyh referral and loaded up on whatever...OR be considered a drug addict while they load you up on drugs...

 

...it doesn't even feel organ specific or  'area specific' it's internal like being tazed at a low boil...like mild but persistent electrocution...being percolated.....being hooked up to a super tens machine with those sticky things everywhere and just set to brew....

 

...it's more than an annoyance or 'event' it's like as tough as you are, and resolved as you are...you are going down anyway...it's kind of taking me out of the game entirely...kind of feeling. it's pretty despairing...it's almost pristine in it's all encompassing absolutely persistent intense flutter-buzzing...it's like being cooked at a slow boil without heat...your entire organism is a blender...or maybe tazed and electicity is the best metaphor...

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Hi Tracy, I'm sorry you go through that horror, thanks heaps for sharing

 

Hi Beelyboy, you have painted a very vivid picture of what your waves are like. It sounds absolutely  catastrophic. The morbid thoughts you mention, I get them too and the thoughts about rescue dosing and reinstating - heck yeah. I was so close to a rescue dose today, so close. I hope your waves turn to only windows.

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I'm in a wave right now.  Don't realize I am going into one until it hits really hard.  Symptoms....lots of crying, shaking, can't get out of my own head, feel hopeless..like I am never going to get better (though I am getting better...windows are lasting longer and feel so much better when I have them), my head/brain/neck just burns, skin is crawling..obviously in a bad panic attack.  I took my dog for a short walk and am now going to take down the Christmas tree...need to keep my brain busy.  It akes so much energy to 'push' through one of these.  All the best to you.  We will get through this.
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