To flush or not to flush...

[[Ex...]]

The other day I was looking for eye drops in my medicine cabinet, and I spotted those damn pills. I could feel disappointment in myself and rage towards my doctor overtake me. I've heard some buddies flushed their pills and others decided to hold on to them. Through all of the hell I've been through, although I knew I had them, there was no way in hell I was going back to them, that thought never crossed my mind. However I think at the start of my taper I feared I would have to reinstate at some point, but when I saw the reality of those pills, I just couldn't do it, I couldn't start over again - so what about you guys- to flush or not to flush, that is the question? 

[[er...]]

Maybe give them to a friend to hold. Maybe make some kind of agreement that he/she would only give you so many in case of an emergency. Just a thought.

[[Sh...]]

Get rid of the pills.  You are 3 months post jump and all risk of withdrawals have passed.  I wish I had gotten rid of my stash the first time and I wouldn't be here now.  Having that bottle in my bedside drawer was too much in a weak moment and here I am again.  Get rid of the pills.  Just my opinion.

 

She

[[me...]]

I agree, if you can find a way to make them very difficult to get to, like having someone you trust hold onto them for you, that could be a good way to go. That's what I did, I had to have a very good explanation to get ahold of any.

 

But DO NOT FLUSH--medicines don't just disappear, they go into the water system, and most are impossible to remove. That means all the wildlife using that water are exposed to our old meds, not good. Unbelievable amounts of common medicines can be measured in many water systems. Take any unwanted medicine to a pharmacist and they will dispose of them safely for you.

[[Sh...]]

I agree, if you can find a way to make them very difficult to get to, like having someone you trust hold onto them for you, that could be a good way to go. That's what I did, I had to have a very good explanation to get ahold of any.

 

But DO NOT FLUSH--medicines don't just disappear, they go into the water system, and most are impossible to remove. That means all the wildlife using that water are exposed to our old meds, not good. Unbelievable amounts of common medicines can be measured in many water systems. Take any unwanted medicine to a pharmacist and they will dispose of them safely for you.

 

Agree DO NOT FLUSH.  Here's how I got rid of mine and its how the FDA says you can safely do it.

 

Crush up the pills.  Mix them in something unpalatable such as coffee grounds or kitty litter.  Put them in a sealed plastic bag.  Throw them into your usual household trash.

 

She

[[2t...]]

I have thought about this but not yet made a decision as I am still some months away from jumping.

One thought I had was to put them for a while in my storage locker, its a few miles away and would need some effort on my part to go and get them.

As a side not, how insidious are these things when you can taper over many months to a small percentage of your starting dose and then still get hit with withdrawal bad enough to make you want to take them again?

[[Sh...]]

I have thought about this but not yet made a decision as I am still some months away from jumping.

One thought I had was to put them for a while in my storage locker, its a few miles away and would need some effort on my part to go and get them.

As a side not, how insidious are these things when you can taper over many months to a small percentage of your starting dose and then still get hit with withdrawal bad enough to make you want to take them again?

 

No amount of misery during acute made me want to take them again.  The pain and suffering and awful power of these poisons was fresh in my mind and I knew the only way was forward and staying off.  No, my weak time was 2 years down the road when the memories of just how bad it had been had faded.  I was feeling pretty good and then a health crisis came up and along with that, high anxiety.  I felt like I could just take them rarely and sparingly and no repercussions.  WRONG.  So much faster and so much worse the second time around.  I wish I had gotten rid of them the first time around.  I don't really see the point of just making them harder to get at once the dangers of withdrawal have passed and you're safely off.  IMO, they are still there for the taking.

 

She

[[Ex...]]

Maybe give them to a friend to hold. Maybe make some kind of agreement that he/she would only give you so many in case of an emergency. Just a thought.

 

That's a really good idea. I can see how that would be very helpful. I couldn't imagine me ever wanting to reinstate, but I will never say never...

[[Ex...]]

Get rid of the pills.  You are 3 months post jump and all risk of withdrawals have passed.  I wish I had gotten rid of my stash the first time and I wouldn't be here now.  Having that bottle in my bedside drawer was too much in a weak moment and here I am again.  Get rid of the pills.  Just my opinion.

 

She

 

Sorry to ear that She. I can imagine how tough it is to stop and then in a weak moment, reinstate. I can't lie, about a month ago, I didn't do it, but I the thought ran across my mind, but I'm glad I didn't do it. I'm glad you are trying it again to get off of those damn things. I think getting rid of them is a good idea. Good luck to you She.

[[Ex...]]

I agree, if you can find a way to make them very difficult to get to, like having someone you trust hold onto them for you, that could be a good way to go. That's what I did, I had to have a very good explanation to get ahold of any.

 

But DO NOT FLUSH--medicines don't just disappear, they go into the water system, and most are impossible to remove. That means all the wildlife using that water are exposed to our old meds, not good. Unbelievable amounts of common medicines can be measured in many water systems. Take any unwanted medicine to a pharmacist and they will dispose of them safely for you.

 

That was my concern, I wasn't really sure what to do with them, or how to dispose of them properly, but taking them to a pharmacist sounds like a good idea. Thanks for that.

[[Ex...]]

I have thought about this but not yet made a decision as I am still some months away from jumping.

One thought I had was to put them for a while in my storage locker, its a few miles away and would need some effort on my part to go and get them.

As a side not, how insidious are these things when you can taper over many months to a small percentage of your starting dose and then still get hit with withdrawal bad enough to make you want to take them again?

 

Taking them to a storage locker away from your home is a smart idea. I think that could work for some. You should try that and see how it works. You are so right, when I thought I was out of the woods, I started to feel 100 percent and then BAM I got hit and I can't lie, the thought of reinstating did pop up. But although I've had them, I haven't thought about them, and really they are all in little pieces so I think I might have 2 pills, but they are cut up from my taper. I think I might just take them to a pharmacist and let them dispose of them for me.

[[ho...]]

I'm 3 months out but still feel bad I hope I slowly get there

[[Ex...]]

I'm 3 months out but still feel bad I hope I slowly get there

 

I'm positive you will start to feel better, just hang in there. You're doing great, the hardest part is over

[[Bl...]]

I also feel if I had gotten rid of the pills when I first tapered I would not be here now.

[Guest [Ka...]]

Hi. I wrote a farewell letter to Xanax, and told her exactly why she is not allowed in my house anymore...I think it's important to remember  how bad things were when on it (for me) and how crazy difficult life/tolerance/withdrawal was. People tend to forget how bad it was while "using". It's natural to want to put it all behind you and move forward. I do. But, if it's addictive, I'd keep a letter around to remind yourself how bad it really was. I wouldn't keep any type of "problem substance" in the house. I don't know about the other benzodiazepines; Xanax is insidious and tricky...and so is my head sometimes. If a drug calls your name, get rid of it. Karuna

[[Ex...]]

I also feel if I had gotten rid of the pills when I first tapered I would not be here now.

 

I'm sorry you had to go through this again,  Im sure this time you will be successful.  Did you flush the pills this time?

[[Ex...]]

Hi. I wrote a farewell letter to Xanax, and told her exactly why she is not allowed in my house anymore...I think it's important to remember  how bad things were when on it (for me) and how crazy difficult life/tolerance/withdrawal was. People tend to forget how bad it was while "using". It's natural to want to put it all behind you and move forward. I do. But, if it's addictive, I'd keep a letter around to remind yourself how bad it really was. I wouldn't keep any type of "problem substance" in the house. I don't know about the other benzodiazepines; Xanax is insidious and tricky...and so is my head sometimes. If a drug calls your name, get rid of it. Karuna

 

That is such a good idea, and you're right,  after putting this behind us, it's likely we won't remember the entire intense journey, I think I will journal this just for that purpose. I will be getting rid of mine,  although I haven't thought about them lately,  I think it's just a good idea, for later on down the road. Thanks for that.

[[Bl...]]

Well, I am tapering so I cannot flush, but when done with the taper I defintely will! Sigh.

I am also at a particularly hard point in this taper with waves that really rock me.

I have to keep working so I really rely on the posts here to keep me going!