12-18 month support

[[Gr...]]

Morning all,

 

I seem to be moving out of the " mother" of all waves. I got really discouraged in my thinking that this shouldn't be happening at 2 yrs. off..little do I know. Since this withdrawal journey began my husband has been by by side and never gone for more than a few hrs. to run errands. The other day when my tsunami of a wave began I asked him if he would spend a couple of days at our daughters..that I needed some alone time for the healing of the wave...and I don't know why. He was concerned and didn't want to leave me alone..but I convinced him that everything would be ok and he could call me when he wanted.

For two days I cried, prayed, cursed, paced, took many baths, played music to soothe my soul.

While I think the alone time helped me I still had the fear of being alone...and not understanding why I need the time..maybe emotional healing ..I don't know.

I don't feel like I came out on top..but I guess I did..I fought for my life..and Won!!!

 

We all know it's not over till it's over...so much truth.  🎶 This is my fight life🎶

 

Beulah, these late waves are very disheartening. awful, really.  I'm sort of living in one myself right now, so I relate to the misery and sense of isolation.  I, too, want to be alone when I'm suffering, kind of like a dog who crawls into a corner until he feels better.

Beulah, people get bad waves right up until the time they heal.  Hopefully that time is coming for you, and for all of us, very soon.   It's very nice to have you back. we all missed you.

[[Gr...]]

Hi Folks ... just having a plain old rough time ... not thinking well enough to respond to posts ...

 

Later ... take care every one ... we will get out of this stuff ... 

 

Nova, this is a terrible place to be.  I'm with you.  Hoping it lets up.  yes, it's awful.  we old timers seem to be getting our arses kicked, eh?

 

Feel better, my friend.  we will emerge from this shit storm, on my word.  We are all going to make it.  As long as it takes.

[[Mi...]]

I'm with all you guys....this late in the game it's rough to deal with.

 

I went to a concert last Saturday, been in a wave since last Monday, plus I quit smoking on Tuesday....no butts in 5 days.....smoked a pack a day.  Cold turkey.  I'm struggling to make sense out of so many things, plus I have so much anger inside right now.  Can't deal with anyone, so tired, just want to be alone.  Feel like my best friend died.  Feel like I want to run.  Feel like I want to sleep.  Who the hell knows what I feel! 

 

It's all going to be over in the near future, I have absolute faith in that.  Till then a basketcase I will be.

 

[[dr...]]

Great job on no cigs in five days Mike.  At least you can chalk up feeling bad to that. Lol

 

Yup..,acceptance with our eye on the prize.  Today I seem okay with my crappiness and have abandoned any timeline including two years. It is what is until it isn't.  Oh...this acceptance is subject to change on a dime.

[[Co...]]

Yep..." acceptance subject to change on a dime"....says it all...

[[Ka...]]

Morning all,

 

I seem to be moving out of the " mother" of all waves. I got really discouraged in my thinking that this shouldn't be happening at 2 yrs. off..little do I know. Since this withdrawal journey began my husband has been by by side and never gone for more than a few hrs. to run errands. The other day when my tsunami of a wave began I asked him if he would spend a couple of days at our daughters..that I needed some alone time for the healing of the wave...and I don't know why. He was concerned and didn't want to leave me alone..but I convinced him that everything would be ok and he could call me when he wanted.

For two days I cried, prayed, cursed, paced, took many baths, played music to soothe my soul.

While I think the alone time helped me I still had the fear of being alone...and not understanding why I need the time..maybe emotional healing ..I don't know.

I don't feel like I came out on top..but I guess I did..I fought for my life..and Won!!!

 

We all know it's not over till it's over...so much truth.  🎶 This is my fight life🎶

 

......Oh, Beulah....dear dear friend....I  so sorry that you got " drug through the thorny wastelands by your hair"..  ..sounds like a dark dark night of the soul. Glad you cried and wailed and gnash ed your teeth.. .W/D really drags us around and the intrusive thoughts and fears re-opens old wounds and grief. If I was in your city I would have brought lavender honey tea and lemon cookies and left them at your door....know that in my mind I did that.  I so sincerely hope this is the infamous tsunami wave before complete healing. I am so glad that you feel like it is spinning itself out.  Much love to you Beulah......coop

 

Hello,

 

Is there a tsunami wave before complete healing?  I am almost at 13 months and all physical symptoms seems to have gone except the darn brain symptoms.  It feels like my brain wants to escape from the inside - the pounding, intrusive thoughts, loneliness, boredom, described in many previous posts is all too familiar.  I hope the brain symptoms are the last ones....

 

Healing Wishes to all,

 

Kantu

 

[[Ko...]]

Korbe....thanks so much for the encouragement on the prilosec.  You are right ....we should at least be able to eat...if not lattes and chocolate, at least some reasonable normal food. ....I am so sorry that your legs hurt so much. Beulah had a terrible time with her legs...they are better now.

    We are having tough times ....after months of healing. Still, I think I am so much better now than I was last summer. ...We are going to make it all the way to the end of this Korbe, you are right not to fight the bad days. Just take extra care and patience with what you can and can't do on wavy days. It's so hard not to resist the need to go low and slow but it pays,off I think .

.....What grade level did you teach?. . I miss my work so much . I loved every single day. ..A principle.  That takes such dedication.....and huge ability. I bet you miss it to.

.....We really are rounding the corner Korbe.  Hold on and hang with us....we are all doing this together..  Wishing you a better day today.    coop

 

 

Thanks again for your always positive posts. Second night no acid reflux. The Prilosec really works.

Now if my legs would stop hurting I'd be in pretty good shape.  I'm still sleeping in the day time. Don't know why. I do get akathesia at night and that definitely keeps me awake. I get it in my legs, usually just one, very weird.

    As far as school, No I really don't miss it.  Maybe the social aspects but not the work. I taught high school & middle school. Same district for 35 yrs.  what I do miss is my life before Benzos, which involved a lot of traveling, going to movies, plays, musicals and visiting with my friends around the country.  Being stuck in my house for 2&1/2 years is ridiculous.

I know we'll get better soon. In the mean time I'm going to bitch and moan. Hope you get a new window soon.

 

[[Ko...]]

Morning all,

 

I seem to be moving out of the " mother" of all waves. I got really discouraged in my thinking that this shouldn't be happening at 2 yrs. off..little do I know. Since this withdrawal journey began my husband has been by by side and never gone for more than a few hrs. to run errands. The other day when my tsunami of a wave began I asked him if he would spend a couple of days at our daughters..that I needed some alone time for the healing of the wave...and I don't know why. He was concerned and didn't want to leave me alone..but I convinced him that everything would be ok and he could call me when he wanted.

For two days I cried, prayed, cursed, paced, took many baths, played music to soothe my soul.

While I think the alone time helped me I still had the fear of being alone...and not understanding why I need the time..maybe emotional healing ..I don't know.

I don't feel like I came out on top..but I guess I did..I fought for my life..and Won!!!

 

We all know it's not over till it's over...so much truth.  🎶 This is my fight life🎶

 

 

Beula, I'm so sorry you got hit with a wave, especially being two years out. This is so discouraging for you and all of us. I hope it lifts soon and you are back feeling like new.

Korbe

[[Gr...]]

Korbe....thanks so much for the encouragement on the prilosec.  You are right ....we should at least be able to eat...if not lattes and chocolate, at least some reasonable normal food. ....I am so sorry that your legs hurt so much. Beulah had a terrible time with her legs...they are better now.

    We are having tough times ....after months of healing. Still, I think I am so much better now than I was last summer. ...We are going to make it all the way to the end of this Korbe, you are right not to fight the bad days. Just take extra care and patience with what you can and can't do on wavy days. It's so hard not to resist the need to go low and slow but it pays,off I think .

.....What grade level did you teach?. . I miss my work so much . I loved every single day. ..A principle.  That takes such dedication.....and huge ability. I bet you miss it to.

.....We really are rounding the corner Korbe.  Hold on and hang with us....we are all doing this together..  Wishing you a better day today.    coop

 

 

Thanks again for your always positive posts. Second night no acid reflux. The Prilosec really works.

Now if my legs would stop hurting I'd be in pretty good shape.  I'm still sleeping in the day time. Don't know why. I do get akathesia at night and that definitely keeps me awake. I get it in my legs, usually just one, very weird.

    As far as school, No I really don't miss it.  Maybe the social aspects but not the work. I taught high school & middle school. Same district for 35 yrs.  what I do miss is my life before Benzos, which involved a lot of traveling, going to movies, plays, musicals and visiting with my friends around the country.  Being stuck in my house for 2&1/2 years is ridiculous.

I know we'll get better soon. In the mean time I'm going to bitch and moan. Hope you get a new window soon.

 

 

Korbe, I've got the same thing going on, I'm up until 7-8 a.m., akathisia, not every night, but enough to make bedtime a misery. and once I fall asleep, I'm sleeping quite a bit.  It feels like something is happening.  I would like to think it's healing.  I think it's a good sign that we all share symptoms at approx. the same time out.  It means it's not as random as it feels, and that there's some kind of pattern, and hopefully it all leads toward healing.  yes, this is ridiculous, you should be doing the things you like.  Also, I think getting pissed off is going around now, too. 

 

P.S.  Do you think there's anything we can do to get on a normal schedule? 

[[Gr...]]

Morning all,

 

I seem to be moving out of the " mother" of all waves. I got really discouraged in my thinking that this shouldn't be happening at 2 yrs. off..little do I know. Since this withdrawal journey began my husband has been by by side and never gone for more than a few hrs. to run errands. The other day when my tsunami of a wave began I asked him if he would spend a couple of days at our daughters..that I needed some alone time for the healing of the wave...and I don't know why. He was concerned and didn't want to leave me alone..but I convinced him that everything would be ok and he could call me when he wanted.

For two days I cried, prayed, cursed, paced, took many baths, played music to soothe my soul.

While I think the alone time helped me I still had the fear of being alone...and not understanding why I need the time..maybe emotional healing ..I don't know.

I don't feel like I came out on top..but I guess I did..I fought for my life..and Won!!!

 

We all know it's not over till it's over...so much truth.  🎶 This is my fight life🎶

 

......Oh, Beulah....dear dear friend....I  so sorry that you got " drug through the thorny wastelands by your hair"..  ..sounds like a dark dark night of the soul. Glad you cried and wailed and gnash ed your teeth.. .W/D really drags us around and the intrusive thoughts and fears re-opens old wounds and grief. If I was in your city I would have brought lavender honey tea and lemon cookies and left them at your door....know that in my mind I did that.  I so sincerely hope this is the infamous tsunami wave before complete healing. I am so glad that you feel like it is spinning itself out.  Much love to you Beulah......coop

 

Hello,

 

Is there a tsunami wave before complete healing?  I am almost at 13 months and all physical symptoms seems to have gone except the darn brain symptoms.  It feels like my brain wants to escape from the inside - the pounding, intrusive thoughts, loneliness, boredom, described in many previous posts is all too familiar.  I hope the brain symptoms are the last ones....

 

Healing Wishes to all,

 

Kantu

 

Kantu, yes, the mental symptoms were intense for me around month 13, I can remember.  It gets so much better.  Hang in. So glad to hear the physical symptoms have left for you.

[[Ko...]]

Green,

 

I know how you feel. Sometimes I've been so angry I just wanted to punch the wall or call an attorney.  Finally, I realized it was a waste of energy and nobody wanted to hear about it. So, I decided to just accept what was happening.  I still keep up with Benzo in the news section and copy all the articles that may help me one day when I go on my planned letter writing campaign to draw attention to our cause.  The longer I read this stuff the more I feel no one will listen.  Everyone has been bought by Big Pharma. But, perhaps if I can find someone with power to champion our cause we might have a chance. I'm just not well enough todo it right now.

 

BTW I suffer from akathesia almost every night. It left for a while but now it's back. Going for a short walk helps the most. If it's just in one leg I put an ice back on my butt on that side & then pace, or stretch.  I slept today from 8:30 to 4 with one break to walk the dog.

Hope you have a window soon.

 

[[Ko...]]

Coop,

I forgot to tell you to google Advil side effects. Advil is ibuprofen. You'll be shocked at all the things they cause. I'm trying to avoid them now.

 

Now I take coated aspirin. I better google that.

[[Gr...]]

Green,

 

I know how you feel. Sometimes I've been so angry I just wanted to punch the wall or call an attorney.  Finally, I realized it was a waste of energy and nobody wanted to hear about it. So, I decided to just accept what was happening.  I still keep up with Benzo in the news section and copy all the articles that may help me one day when I go on my planned letter writing campaign to draw attention to our cause.  The longer I read this stuff the more I feel no one will listen.  Everyone has been bought by Big Pharma. But, perhaps if I can find someone with power to champion our cause we might have a chance. I'm just not well enough todo it right now.

 

BTW I suffer from akathesia almost every night. It left for a while but now it's back. Going for a short walk helps the most. If it's just in one leg I put an ice back on my butt on that side & then pace, or stretch.  I slept today from 8:30 to 4 with one break to walk the dog.

Hope you have a window soon.

 

Korbe,  I can't believe we had the same sleeping hours today!  I was 8 to 3 p.m., lol.  I just add a postscript to my last post.  do you think there's anything we can do to get us back on schedule?  days and nights I mean?  I'm afraid to do anything.  I'm grateful to sleep at all. 

 

The akathisia is a very hard symptom.  I get mine deep in the pelvis, at what I would call my core?  in yoga I think it's the first chakra, lol

 

Well, Korbe, in your travels on the Internet, look up whistleblowing, psych drugs, on youtube.  there's a tremendous amount of information.  apparently drug reps are filing suits against the companies all the time, with the govt. as a joint plaintiff.  that's how whistleblowing works.    the companies are paying billions in fines, only we barely hear about it, because the press apparently is complicit in keeping it quiet.  I spent a whole angry bad symptom day accumulating info, instead of reading protracted stories and making myself feel worse.  And I came back full out outraged indignation.  There are so many poor people sick from their medication, we are def not the only ones.

And I've been watching one mass shooting after another on T.V.  what do all of these shooters have in common?  they're all on psych drugs.  Robin Williams was on major psych drugs.  One of the Columbine shooters was on psych drugs.  His parents are suing the pharm. co.  What's happening to us is very bad, yes.  but there are literally people dying out there because of these drugs, being shot, murdered in movie theaters.    Families and communities are being destroyed.  This is much bigger than us benzo wd survivors. 

 

Meantime, we have to feel better, we have to heal.  And I have no problem being an activist after this, lol.  I will buy postage stamps for your letters. feel better.  our anger will get us through

[[Gr...]]

Coop,

I forgot to tell you to google Advil side effects. Advil is ibuprofen. You'll be shocked at all the things they cause. I'm trying to avoid them now.

 

Now I take coated aspirin. I better google that.

 

16,000 people a year die from NSAID GI bleeds. 

[[Ko...]]

Coop & green,

 

I just looked up aspirin side effects and guess what besides causing GI bleeding it causes excess stomach acid. No wonder my acid reflux came back, I've been taking Aspirin instead of Advil.  Now I guess Tylenol is my only choice. Problem is it doesn't work for pain for me. Now what?

 

Green,

I think there is away to retrain your sleeping time.  I read about it on the Insomnia section. I'm not ready to try it though. Just enjoying sleeping anytime for now.

 

BTW Ithink everyone one of those crazy shooters was on Benzo plus other stuff.

[[Gr...]]

Coop & green,

 

I just looked up aspirin side effects and guess what besides causing GI bleeding it causes excess stomach acid. No wonder my acid reflux came back, I've been taking Aspirin instead of Advil.  Now I guess Tylenol is my only choice. Problem is it doesn't work for pain for me. Now what?

 

Green,

I think there is away to retrain your sleeping time.  I read about it on the Insomnia section. I'm not ready to try it though. Just enjoying sleeping anytime for now.

 

BTW Ithink everyone one of those crazy shooters was on Benzo plus other stuff.

 

K, I was surprised you were taking aspirin.  I stopped taking it years ago.  It bothered my stomach even when I was very young. You're right, though, it's the best thing for pain.  actually the best thing for pain is naproxen, which will burn a very big whole in your tummy.

 

I'm not ready for sleep retraining either, still just enjoying getting it.  although it's a bummer because I'm starting to wake up pretty close to dinner time.

have you thought about Advil, temporarily?  Not as bad as aspirin.

[[Fi...]]

I have some thoughts on pain, for what they're worth to anybody.  I came to this whole thing through massive, tortuous pain following total knee replacement surgery.  I'd had a lot of surgeries and broken bones before this, but never pain of this magnitude.  I now think it was because I was on Lexapro and a tiny dose of Xanax, and those combined to block the effects of the narcotics.  I couldn't figure out why I was having to take the maximum doses for so long just to be free of torture while other patients were just shrugging it off.

 

Continual pain is part of opioid withdrawal, and I went through a period of what's called hyperalgesia which means your body has become hyper sensitive to pain.  I had a headache for eight months that came on every day around three.  For several months I was taking the maximum doses of both ibuprofen and Tylenol, just trying for some control over it.  I was able to stop this when I figured out for myself that the pain was partly due to spiking blood pressure.  Getting my BP under control helped with the headache. 

 

As for the continual random aches and pains that we all seem to suffer with benzo withdrawal, I quit taking the OTC meds when I came to understand the bad effects they have on us, plus the fact that they really don't give that much relief, right?

 

I now believe that our brains are wired to deal with pain just as they're wired to deal with anxiety.  We do make our own natural opiates.  I began thinking of it as tolerating the pain just as you'd tolerate the anxiety without popping a benzo, just something you go through while your brain heals itself.  It saves a lot of mental energy to stop casting about for the drug that will fix you without causing side effects, since everything does.  Also, even OTC drugs can produce the same rebound pain as a narcotic.  It makes sense, after all. Your body doesn't know which analgesic has been prescribed and which was over the counter!  For me, my heating pad has been the most reliable source of comfort.  I rarely even take ibuprofen.  I got through my broken ankle in January with just a few doses. 

 

I am coming up on two years off of Xanax and two and a half years off of Oxycodone.  It's been almost three years since the surgery that plunged me into intense physical pain.  Today I felt 100% well.  No physical pain at all. Worked all day in the woods limbing trees.  Healing happens. Our brains and bodies WANT to heal.  When I was younger, I used to feel that any pain I had should be immediately medicated or operated upon. I've done a complete turnaround, realizing that pain is so much more complex.  I now know it's about our brain's wiring and that is something that will heal.

 

For those in pain, hang in there.  It does get better, with time as the only remedy.

[[No...]]

Good Morning ... "kind of like a dog who crawls into a corner until he feels better" ... bow wow ...

 

Got pretty whacked around with the physical stuff for a couple of days ... just had to wait it out ...

 

Things seemed to have cleared out and now I feel exhausted and hung over ... same old stuff, different weekend ...

 

It is Monday ... time for a good long walk ... hope we all have a better day ... 

[[Sk...]]

Coop,

I forgot to tell you to google Advil side effects. Advil is ibuprofen. You'll be shocked at all the things they cause. I'm trying to avoid them now.

 

Now I take coated aspirin. I better google that.

 

This is all very interesting, but too much info for me now. I really want to know all of this, have all of the information, when I have the brain to retain it and act on it.

 

Thanks for sharing.

 

FJ, I think you have a point about Pain management and it's something I am quite interested in.

[[Sk...]]

Good Morning ... "kind of like a dog who crawls into a corner until he feels better" ... bow wow ...

 

Got pretty whacked around with the physical stuff for a couple of days ... just had to wait it out ...

 

Things seemed to have cleared out and now I feel exhausted and hung over ... same old stuff, different weekend ...

 

It is Monday ... time for a good long walk ... hope we all have a better day ... 

 

NOva, hope your walk helps a little and your day gets better.

 

Btw, we are at page 1000 of the thread !

[[BJ...]]

I have some thoughts on pain, for what they're worth to anybody.  I came to this whole thing through massive, tortuous pain following total knee replacement surgery.  I'd had a lot of surgeries and broken bones before this, but never pain of this magnitude.  I now think it was because I was on Lexapro and a tiny dose of Xanax, and those combined to block the effects of the narcotics.  I couldn't figure out why I was having to take the maximum doses for so long just to be free of torture while other patients were just shrugging it off.

 

Continual pain is part of opioid withdrawal, and I went through a period of what's called hyperalgesia which means your body has become hyper sensitive to pain.  I had a headache for eight months that came on every day around three.  For several months I was taking the maximum doses of both ibuprofen and Tylenol, just trying for some control over it.  I was able to stop this when I figured out for myself that the pain was partly due to spiking blood pressure.  Getting my BP under control helped with the headache. 

 

As for the continual random aches and pains that we all seem to suffer with benzo withdrawal, I quit taking the OTC meds when I came to understand the bad effects they have on us, plus the fact that they really don't give that much relief, right?

 

I now believe that our brains are wired to deal with pain just as they're wired to deal with anxiety.  We do make our own natural opiates.  I began thinking of it as tolerating the pain just as you'd tolerate the anxiety without popping a benzo, just something you go through while your brain heals itself.  It saves a lot of mental energy to stop casting about for the drug that will fix you without causing side effects, since everything does.  Also, even OTC drugs can produce the same rebound pain as a narcotic.  It makes sense, after all. Your body doesn't know which analgesic has been prescribed and which was over the counter!  For me, my heating pad has been the most reliable source of comfort.  I rarely even take ibuprofen.  I got through my broken ankle in January with just a few doses. 

 

I am coming up on two years off of Xanax and two and a half years off of Oxycodone.  It's been almost three years since the surgery that plunged me into intense physical pain.  Today I felt 100% well.  No physical pain at all. Worked all day in the woods limbing trees.  Healing happens. Our brains and bodies WANT to heal.  When I was younger, I used to feel that any pain I had should be immediately medicated or operated upon. I've done a complete turnaround, realizing that pain is so much more complex.  I now know it's about our brain's wiring and that is something that will heal.

 

For those in pain, hang in there.  It does get better, with time as the only remedy.

 

This is a nice perspective to read.  I think you're right.  The more we worry and obsess over pain the worse it feels.  That's been my perspective as well.  I've become supersensitive to even the slightest discomforts.  I seldom take anything for it.  Just work on self-massage more than anything else.  Keeping the muscles relaxed in any way possible works the best for me at easing symptoms.

 

Otherwise, I still feel rather poor this morning.  Achy neck, shoulders, and head.  Sinus stuffiness that fails to relent.  Moderate anxiety.  Full week of work ahead.  Month 15 rocks!

 

Keep meaning to ask this.  When any of you gets the shallow breathing feeling, what does it feel like?  Is it manifested as chest breathing?  Or is it a sensation of muscle tightness in the chest?  Is it anxiety?  Just curious.  I have it going this morning out of nowhere.  I'm not really too anxious, but just kind of feel tight in the chest.

[[Fi...]]

BJJAmes--you bring up another good point about pain that I didn't really get into, and that's the emotional component to it.  Pain that has worry attached to it is worse, right?  This was always true for me long before benzos came into my life.  If you think the pain is a sign of something else that ought to be looked into it makes it not only hurt, it's also frightening.  So, to the extent that, during healing from withdrawal, we can accept that the pains are signs of the brain making adjustments to get us to a better place, the pain can still hurt, but it doesn't have to be quite so scary and trigger panic.  Pain also has a strong link to depression, and for me, that would probably be because my sick and  oh-so-quick train of thought would always tell me that if I had pain, I would ALWAYS have pain, that this is the beginning of the end, it's always downhill from here.  Well, now I've lived enough years to know that THIS JUST ISN'T TRUE.  Pain can and does resolve itself, and this can happen without drugs or surgery.  For me, the randomness of the pain during withdrawal has made it easier to hang onto the belief that it's just something in my brain's wiring misfiring.  I could have really alarming sharp pains in some part of my body, but I KNEW if I presented myself for x-ray, CATscan or whatever, they would find nothing.  So I never asked them to go looking and the pain went away.  I think this would have been harder if I'd had persistent pain in one specific spot, but sharp as the pains could be, they were always random and never lasted in in one place longer than a few days.

[[Aq...]]

So where do we go after 18 months?

 

Still going....feeling   

[[Fi...]]

Well, you can  go read the protracted board, which I started doing a long time a go, but it looks like this group is probably staying right here until healed, so nobody's telling you to sign off!

[[Sk...]]

I have some thoughts on pain, for what they're worth to anybody.  I came to this whole thing through massive, tortuous pain following total knee replacement surgery.  I'd had a lot of surgeries and broken bones before this, but never pain of this magnitude.  I now think it was because I was on Lexapro and a tiny dose of Xanax, and those combined to block the effects of the narcotics.  I couldn't figure out why I was having to take the maximum doses for so long just to be free of torture while other patients were just shrugging it off.

 

Continual pain is part of opioid withdrawal, and I went through a period of what's called hyperalgesia which means your body has become hyper sensitive to pain.  I had a headache for eight months that came on every day around three.  For several months I was taking the maximum doses of both ibuprofen and Tylenol, just trying for some control over it.  I was able to stop this when I figured out for myself that the pain was partly due to spiking blood pressure.  Getting my BP under control helped with the headache. 

 

As for the continual random aches and pains that we all seem to suffer with benzo withdrawal, I quit taking the OTC meds when I came to understand the bad effects they have on us, plus the fact that they really don't give that much relief, right?

 

I now believe that our brains are wired to deal with pain just as they're wired to deal with anxiety.  We do make our own natural opiates.  I began thinking of it as tolerating the pain just as you'd tolerate the anxiety without popping a benzo, just something you go through while your brain heals itself.  It saves a lot of mental energy to stop casting about for the drug that will fix you without causing side effects, since everything does.  Also, even OTC drugs can produce the same rebound pain as a narcotic.  It makes sense, after all. Your body doesn't know which analgesic has been prescribed and which was over the counter!  For me, my heating pad has been the most reliable source of comfort.  I rarely even take ibuprofen.  I got through my broken ankle in January with just a few doses. 

 

I am coming up on two years off of Xanax and two and a half years off of Oxycodone.  It's been almost three years since the surgery that plunged me into intense physical pain.  Today I felt 100% well.  No physical pain at all. Worked all day in the woods limbing trees.  Healing happens. Our brains and bodies WANT to heal.  When I was younger, I used to feel that any pain I had should be immediately medicated or operated upon. I've done a complete turnaround, realizing that pain is so much more complex.  I now know it's about our brain's wiring and that is something that will heal.

 

For those in pain, hang in there.  It does get better, with time as the only remedy.

 

This is a nice perspective to read.  I think you're right.  The more we worry and obsess over pain the worse it feels.  That's been my perspective as well.  I've become supersensitive to even the slightest discomforts.  I seldom take anything for it.  Just work on self-massage more than anything else.  Keeping the muscles relaxed in any way possible works the best for me at easing symptoms.

 

Otherwise, I still feel rather poor this morning.  Achy neck, shoulders, and head.  Sinus stuffiness that fails to relent.  Moderate anxiety.  Full week of work ahead.  Month 15 rocks!

 

Keep meaning to ask this. When any of you gets the shallow breathing feeling, what does it feel like?  Is it manifested as chest breathing?  Or is it a sensation of muscle tightness in the chest?  Is it anxiety?  Just curious.  I have it going this morning out of nowhere.  I'm not really too anxious, but just kind of feel tight in the chest.

 

I have it now, I would say it's a nxiety of some kind. Probably just chemical anxiety, there  may not be a cause. 

 

SOrry to hear you are having it today.