12-18 month support

[[Gr...]]

Hi HH-- sadly yes, I've been reading on the main board and it seems many members can't take the mental torture so they reinstate. I know of one member who used to be with us on the 6-12 month thread, he was having a bout of insomnia and gave up and started taking serequol.. I haven't heard from him since. I honestly think more people than we realize end up back on benzos or some ad or psych drug.. Its so sad because they are really messing up their brains and kindling themselves.  Geez can I really relate on the body scanning thing. I'm so sick of thinking about sx all the time. I lay in bed and just scan my entire body for sx , its ridiculous. Anyhow, you sound a lot better today and that is good news.  Jenny

 

Drew-- I think you'd make a great dad, this is exciting stuff!

 

Jenny, I knew of one person who went back on valium and left shortly after that.  Haven't been able to contact him so I don't know how it turned out.  Wow, what you said up there, that's really scary.  I'm so glad all of us here have stuck it out.  It's so sad to think after all we've been through, giving up and going back on meds.  Thank God we support each other.  We've all been through it, we get that bad wave, that bad depression, and we lose hope.  Thank God every time it's happened to me, I've gotten support here and never reinstated, never went on psych meds.

 

I agree with you. If it weren't for this group I know I would have reinstated months ago. It's bigger than BB because if I only perused the main boards I would have reinstated. Way too much scariness out there! You guys have been my lifeline many times.

 

 

HH, you talked me down off a ledge in month 12. I was at the doctor's office.  Almost got a script.  That's how intense, how scary this shit gets.  I lost my mind. that's what happens to me in waves, I forget everything I know, I doubt.  It's almost like a form of mind control, it's that powerful. And then the storm is gone, over.  So just go slow, relax, distract.  Or have a very good cry.  sometimes that works.

[[He...]]

Hi Cindy and Robert! I'm glad you find information and comfort here. Feel free to jump in!

[[Gr...]]

Green,

That's interesting, and now that you said that, I know I've read it somewhere before. It's certainly been true in my case. I had a horrible wave in month 6 that crossed over into month 7 because it was almost a month long. But it ushered in a significantly higher baseline and things started to get better. Then I had the tough 12 month wave, again leading into more healing. As I've approached 18 months, things have been getting wavier....and hopefully it follows a similar pattern of significant gains afterwards! The other thing that I noticed is my big waves at these timeframes have been decreasing in length.  I guess I'll find out soon enough if this holds true! I'll keep you all informed.

 

That actually makes me feel quite hopeful!!

 

HH, that 12 month wave you talked me through, you sent me a post from your own wave at 12 months, which was horrific, because it was what I had, which might have been the worst I had been since acute.  I'm pretty sure it's the 18 month wave ( yes, we have waves for all occasions! )

 

Just go slow.  hopefully it won't have staying power. 

[[Gr...]]

Hey 12-18 month Buddies, Like Robert I am always following your posts, and thank you all for giving me such hope. Crazy benzo brain me could not wait until I joined you all in the 6-12 month thread never thinking with me being 6 months behind you all, I would never catch up with you all....I am praying there is no 18-24 month thread for you all, and if there is , it will just be a grateful I healed thread. Thanks for lighting the way for all of us behind you.

 

Love and healing to all of you, cindy

 

U 2, Cindy

[[pe...]]

Why are you scaring me with this 12 month wave talk?!?!

Freaking out about the freaking out that's to come.

 

Peace2

[[pe...]]

Ok. Just realized I'm in the 12th month. Just a couple weeks to go and things are shit, but not take me to the hospital bad. Hoping it doesn't get too much worse or for too long. I'll just sit here and hope, eat some raw garlic and drain the green snot from my nose. Are we having fun yet?!?

 

Peace2

Hey, maybe garlic is the secret cure to benzo withdrawal....

[[Gr...]]

Why are you scaring me with this 12 month wave talk?!?!

Freaking out about the freaking out that's to come.

 

Peace2

 

You're hanging out with the older kids.  don't be scared.

[[Gr...]]

Ok. Just realized I'm in the 12th month. Just a couple weeks to go and things are shit, but not take me to the hospital bad. Hoping it doesn't get too much worse or for too long. I'll just sit here and hope, eat some raw garlic and drain the green snot from my nose. Are we having fun yet?!?

Peace2

Hey, maybe garlic is the secret cure to benzo withdrawal....

I'll just sit here and hope, eat some raw garlic and drain the green snot from my nose. Are we having fun yet?!?

OMG, you're killing me tonight, lol  I haven't laughed like this in a while.  Having fun in withdrawal.

[[Gr...]]

Remember this?

 

 

This is from Dr. Meliemis in Canada who specializes in this field

 

"Post-acute withdrawal usually lasts for 2 years. This is one of the most important things you need to remember. If you are up to the challenge you can get through this. But if you think that post acute withdrawal will only last a few mos., then you will get caught off guard....

 

How to survive Post Acute Withdrawal

 

Be patient. Two years can feel like a long time if you are in a rush to get through it. You cant hurry recovery. But you can get through it one day at a time.

If you try to rush your recovery, or resent post-acute withdrawal, or try to bulldoze your way through, you will become exhausted.

 

Post-acute withdrawal symptoms are a sign that your brain IS recovering. They are the result of your brain chemistry gradually going back to normal, Therefor dont resent them, But remember, even one year, you may only be halfway there.

 

Go with the flow. Withdrawal symptoms are uncomfortable. But the more you resent them the worse they will seem. you will have lots of good days over the next two years. Enjoy them. You will also have alot of bad days. On those days,dont try to do to much. Take care of yourself,focus on your recovery,and you will get through this.

 

You will go through days or weeks without symptoms and then one day you will wake up and your withdrawal will hit you like a ton of bricks...if you are not prepared for it, if you think post-acute withdrawal only lasts a few mos., or if you think that you will be different and it will not be as bad for you , then you will get caught off guard. But if you know what to expect you can do this.

 

Practice self care. Give yourself lots of little breaks over the next two years. Tell yourself "what I am going through is enough". Be good to yourself. That is what you MUST learn in recovery.

Sometimes you will have little energy or enthusiasm for anything. Understand this and do not overbook your life. Give yourself permission to focus on your recovery.".....

 

Another good reassurance that all of this is normal and that we will all heal....

 

Take care of yourselves everyone.....m

[[...]]

Wishing each of you a very Happy New Year!!

 

:smitten: :smitten:

[[No...]]

Hi GMIT ... time to sweep 2014 under the rug and forget about it ... which may not be the correct attitude to have ... but I have it so I am sweeping ...

 

All the best for you and for all of us in 2015 ...

 

How are you keeping? ...

 

I am getting visited by this benzo gut pressure stuff again this morning, woke me up way too early, and I am grumpy ...

 

Hope you have a good day ...

 

 

 

[[Wi...]]

Greenice

 

Thank you so much for the reminder 

 

Wwwi

[[pe...]]

Good reminder, Green. And boy do I need to see it over and over and over.

 

Depression is less again this morning, hooray! But driving. Can we talk about driving for a second? It's so very hard and I know it's all the dr. My perception just feels so off and it's hard to stay calm while operating a huge machine and not having all of your wits. Anybody driving? Is it getting better? This driving thing surely adds to my tendency to stay home if my chauffeur (husband) is not willing to drive.

 

Peace2

[[...]]

Hi GMIT ... time to sweep 2014 under the rug and forget about it ... which may not be the correct attitude to have ... but I have it so I am sweeping ...

 

All the best for you and for all of us in 2015 ...

 

How are you keeping? ...

 

I am getting visited by this benzo gut pressure stuff again this morning, woke me up way too early, and I am grumpy ...

 

Hope you have a good day ...

 

 

I'm doing well, thanks! The cold/flu is ever so slowly getting better!

 

How are you?

 

[[Gr...]]

Good reminder, Green. And boy do I need to see it over and over and over.

 

Depression is less again this morning, hooray! But driving. Can we talk about driving for a second? It's so very hard and I know it's all the dr. My perception just feels so off and it's hard to stay calm while operating a huge machine and not having all of your wits. Anybody driving? Is it getting better? This driving thing surely adds to my tendency to stay home if my chauffeur (husband) is not willing to drive.

 

Peace2

 

Peace, where you are right now, it was my absolute worst, and then I turned a real corner, Coop, too. 

[[Sk...]]

Seems like a whole lot has been going on here !! Can't leave you guys along for one second !!

 

Peace, sorry about your cold, looks like you are having a rough time.

 

I am so tired and it's only quarter past 7 !! I took my dog out on two long walks, didn't realize they were long actually and now I am exhausted without having done anything !! I tried to nap for half an hour in the afternoon, but my cat felt like partying and would not let us be one minute, she was up to no good !! 

I will be gettting my period  soon, mr Sky wants to go in hiding when it comes !!!!

 

In the morning, I am bright and positive, by my standards of course. But towards three pm  on, I start trying to fight and then later on, calm down. WHen I pick fights, I think I am being so  reasonable, but I am not, I just watch things get worse. HOpe this gets better, poor mr Sky and my m om too, now and then gets an outburst, out of the blue.

 

We are celebrating New year's  at home, trying to comfort the cat and gog, here there are many fireworks, it gets out of control. After midnight I would like to take a spin to see the street celebrations, in the city square with music and all. But I am afraid I will miss  out on them, if I am already so tired.

It would mean a lot to me, but I can't overdo things, I am still so weak. Mr SKy is cooking so many yummy things. I also went to a virtual online new year party with virtual friends from around the world,w hich is all I can handle  now. 

 

Everybody, if I don't make it back to the boards, have a happy new year, this has been a difficult but amazing year, we're on the road to something good, I can feel it . There is still a lot to do, there will be many bumps on the road, but we're on the right track.

 

Hugs to you all.

 

[[No...]]

GMIT ... my cold ran almost three weeks ... seems it is mostly gone now ...

 

I am having a rough day ... got woken up at 1 am with gastro stuff that has not been around for a long while ... much like what I went through last April ... seems I am getting re-visited by some of the symptoms that have been dormant for a while ... nothing seems to hang around for a long time ... maybe a few hours ... the gastro stuff seems to have released and now I am dong my version of body anxiety ...

 

So ... not pleasant and not overwhelming ... onward and upward ... just muddling along today ...

 

[[dr...]]

Hi all... I didn't get a chance to read everything but I just want to wish everyone a better 2015!

 

Drew

 

Ps-the cardio office called and my consultation will be on the 8th!  Very happy I got an earlier date.

 

[[be...]]

You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.

Happy New Year!!

[[Sk...]]

You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.

Happy New Year!!

 

Absolutely !! 

[[He...]]

I'm signing up for the premium No Wave option in 2015...who's with me? 

[[mr...]]

I'm signing up for the premium No Wave option in 2015...who's with me? 

 

Okay, okay,...how much does it cost?

 

Really, though.  I am looking forward to 2015!  I am grateful for this past year, and VERY grateful that it is now the PAST!  For if the only way out is through, then I went through my 2014 with God's grace and help.  I no longer have to re-live this past year, thank you Jesus!  Onward to a much better 2015 ~ thank you LORD!  I lift us all up in prayer today, tonight, as we close out this year ~ let us all leave the past in the past; we now shake the dust from 2014 off our feet.  We now put on a new pair of shoes, ones that are prepared for our journey of 2015!  May this be the best year ever ~ I declare that everyone on this thread be 100% by no later than the close of 2015, and that each and every one of us comes back to write our success story for all to derive hope from   Amen, thank you Lord!

 

Beulah, you hit the nail on the head  

 

Happy New Year buddies  

 

Mrs.

[[je...]]

Lots of great posts! Wish I could comment on all of them, but my memory is crap today.. I know  I could not have gotten through 2014 without all of you, and i just know that 2015 is going to bring lots of healing our way!! I hope your all doing well tonight, onward!!  jenny

[[He...]]

I'm signing up for the premium No Wave option in 2015...who's with me? 

 

Okay, okay,...how much does it cost?

 

Really, though.  I am looking forward to 2015!  I am grateful for this past year, and VERY grateful that it is now the PAST!  For if the only way out is through, then I went through my 2014 with God's grace and help.  I no longer have to re-live this past year, thank you Jesus!  Onward to a much better 2015 ~ thank you LORD!  I lift us all up in prayer today, tonight, as we close out this year ~ let us all leave the past in the past; we now shake the dust from 2014 off our feet.  We now put on a new pair of shoes, ones that are prepared for our journey of 2015!  May this be the best year ever ~ I declare that everyone on this thread be 100% by no later than the close of 2015, and that each and every one of us comes back to write our success story for all to derive hope from   Amen, thank you Lord!

 

Beulah, you hit the nail on the head  

 

Happy New Year buddies  

 

Mrs.

 

I LOVE this, Mrs!! I second your declaration and am joining you in prayer. 

[[No...]]

Hi Folks ...

 

2014 is going out with a bang for me ... been in a storm since 1 AM ... I am finding this really hard right now ... sitting here wondering how I got through this for days and days back in acute ... and I am having this much difficulty hanging on for a few hours ...

 

Some distraction ... some tea ... trying not to get going too fast ... my gastro stuff has come back and I am having revving anxiety ... and the dp/dr stuff feels like it is coming on ...

 

Haven't slept well for a couple of days and I feel exhausted ...

 

This really sucks ...