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Saw a new pdoc today for full med eval.  As I suspected, she wanted me to take more meds. I told her I did not want any opiates, benzos, anti psychotics, anti seizure, anti depression, or any meds that had ANY withdrawal anything, but I would look at any options outside of that. I told her I wanted to have life skills to manage, not shove my emotions back in the box with chemicals.

 

She came up with....hydroxyzine.  An old med, antihistamine. No withdrawal, can take only when needed, doesn't hurt the organs. Only side effects that are common are dry mouth and some sleepiness. I told her I would consider ONLY after doing research on it. She said I might not find much as it was so old. Hello, has she heard of the internet? LOL  I'm considering it and did pick it up before leaving the clinic. It will be a last resort option.

 

I asked what she knew about benzo withdrawal. She told me a lot and it would take hours to explain. I asked for the 2 minute Readers Digest version. She didn't respond. She said I was a 'complex' case and that with a correct taper, it was easy.

 

I told her there were over 100,000 "Introductions" on this forum that was 10 years old.  That is over 10,000 new members each year on average. That didn't seem to me like it was easy. I told her my primary care was clueless and my counselor was clueless about the waves of panic I had been experiencing. Would she PLEASE talk with them and explain what the hell I'm going through. 

 

I left a printed copy of the 4 phases of withdrawal that is so common with the over 100,000 members of this site. I hope she does something!!!  I'm not sure she is used to a patient who does the homework to come in educated to the level we all are. I no longer call it 'doctors orders.'  I now use the phase 'doctors suggestions' as I have come to believe they are living in some world that is not from this planet. I guess we are all crazy and complex patients. BULLSHIT!!!

 

Oh, and she wants me to be open to meds in the future.  Meds that have a 'discontinuation window' (read addictive).

 

I'm not insane, they are.    :idiot:

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I SO hear you and feel the feelings and think the same thoughts. I've hit my limit with their BS and if in my lifetime I can do ANYTHING about the horrors we experience that I feel won't take me out or harm me further I shall.

 

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THEY do not like us because we are self educated and they are in the pill business....more often than not!

I like your post and attitude.

 

Yeah, they don't seem to care if they make us more sick... All that seems to be important to them is being 'right.' Even if they have to lie to themselves and everyone else so that they can be 'right' and never wrong or learning anything.

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I was told by a consulting nurse to not 'self diagnose' and only talk about my symptoms since they are the experts and it will shut them down. Wow, how about an intelligent dialog about me and my experience. I have found only a select few doctors who like to really dig in, not just look in a computer database for the 'corporate policy' of the clinic.

 

I've had strong debate using only logic and not emotions with my primary care when starting on LDN. I told him it was for off label use of a non toxic generic medication. He told me it was 'off label' because it's not approved by the FDA. I said, "you prescribed me propranolol for off label use for anxiety so that logic doesn't work.' When he said he couldn't prescribe LDN because of corporate I said, "the rhumatologist you sent me to in your next door office said they could prescribe I don't think it's a problem. Also saying corporate is not a medical answer, it's a policy answer and that is not acceptable to me." Thank God the rhumatologist is not a corporate slug!!!

 

If looks were daggers, I would have been stabbed. After I started getting my health back after getting LDN, he later told me in another visit that I looked better than he had seen me in a decade. Didn't he just validate my research and improvement that he didn't provide with his solutions? 

 

If I can, I will switch to a new plan this next calendar year. If I can't get out of the system, I'll switch to a new primary care. This is lunacy. There have to be some doctors out there who remember the Hippocratic oath they took when they got started.

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