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I feel as bad to say as I ever have


[Ra...]

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I could really use some uplifting messages. I know so many would rather hear positive stuff, but I am not in that place right now. I worry about asking for help, but I really need it to get through this day.

 

So if you have any words of encouragement that you are willing to share, I would love to hear them. Not just for me, but for anyone who needs them today and reads this.

 

Thank you.

 

~R

 

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You'll have bad days, I haven't had a break in two months. But what ca car do but fight as best we can. Distract yourself as best you can and Believe we will heal. Hugs
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Ranomi I I'm a mess today too so don't feel bad about not being positive. That feeling comes and goes a lot. Yesterday was dreadful. I'm alone cuz hubby off to Ontario till Friday, my puppy wouldn't go to bed last night, I'm cleaning up after painters because there's white ceiling dust all over, my legs are jello but I'm forced to do all this by myself. I'm swamped, overwhelmed and I hurt my hip pretty bad on the step ladder. I just nailed a nail in the wall and it's crooked but I can't get it out with my fingers and I can't find a bloody hammer. I'm using a meat pounder for nails to hang stuff back up. I've got 3 more big...very big rooms to mop the hardwood floor and on and on. I can't eat cuz I feel to sick and shaky. I want to shoot my dog but he's only 9 months so not his fault. My skin is scalding and I'm on day 5 of a cut. But guess what. What can I'd do? Absolutely nothing. I refuse to updose no matter what. I feel like I'm going to pass out or something. So am I having a positive day. NO. But, I know tomorrow is a new day and I never give up hope that it will be better. This morning my joints and muscles were so sore I had to pry open my fingers when I woke up. Ranomi this is withdrawal plain and simple. We've all been where you are and do understand. Never hesitate to post about it. This is a great support group. Just hang in there it will get better. You just have to believe that it will.

So there's my rant. Letting you know you are not alone.  :smitten: B P.S. I'm also so dirty and sweaty it's disgusting and I finally had that glorious shower 2 days ago. Well, I'm not having one tonight. Just can't. I've had to do 5 loads of laundry too...bloody white dust everywhere. Maybe I'll just crawl in and do me as my final load of laundry. Better yet throw my pup in. He's dirty too. You'll be ok Ranomi. We all will.

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Ranomi I I'm a mess today too so don't feel bad about not being positive. That feeling comes and goes a lot. Yesterday was dreadful. I'm alone cuz hubby off to Ontario till Friday, my puppy wouldn't go to bed last night, I'm cleaning up after painters because there's white ceiling dust all over, my legs are jello but I'm forced to do all this by myself. I'm swamped, overwhelmed and I hurt my hip pretty bad on the step ladder. I just nailed a nail in the wall and it's crooked but I can't get it out with my fingers and I can't find a bloody hammer. I'm using a meat pounder for nails to hang stuff back up. I've got 3 more big...very big rooms to mop the hardwood floor and on and on. I can't eat cuz I feel to sick and shaky. I want to shoot my dog but he's only 9 months so not his fault. My skin is scalding and I'm on day 5 of a cut. But guess what. What can I'd do? Absolutely nothing. I refuse to updose no matter what. I feel like I'm going to pass out or something. So am I having a positive day. NO. But, I know tomorrow is a new day and I never give up hope that it will be better. This morning my joints and muscles were so sore I had to pry open my fingers when I woke up. Ranomi this is withdrawal plain and simple. We've all been where you are and do understand. Never hesitate to post about it. This is a great support group. Just hang in there it will get better. You just have to believe that it will.

So there's my rant. Letting you know you are not alone.  :smitten: B P.S. I'm also so dirty and sweaty it's disgusting and I finally had that glorious shower 2 days ago. Well, I'm not having one tonight. Just can't. I've had to do 5 loads of laundry too...bloody white dust everywhere. Maybe I'll just crawl in and do me as my final load of laundry. Better yet throw my pup in. He's dirty too. You'll be ok Ranomi. We all will.

 

BB, you are a dynamo and an inspiration. It seem like you are facing this head on, but setting limits on what you can do, too. Gumption. That's what I'd call it. I hope you will be okay til your hubby gets home.

 

I try to stay positive but allow myself to be duped by the thinking.

 

I'll keep trying, every day.  And when I can't, I'll reach out.

 

:)

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So sorry you are feeling bad, Ranomi.

 

Things will get better.

 

:hug:

 

Thanks for reaching out. It means a lot.  :)

 

Hang in there Ranomi .....hang on VERY tight...you are doing great each day is another day closer and closer to better days  :) :) :) :)

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Lol Ranomi. Gumption? That's a great word and thanks for the kind words. It's just important you reach out. No matter how trivial you think your issues are. They mean the world to you and that's what matters.  So big issues or little just hang on. Sometimes we have to hang on by our fingernails. But I'm sure you have better days ahead. Just understand they are waiting for you. I've folded for the day...exhausted so hoping I'll sleep ok tonight. Just sitting with the pup (I didn't shoot him...no gun) watching the new fall shows on tv. But hey, made it through the day. You can do this but no need to focus on being positive when some days we just can't. But alas the next day may be filled with sunshine. So hang on tight.  :smitten: B
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So sorry you are feeling bad, Ranomi.

 

Things will get better.

 

:hug:

 

Thanks for reaching out. It means a lot.  :)

 

Hang in there Ranomi .....hang on VERY tight...you are doing great each day is another day closer and closer to better days  :) :) :) :)

 

BeatBenzos, Ok, I'll hold on.  You, too, And all who may read your words.  Yes, one day at a time.  I have to keep reminding me self of that.  Breathe in, breathe out.

 

Peace and healing to all out there tonight.  :smitten:

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