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What kind ofta vision changes do u have or had? Mine are really bad. It makes me almost disabled. it's like I see but I do not . I can , for example, watch TV but I do not associate what I see. and I like that it becomes more dimisionellt when I look around at all I see . I am not present at all. does anyone recognize this . please i beg you to answer. it feels like I am going crazy for real. this is just psychological ? I have this all the time. It dosent go away. But I can go and stand and do stuff. So its not wrong with me in that way. My memory is really bad to. What happen for 5 seconds ago are gone. Cant even remember how my kids look like when Im thinking. And thats scares the hell of me.

 

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Hi Swedishgirl,

 

Have you heard of depersonalization/derealization? We usually just call it dp/dr around here, and it sounds like you're affected by it. It's the highly awful effect where everything seems fake, far away, unreal, and our bodies often seem floating, drifting, disconnected, and often other people seem ghostly as well (that is a problem I have). Dp/dr is a common and well-documented side-effect of benzo withdrawals. Look at the anxiety thread here, a group of us have been talking about dp/dr's effects on our brain during tapering and withdrawal. It is hellish, I know well first hand, but I assure it does fade away and life will return to how it seemed before. Don't take any rash action, please! It is not permanent, but like with a lot of these horrible side-effects, you need to be patient and calm (as possible).

 

Good luck!

Nemo

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I cant take this anymore, if this continues. I am not able to live more, i am on the limit,

 

 

 

Edit: Removed suicide reference

 

 

Dear Swedishgirl, :hug:

 

I am so sorry you are going through so much right now. I know it is hard to believe at the moment that life will be any other way than it is right now, but it does get better, believe me it really does.  Dig your heels in and keep distracting because you are going to see an end to this with  a little more time.  It will become more bearable, It happened for me and the same is coming for you,  you’ve got to hang on just for a while longer. 

 

I lived from moment to moment it was too much for me to look at the big picture, I kept it simple. Just keep going  as long as you have to, your life is very precious and you mean a lot to family and friends, even if it doesn't  feel that way right now.

 

Please take good care and if you for one minute think you might be compelled to act on any thoughts of self harm please get face to face help.  Call a friend, or your doctor, or go to your nearest emergency room.

 

You will find numbers to ring here:

Suicide, Self-harm Resources

 

We care about you

 

Magrita :smitten:

 

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It's like I'm just looking with one eye at a time and they do not work together o then there will be " distorted " image . It's like the eyes pointing in different directions . Can not explain it any better than that
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This is very common and will pass. It is extremely uncomfortable, so I understand your pain. Time will heal this symptom inevitably, but if you want to heal you gotta push yourself to do the things that make you uncomfortable. For me this kind of thinking and action facilitated me being able to sort of feel myself healing. Every time I pushed through a boundary healing took place. Whether it was going for a walk, whatever, just anything healthy. Try listening to audio books. Always helped when my eyes bothered me
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The doctor meant that this is not due to Benzon. It is to my mind is overworked o I'll try to put a note in front of one eye. I think there is something wrong with the eye muscles , because they do not cooperate. I know I do not see hallucinations, it is the eyes that are overworked . I feel it so strongly . Because I 'm not psychotic
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I think the eye thing will improve over time-at least to a a point where you can correctly assess any actual problems. Right now, your vision is severely compromised. There were significant shifts in perception and distortions when I first started. Ugh-Dizziness you wouldn't believe.

 

Or maybe you would believe it since you seem to be going through something similar. I had these involuntary eye twitches. Strange problems with not being able to focus properly, and it goes on and on. Even at the eye doctor a few days ago things didn't seem right.

 

After a full examination, the doctor, who I have been going to for 20 years, said everything was fine, more or less. What others have said about dp/dr is absolutely true, also. It will get better. I spent a month or two pretty much set on the fact that I would be insane for ever. And. that. does. not. feel. good.

 

We're all a little worse for the wear, but wearing it well. You begged me to respond,and I almost never respond. Now I'm begging you to  keep holding on. I'll be praying for ya'. Oh, and yeah eye muscles do get a bit overworked so it's important to rest them.

 

Good luck.

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[56...]

It's like I'm just looking with one eye at a time and they do not work together o then there will be " distorted " image . It's like the eyes pointing in different directions . Can not explain it any better than that

 

Hi Swedishgirl,

 

I'm so sorry you are going through this.

 

When I was around 27 I developed a problem like this and could no longer read with both eyes. Words appeared to be moving around on the page, and I simply could not chase them with my eyes because it made me sick and gave me terrible headaches. I had to cover one eye and read with the other.

 

Stress made it even worse, even though it was not a mental disorder - somehow during stress the eye muscles seemed to get more 'floppy.'

 

The problem was a nearpoint vision disorder that could immediately be fixed with prisms in glasses, even though I did not need glasses otherwise.

 

Years later I went for eye training, which solved the problem once and for all. Here is an article (a very wordy one) about the problems of visual disorders and stress. What is happening to you is not uncommon and may be totally fixable.

 

    Nearpoint Visual Stress

 

Please don't give up now - there is so much hope after benzos!  :thumbsup:

 

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