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PTSD and benzos, what can i do?


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So ive been through a lot in my life and I mean a lot! My mother was in and out of jail leaving me to be the adult when I was only 11 and I mean i'd cook, clean, and take care of my younger siblings. At 16 my step father was shot right in front of me and I honestly handled it fine, just like everytime my so called mom went to jail. At 17 I had my son and was still caring for my little sister. Now I truly believe what doesn't kill us makes us stronger until I got hit by a car. I was in a coma for 3 days with a bleeding and swollen brain and the right side of my face was completely shattered along with my eye socket! to be honest my face looked like the scream mask but thankfully an amazing team of doctors were able to reconstruct my face. After I got out of the hospital I started having anxiety, panic attacks, and my favorite flashbacks, and not just of the car accident but of all the horrible shit my piece of shit mother put me through. I seriously almost killed myself, I was re-living shit I already dealt with and even though the things happened years ago it felt like it happened yesterday! I was diagnosed with PTSD and put on klonopin 4 times a day and it helped  I was able to actually drive in a car without crying and I was able to go in a crowded place without feeling like I was gonna have heart attack. I was on them for a year and my piece of shit drug addict mother stole them from me and I thought oh nbd I'll just make sure to avoid crowded places and cars. yea I didn't realize that I became dependent on them, I wasn't able to get out of bed, I couldn't even seriously bring myself to take a shower! I also didn't sleep for two weeks straight. I don't know what the hell to do! I cant live with the ptsd and live a normal life but I also never wanna be in that situation again!
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  :) Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

You sure have been through a a lot. I am sorry for all of that. K should not really be taken for more than a few weeks for a variety reasons. One of them being that a dependency can develop in as little as two weeks. Taken long term they usually end up being a poor solution that they were originally prescribed for. You don't say how long ago it has been since you stop. The healing process can take some months, especially if they were stopped suddenly or too rapidly.

 

You might like to check out The Ashton Manual it is an authoritative source on what to expect in withdrawal and recovery.  Dr. Ashton is an expert in the field. 

 

Please feel free to post to any of the dedicated boards, we have a wonderful community of people here, who will give sound advice. Members have been through all aspects of benzodiazepine use and withdrawal and are more than willing to share their experiences.

 

Members discuss their symptoms on the Post withdrawal recovery support.

 

Please take the time to Create a Signature.  This will allow others to see where you are in the process so they can better support you.

 

Again Welcome!  :smitten:

 

benzos-R-cruel

 

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I'm glad you found an outlet here buddy, and i'm sorry to hear about you're struggles. Time will heal you my friend, make sure to surrounds yourself with the right people. Maybe you should talk to a doctor about the PTSD, there are alot of meds that could help you with that. You don't have to resort to benzo's, doctors often prescribe it beacause it's a "quick fix". There are other options out there that don't leave you with a hard addiction. And also there is therapy that can help.

I wish you all the best my friend!

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U have been thru a lot. I agree that benzos are not the answer for u. I would find a good counselor to help u sort out the mess that your mother caused. Benzos made me very sick.
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