Ashton manual.

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I've been reading the Ashton manual  again.

No wonder I feel sick, disconnected,  crazy.

Went from 2 mg xanax to 30 mg valium, that was a big cut. I almost had a meltdown. Could not walk, everything was just unreal.

Then after 2 months on 30 mg valium, my doc now cut from 30 mg valium to 15 m/day 

I haven't even stabled on 30 mg valium/day.

It's difficult to write in English, I understand it but to write,,,feels like I missed all classes in English.

 

Anyway, now I am cold and warm. Waves of terror, anxiety, my skin feel like it's to tight on my face.

I can't stand up, tv is a joke...Christmas screaming in my face. It can't be healthy to just sit and shake.

Started to clean the house mumbling to my husband that I have to clean up here if the ambulance have to come and pick me up

The house is spotless and I fall when I start to do anything. This is awful.

My BP is low then it goes up when I talk (??)

My husband plans to go to my doctor tomorrow and demand a tapper plan.

I dunno what to think about that. Maybe the doc will be mad at me but my husband don't give a sh*t about that, he can't stand seeing me like this.

Feels like I'm out of control. Want my life back.

Tomorrow is a new day with even more BD.

Feeling so fragile and messed up.

Reading succes stories gives me hope.

 

 

 

 

[[jr...]]

In my opinion, I would present the Ashton Manual to my doc and ask him what he would do if he was in your shoes. And if that fails, there are other docs. When I reached tolerance in dec 2014, I went to my doc and he flipped out and sent me to the ER where they pump me full of Ativan. I ended up joining a CBT group and told them my situation and their pdoc immediately increased my meds so I could stabilize. Very lucky I suppose. I have been seeing the pdoc ever since.

[[Sh...]]

Hi Me2

 

Your written English is excellent but I will say Valkommen anyway.  I am sad for your reason to be here, but you have come to the right place for understanding and support.

 

I'm sorry you are suffering so badly.  All of your symptoms are pretty common in benzo withdrawal.  Many of us here on the forum have also been victims of the medical profession who first prescribe these pills and then are ignorant of the proper methods of tapering them off.  You are not alone!

 

I am so glad that your husband plans to accompany you to your doctor appointment.  You need an advocate more than ever right now.  Someone who loves you and has your best interests at heart and can speak up and be firm on your behalf.  Many times during this journey our poor befuddled nervous systems just won't let us think clearly or communicate clearly and be confrontational when that is what we need to be.  So kudos to him for supporting you this way.

 

Me2, you will be okay.  I can hear your sense of humor coming through despite your misery, that little spark that says "hello, this isn't really me, the real me is still in here despite all this".  You will get through this.  You will get off this poison and reclaim yourself and your life.

 

I'm sending you positive thoughts and vibes across the pond, vibes for hope and help and healing and the strength to hold on for the journey.

 

She

[Guest [su...]]

I am from Sweden too. Send me a PM!

[Guest [su...]]

I've been reading the Ashton manual  again.

No wonder I feel sick, disconnected,  crazy.

Went from 2 mg xanax to 30 mg valium, that was a big cut. I almost had a meltdown. Could not walk, everything was just unreal.

Then after 2 months on 30 mg valium, my doc now cut from 30 mg valium to 15 m/day 

I haven't even stabled on 30 mg valium/day.

It's difficult to write in English, I understand it but to write,,,feels like I missed all classes in English.

 

Anyway, now I am cold and warm. Waves of terror, anxiety, my skin feel like it's to tight on my face.

I can't stand up, tv is a joke...Christmas screaming in my face. It can't be healthy to just sit and shake.

Started to clean the house mumbling to my husband that I have to clean up here if the ambulance have to come and pick me up

The house is spotless and I fall when I start to do anything. This is awful.

My BP is low then it goes up when I talk (??)

My husband plans to go to my doctor tomorrow and demand a tapper plan.

I dunno what to think about that. Maybe the doc will be mad at me but my husband don't give a sh*t about that, he can't stand seeing me like this.

Feels like I'm out of control. Want my life back.

Tomorrow is a new day with even more BD.

Feeling so fragile and messed up.

Reading succes stories gives me hope.

 

 

 

 

 

The crazy part is our doctors in Sweden they don't understand or even want to understand what benzo or taper this poison is. Cut 15 mg in 2 months is insane. My doctor told me to go CT on my Valium from 20 mg. She is not just a doctor under practice.

 

I was a real bit** and lose it on my doctors office. I was so angry and upset and I have report her to (here comes a Swedish word, where people can complain on their doctors IVO instutionen för vård & omsorg).She is now very soft and listen to me. We are following The Ashton Manual. She had no clue. I put it in her hands.

 

It is not strange at all that you feel like this. I cut way to much for 15 days ago. Imagine...it was only 1,25 mg and I have a living hell today. If you wish send me an PM.I will respond to you. My BP is also low. Valium can cause low BP. 

 

It will be OK and you to. But I guess your crazy doc has to do something.Tell your husband to say he will report it to IVO or that you need a second opinion. Who put you on Xanax? The same doc? I think the dose you cross over to is equal to 20 mg of Valium?

 

I have talked to RFHL in Uppsala it is a place for people who suffer from benzo and antidepressive. Recommend you that. Talk to Staffan he is super. Give great support to. I call him when I need support.

 

I saw a clip with Heather Ashton she said cut 1 mg/month. In some case and when you hit 5 mg you need to even go slower. Ashton says cut 10 % of the dose you are using. For many is maybe 5 % enough. Or liquid daily microtaper by 0.03 mg/day...or less. Var rädd om dig! //Sun

[[...]]

In my opinion, I would present the Ashton Manual to my doc and ask him what he would do if he was in your shoes. And if that fails, there are other docs. When I reached tolerance in dec 2014, I went to my doc and he flipped out and sent me to the ER where they pump me full of Ativan. I ended up joining a CBT group and told them my situation and their pdoc immediately increased my meds so I could stabilize. Very lucky I suppose. I have been seeing the pdoc ever since.

Hello Jr 50898,

Thank you for input. I did show the Ashton Manual to my doc today. The answer I got was: " Nah you will not be ill. Cutting from 30 mg valium down to 15 is NOT a big cut!".

I could barely walk, talk and looked like a mess. I cried, my husband tried to speak to this doc that didn't help.

I'm so out of it. Didn't even get a new appointment. That idiot doc just want to get rid of me now.

I have to say that this doc is not the one who precribed xanax. I have had 3 different doctors in the last year.

Same office, different doc's. They come and go.

So now I'm supposed to be happy with 15 mg until Christmas day. I don't know if I will get a new recipe of valium after that.

My husband will go there tomorrow, he's very angry.

I have friends who have been treated the same by doctors. CT from benzo is rather common here.

I will trie o get a private doc and start a taper. Not that easy though this time of the year.

Lucky you with a pdoc that understands.

Take care now.

 

 

[[Be...]]

I would caution that the Ashton Manual is actually too fast for a lot of people. Certainly the 1mg a fortnight schedule. It gave me a false sense of what was possible that really screwed my decision making up.

I keep hearing that Scandinavia has the harshest benzo policies! Very strange.

[[...]]

Hi Me2

 

Your written English is excellent but I will say Valkommen anyway.  I am sad for your reason to be here, but you have come to the right place for understanding and support.

 

I'm sorry you are suffering so badly.  All of your symptoms are pretty common in benzo withdrawal.  Many of us here on the forum have also been victims of the medical profession who first prescribe these pills and then are ignorant of the proper methods of tapering them off.  You are not alone!

 

I am so glad that your husband plans to accompany you to your doctor appointment.  You need an advocate more than ever right now.  Someone who loves you and has your best interests at heart and can speak up and be firm on your behalf.  Many times during this journey our poor befuddled nervous systems just won't let us think clearly or communicate clearly and be confrontational when that is what we need to be.  So kudos to him for supporting you this way.

 

Me2, you will be okay.  I can hear your sense of humor coming through despite your misery, that little spark that says "hello, this isn't really me, the real me is still in here despite all this".  You will get through this.  You will get off this poison and reclaim yourself and your life.

 

I'm sending you positive thoughts and vibes across the pond, vibes for hope and help and healing and the strength to hold on for the journey.

 

She

 

Thank you SheWhomust:)

Went to see the doc today. I wrote about that further down. Not a good appointment at all.

Yes I do have a sense of humor, otherwise one can just give up.

Didn't laugh a lot today though. Just wanted to scream at my doc. Instead I cried and talked about my misery.

My husband and dear friends support me alot. I'm greatful for that.

Now it's 23.25 in Sweden I will try to sleep. What a joke..sleep 

Take care for now 

 

 

[[...]]

I am from Sweden too. Send me a PM!

 

You are so right in everything Sun!

Sweden sucks big time when it comes to benzo withdrawal.

PM in swedish ( easier  )

 

[[be...]]

Wish I could help but you definitely need another doctor. What you're being put through is unnecessary and must be absolute hell. Let your husband be your advocate as much as possible. Often as bad as this sounds when our husbands get mad (particularly with male doctors) the results are usually better than what we can handle ourselves. I'm so lucky because my doctor is absolutely fantastic. Understanding and truly cares. Sadly that's rare. But what you've described goes beyond ignorance. It's downright malpractice or it should be. You need to fight...uphill battles and all. It's hard but I did and managed to get the treatment plan I needed. The doctors I needed. Lots of support here in the meantime. Don't give up. B

[[...]]

I would caution that the Ashton Manual is actually too fast for a lot of people. Certainly the 1mg a fortnight schedule. It gave me a false sense of what was possible that really screwed my decision making up.

I keep hearing that Scandinavia has the harshest benzo policies! Very strange.

Belfast2016, I'm so sorry what you have been trough by reading your signature.

Well my Swedish doc told me that Ashton Manual is nothing to read. I can just jump from 30 to 15 mg without getting sick

Of course that is wrong. I might end up at the ER on Christmas Eve.

I don't know so much about the rest of Scandinavia and benzo policies but here in Sweden it's very harsh. It's cruel.

The doctors happily give out SSRI,SNRI and anti psychotic med for everything. As long it's no benzo.

People take there lives, end up in the ER or just bying it online.

I will not take my life or buy anything online.

Now I'm just mad as h*ll and tired.

 

Thank you, take care for now.

Bedtime here.

[[...]]

Thank you so very much Barb 

You are a fighter I can tell

 

Yes I need another doctor. My husband is beyond angry now.

I'm a wreck and have to wait until after the holidays to try to get a proper doctor and tapper plan.

I'm 49 but feel like 110 now. So drained.

You have truly made a long journey through benzo withdrawal and doing it so well!

Oh your doctor sounds like a dream. I will keep you posted about my journey.

Now it's bedtime. My husband have to work and come home to this wreck of a woman

 

Thank you for your nice input, take care for now 

[Guest [su...]]

Swedish doctors are sent from hell that's 4 sure. Put a friend in a rehab to become clean from 40 mg of Valium in 10 days...What happens? Relapse and buy benzo on the black market as a drugaddict...They have no clue about taper or even what w/d benzo cause. Ask a Swedish doc about PAWS. They wont understand it or what it is...Our souls is sold to the companys who put this poison for doc's to prescribe

[[...]]

Swedish doctors are sent from hell that's 4 sure. Put a friend in a rehab to become clean from 40 mg of Valium in 10 days...What happens? Relapse and buy benzo on the black market as a drugaddict...They have no clue about taper or even what w/d benzo cause. Ask a Swedish doc about PAWS. They wont understand it or what it is...Our souls is sold to the companys who put this poison for doc's to prescribe

 

Agree with you. Swedish doctors doesn't know a thing about benzo withdrawal. They don't  want to know. So sorry to hear what your friend been trough.

Not uncommon in this country. One of my friends went to detox in hospital, way to fast tappering. My friend came out from hospital with a psychos caused by the ridiculous fast tappering