12-18 month support

[[No...]]

Martinlake ... thanks for your post ... the more times I hear this stuff the better I feel ...

 

Be Well ... 

[[No...]]

Beulah ... okay ... soup season is coming soon ...

 

Split pea soup ...

Leek and potato soup ...

Any bean soup ...

Scotch broth ...

Onion soup ...

Chicken noodle ...

Clean out the fridge veggie soup ...

Garlic and tomato soup ...

Any squash or sweet potato soup ...

 

And ... to make stew, just thicken the soup of choice ... or if I make stew and it is too thin, I call it soup ...

 

 

[[No...]]

Coop ... if you want sweet potatoes ... and don't care for their taste ... make a sweet potato soup ...

 

Garlic, onions, lots of carrots, sweet potatoes, and broth ... sweat all the veggies for a while ... add the broth ... cook until soft ... puree ...

 

No seasonings necessary except perhaps a touch of salt to help the sweating bit ... a dash or six of lemon juice, added one dash at a time, really brings out a nice zing to any soup of this kind ...

 

 

 

[[No...]]

Peace ... usually good to engage any reassurance that has been helpful, past or present ...

 

And ... you are doing well, it may just not feel like some or most of the time ... 

[[No...]]

Sky ... so ... you sound quite good ... and are feeling kind of lousy ... that sure sounds like a lot of us ...

 

Your cognition stuff will clear up eventually ... we are all on a different "schedule" for the many things we are going through ...

 

Be Well ... 

[[No...]]

Hi Folks ... having a same old kind of day, just like the other ones these past couple of weeks ... bright, alert, sharp ... and physically feel lousy most of the time ... and I just get on with my day ...

 

Onward ... 

[[Co...]]

I am listing a few positives about today...hope you all don't mind

 

1. I am in month 17.  Regardless of how I feel right now I am closer to feeling well than not

2. I have seen many of my friends improve here.  I am not that different from them otherwise I wouldn't be in the same hell

3. My mornings are bad but my evenings are okay.  Even right now I feel much better than 30 minutes ago.  One thing is for sure...I can be positive        I won't feel the same thirty minutes from now.  Sometimes it's a blessing and others a curse.

4  My armpits aren't soaked with sweat as usual after a tough am(I'm stretching here )

5. this is temporary...as bad as we feel we always have to remember this. It is huge. 

6. Many have been down this path before and we are not exceptions to the healing process.

7. Once through this I will be so much healthier mentally, physically, and overall a person who appreciates being alive.  I am now living healthier    as oppsed to the unhealthy self destructive lifestyle before caused by the drugs.  I don't feel it yest but I am putting in the foundation to build upon

8.while right now I think feel the worst ever it is not the case.  While in the grip of tolerance withdrawal I was having more panic attacks and other stuff. 

9. I have the best people on this thead and a few others I communicate with who makes this hell bearable. :smitten: :smitten:   

 

......Drew,....this is so perfect....I am bookmarking it to save it.  I will be reading this over and over...  You are such a strong person about reining in your mind. Your posts regarding your mind practices are so helpful to the rest of us.

......#5  is so spot on.....Drew. you in that dessert of the last half of year 2..  You are going to get through this....and it won't be that much longer.....You are much better at pulling up the positives in the midst of a bad morning of anxiety than I am. I usually can't find the positive space in my mind unail it passes.

    .Thank you so much Drew for this post.......coop

[[...]]

Marj, you are one tough cookie !

 

I don't get that tingling and burning sensation, so I really can't say anything about it.

 

It sounds awful and quite scary.

 

It's true that  anxiety does wreck havocs on every single thing.

 

For me, it's not only painful, it also shuts my brain down and keeps me from doing anything, even access my coping tools.

 

Today, I had to go to the p ost office to withdraw some money. Mr SKy told me a zillion times how much I had to take, but when I got to the till, my brain went blank.

I can't remember my security numbers for my cards so I do this very dangerous thing of keeping a visiting card in my walled, together with my  cashcards, with all the numbers written there. Mr Sky, camouflages the numbers with others.

BUt, when I had to get the number I needed, of course I forgot that, and kept adding the whole numbers.

 

I just had to call mr Sky, get him to come over and help me out.

 

I know it sounds silly but it's a blow to my self esteem, this not being able to function completely by myself, my brain just can't do it.

 

It will come back, but I am sure, if I had not been anxious, I would have been able to do it much better.

 

HOpe this story makes sense.

 

From what I read, not many others here, have this level of cognitive impairment.

 

My mind is in a good place, my brain maybe not so good yet.

 

I have this anguish over the move, this sense of doom, usually when i am sleeping.

 

But, when I get engrossed in  things, I feel quite well.

 

I have gotten so used to vibrations and palps, they're still there, I am just not paying them any heed.

 

UNpleasant ? Yes, of course they are.

 

But wd gets you used to a daily amount of suffering and you give it for granted at some point.

 

Acceptance or resignation ? Whatever works, right ?

 

But I get so many intrusives, arrgh !

 

Ok, I have to go, I have to pretend I am helping out and then, I have two lessons.

 

Heal away, everyone. 

 

Sky, believe me I am not tough. I feel like a total wimp sometimes, complaining all the time. We just do our best I suppose.

 

Weird how we all have our stuff.  Anxiety is so strong going through this it causes some weird awful feelings. The getting engrossed in stuff is good when you can. I just can't wait to bumble along taking or leaving things to do instead of trying to keep busy to stop from focusing on how awful we feel.

 

How you are handling moving house I cannot imagine 

[[...]]

Drew, you are not stealing my thunder in any way. Take comfort in what you can 

 

I love your list. We have to try to reassure ourselves at times and that is a good way to do it 

[[dr...]]

coop-how do you bookmark a post?

 

Second storm of the day hitting as expected.  Lots of healing going on this week  

[[...]]

Hi Folks ... having a same old kind of day, just like the other ones these past couple of weeks ... bright, alert, sharp ... and physically feel lousy most of the time ... and I just get on with my day ...

 

Onward ... 

 

Can't do much more than that. Each day is one day............. then we arrive

[[No...]]

Marj ... that's all we can ask ... get through the day as best we can ... accumulate enough time and this will be over ... in the meantime deal with what shows up and try to stay kind to ourselves ... 

[[dr...]]

aaaaaaaand the 2nd storm is starting to fade.  This is some fast cycling of symptoms.  Definitely a wave  

[[63...]]

I am listing a few positives about today...hope you all don't mind

 

1. I am in month 17.  Regardless of how I feel right now I am closer to feeling well than not

2. I have seen many of my friends improve here.  I am not that different from them otherwise I wouldn't be in the same hell

3. My mornings are bad but my evenings are okay.  Even right now I feel much better than 30 minutes ago.  One thing is for sure...I can be positive        I won't feel the same thirty minutes from now.  Sometimes it's a blessing and others a curse.

4  My armpits aren't soaked with sweat as usual after a tough am(I'm stretching here )

5. this is temporary...as bad as we feel we always have to remember this. It is huge. 

6. Many have been down this path before and we are not exceptions to the healing process.

7. Once through this I will be so much healthier mentally, physically, and overall a person who appreciates being alive.  I am now living healthier    as oppsed to the unhealthy self destructive lifestyle before caused by the drugs.  I don't feel it yest but I am putting in the foundation to build upon

8.while right now I think feel the worst ever it is not the case.  While in the grip of tolerance withdrawal I was having more panic attacks and other stuff. 

9. I have the best people on this thead and a few others I communicate with who makes this hell bearable. :smitten: :smitten:   

 

Drew, these are good positives, very worthy of keeping in mind!

 

Hang in there brother! -R

[[Gr...]]

I read everybody's posts, and I want to tell you all how dear you are to me, every one of you.  I really am getting better, I feel it, but I'm in some kind of funk I can't shake off, for now anyway.  As I read, I was remembering how bad I felt when I was at 15, 16, 17, 18, even 19 and 20.  and I feel way better than I did.  I have myself back, which is a huge gift of healing. 

Whenever I lose gratitude and acceptance, I get my ass kicked.  It's happened so many times during this journey.  It happens when I have a date certain in my head, that I'm going to be better by so and so.  And then the ensuing struggle.  I remember the first success story I read that stressed, you're going to heal when you're going to heal, nothing will change that, it's on your body's timeline, and you can make it that much harder for yourself if you struggle and fight in that process.  That was the best advice I ever read on this site.  I took heed and accepted and made the best of my life during this process, and as hard as things got, it was the best way to go. 

For now, I have misplaced my acceptance, I'm struggling, frustrated with the time my body is taking to heal, and as a result I'm making things much harder for myself than they need to be, I think.

I'm so grateful to all of you, to this thread.  No one but you ppl here understand this. Dang, are we ever the most mizundastood people on the planet!

 

Have the best day possible, everyone.

P.S.  I have a phone conference with Baylissa tonight, 6 p.m. EST.  I'll let ya know what happens.  I need a damned flashlight on this leg of the trip!

 

[[so...]]

All of the posts on this thread are so positive.  Boy do I need positivity right now. I'm crumpled up in bed with a huge wave of vertigo, nausea and breathlessness.  I cannot understand feeling worse the longer I'm in this process!!! Grrrr.

 

Love and thanks to you all for the great posts.

 

Sofa

 

PS - I'm so self-pitying today.  Wishing God would take me and thinking I'm being punished for all my sins.  Every thought that comes across my mind is filled with panic and fear.  Why do I feel so horrible suddenly, so much worse than before?  Sorry for the negative rant.  You warriors put me to shame.

[[dr...]]

Hi guys...I just lost it. Finished work and had to get food. Got a panic attack in the store which carried over my whole freeway drive home. I even ran red light at a deserted intersection. In bed diubt calming exercises. 

 

I'm back to the point of wondering if it's the mag in the supp as this was the worst panic in months. It was ER level but I rationally know what is going on. I can take another migraine supp w all of the other ingredients except mag.  Think I may do that.  Feel so lost right now.

 

Oh...I'm sure the fight w my fiancé didn't help. 

 

Usually after these monster panics where I lose it I'm generally okay in a few days. It's almost like a reset button.  Even though I don't fear them sometimes they break through and all bets are off.

[[BJ...]]

How are your neck muscles, drew?  If they're tender to the touch, there is a fix for that.  I'm telling you, the myofascial stuff is underrated in withdrawal.  Hope you feel better.

[[so...]]

Drew,  I'm sorry you're being hit so hard.  Laying in bed and deep breathing is all I can do sometimes.  I take magnesium and it has a drowsy effect on me, but it is known to rev some people.  I take Dr.'s Best chelated mag.  Tried the citrate and it revved me.  The different types of magnesium work differently.  Your idea of removing it altogether might be best.

 

I lost 4 pounds in the past 3 days and felt so lousy today that I picked up something to eat at a restaurant close by.  Panic all the way there and back, so I know how you feel.  I hope you get some rest now that you're home.  Love to you, Sofa

[[dr...]]

Bj-I had a cranial massage yesterday.  There a bit tight as always. Will take a hot bath once I get my stress response down.

 

Sofa-on the mag I've had trouble a few times before and my doc thinks it's in my head. I can't find anything anywhere about mag revving people except here and I try to separate myself from indulidyal stories.  We agreed taking the other three supps without the mag is better wether it's psychological or not at this point.  He wants to do a double blind test on me

 

sorry your with me in the soup.  I was in whole foods and couldn't even buy any food I could eat for lunch. Cats got there food though.

 

 

[[dr...]]

Boy...I'm hogging the thread today. 

 

I may bow out of performing for the fall run.  I've continued to perform for the last three years but I'm torn now.  Baylissa and my therapist both said good and bad stress are not my friend at this point and limiting wherever you can is smart.  On the other hand, I feel like my world is getting smaller and smaller.  My therapist says it is for now but it's not permanent.  Hmmmm....I really want to be as well as possible for three months when I have my wedding.  So many unpleasant choices I have to make.

[[No...]]

Drew ... when you are weighing the performance stuff ... there is stress on one side of the ledger, and enjoyment on the other ... and ... the more I limited myself, the less I had to gauge my healing ...

 

Just a thought ...

[[Gr...]]

Boy...I'm hogging the thread today. 

 

I may bow out of performing for the fall run.  I've continued to perform for the last three years but I'm torn now.  Baylissa and my therapist both said good and bad stress are not my friend at this point and limiting wherever you can is smart.  On the other hand, I feel like my world is getting smaller and smaller.  My therapist says it is for now but it's not permanent.  Hmmmm....I really want to be as well as possible for three months when I have my wedding.  So many unpleasant choices I have to make.

 

Drew, I totally relate to "my world getting smaller and smaller."  I've got to cancel my cycling trip, the stress I'm putting on myself is ridiculous.  And it's not permanent, we are going to heal, I know I am, you are.  We just have to give our bodies this time to heal.

[[No...]]

Green ... well ... weird little place we find ourselves in ... just have to let some more time pass, I guess ...

 

I have sort of reconciled myself to shopping for food, cooking, cleaning, some rug stuff, and walking ...

 

I am also gradually working on some stuff for the Fall ... don't know if I will "action" it or not this Fall, but it is giving me a sense of doing something at least ...

[[be...]]

Bj-I had a cranial massage yesterday.  There a bit tight as always. Will take a hot bath once I get my stress response down.

 

Sofa-on the mag I've had trouble a few times before and my doc thinks it's in my head. I can't find anything anywhere about mag revving people except here and I try to separate myself from indulidyal stories.  We agreed taking the other three supps without the mag is better wether it's psychological or not at this point.  He wants to do a double blind test on me

 

sorry your with me in the soup.  I was in whole foods and couldn't even buy any food I could eat for lunch. Cats got there food though.

 

Hey drew, sorry you're having a rough day. I can't touch magnesium, I've tried several kinds..Drs.Best and the multivitamins really rev me up and cause panic. It calms my muscle pain..but not worth it.

 

Well, as long as the cats got fed.