12-18 month support

[[No...]]

Good Evening ... congrats to all the anniversary folks ... 

 

I seem to be climbing out of my funk ... just didn't give a damn about most things for a couple of days ... when I find myself in that space I just go quiet for a while ...

 

Hope we all have a quiet evening ... 

[[je...]]

Hi Nova,

Glad to hear your doing a little better. I was exactly the same way a few months back, I couldn't post at all... I was in too much of a negative space, and didn't have much to offer anyone. I get it.. Good to hear from you, this thread isn't the same without you and Coop 

[[be...]]

Good evening Nova, as Jenny said.."we get it". Sometimes we just need a break from here when we hit those rough patches. Good you are climbing out of your funk. Hope the evening is restful for you.

[[Co...]]

Hi buddies...I have been off the thread for a little bit.  My life ( my life aside from w/d) just got scrambled. I am joining Sky in her housing go around. ...My complex was bought by a new company....my lease is due in Aug. ...the rent was increased way beyond my means.  I am in absolute shock!!...I have lived here for 4 years.  I am kind of paralyzed. There is a slight possibility of negotiations for another 12 month lease..but I have been informed that rents will probably continue to increase by 50$ each lease..  A year would at least give me adequate time to transition. GAW!!.    Ironically....my sx have been tame today .  The lease stress feels like normal situational panic...not the sheer chemical anxiety...how wierd is that

.....Sorry buddies, I just don't have the clarity or focus to follow the posts from yesterday and tomorrow.  I am thinking of everyone... more to follow when I can think again...sending wishes for sunbreaks to all....coop

[[Co...]]

Nova, glad you are back.  Happy to hear that your funk is fading... send cookies please...I need many...with chocolate in them....coop

[[do...]]

Chalis recommended I join this thread. I am heading into my 12 month. I made some audios I sent to a friend on this site. I had my worst day today and I am very scared. My audios convey what was going on for me this morning. If you decide to respond please be very, very gentle with me. I cant handle any anger or people who may be upset with me. I freak out. I am extremely sensitive to any mild form of criticism or scolding.

 

http://chirb.it/L3vJke 

 

http://chirb.it/sGDP2s 

[[je...]]

Hi buddies...I have been off the thread for a little bit.  My life ( my life aside from w/d) just got scrambled. I am joining Sky in her housing go around. ...My complex was bought by a new company....my lease is due in Aug. ...the rent was increased way beyond my means.  I am in absolute shock!!...I have lived here for 4 years.  I am kind of paralyzed. There is a slight possibility of negotiations for another 12 month lease..but I have been informed that rents will probably continue to increase by 50$ each lease..  A year would at least give me adequate time to transition. GAW!!.    Ironically....my sx have been tame today .  The lease stress feels like normal situational panic...not the sheer chemical anxiety...how wierd is that

.....Sorry buddies, I just don't have the clarity or focus to follow the posts from yesterday and tomorrow.  I am thinking of everyone... more to follow when I can think again...sending wishes for sunbreaks to all....coop

 

 

 

Wow Coop, that must have come as quite a shock.. I hope everything works out, let us know how it goes. You sound good though, despite all the stress. Hugs, jenny

[[mr...]]

Chalis recommended I join this thread. I am heading into my 12 month. I made some audios I sent to a friend on this site. I had my worst day today and I am very scared. My audios convey what was going on for me this morning. If you decide to respond please be very, very gentle with me. I cant handle any anger or people who may be upset with me. I freak out. I am extremely sensitive to any mild form of criticism or scolding.

 

http://chirb.it/L3vJke 

 

http://chirb.it/sGDP2s

 

Hiya D!

 

Welcome to the thread! I am sure you will find this thread wonderfully comforting No "scolding" here! 

 

I have not listened to your audios, as in the past I have been a bit "sensitive" to "scary" or "negative" stimuli, LOL, but I can relate to your "sensitivity" to a particular stimuli like that! Rest assured that it will all go away, with time! (hooray, can't wait!!) My "sensitivity" is SO much better & improving all the time! I am *almost* to the spot where I can start watching "suspense" or "drama" movies again! This is saying LOTS for me, considering where I was

 

Anyways, I just wanted to say hi and welcome you Hope your night is going great! Sleep well & we'll chat soon

 

Mrs.

[[be...]]

Chalis recommended I join this thread. I am heading into my 12 month. I made some audios I sent to a friend on this site. I had my worst day today and I am very scared. My audios convey what was going on for me this morning. If you decide to respond please be very, very gentle with me. I cant handle any anger or people who may be upset with me. I freak out. I am extremely sensitive to any mild form of criticism or scolding.

 

http://chirb.it/L3vJke 

 

http://chirb.it/sGDP2s

 

Welcome dolphins. I listened to your audios and they broke my heart. I also saw that you were on 9 mgs. xanax...that's a large dose to come off of.

You spoke of not being able to feel your true self, I don't think any of us do.

Congrats on getting to year one.. That's a huge accomplishment. Year one is very difficult to get through..but you did it.

Yes, the depression that comes with the territory of withdrawal is a struggle ..but we manage to take it very slowly here..day by day we fight those ugly fears and intrusive thought that loom in our brains.

 

So, you are able to drive..I can't do that yet..and you are able to drink coffee..wow, I also can't do that.

At the end of next month I will be off 2yrs., while their is still a lot I can't do..also a lot that I can.

I don't think you're any different than anyone else in withdrawal..it just feels it...you've had a rough year.

I could hear the anxiety in your voice,the withdrawal is famous for that.

Everyone hear is very kind and supportive with a pinch of humor thrown in at times.

Relax, you are safe here.  Our motto is ..low and slow. Rest easy tonight.

[[be...]]

Coop, Glad to see you on here and feeling a bit better. Sorry about the apartment takeover, hope you are able to stay another year.

We had to sell our house and move to an apartment..because withdrawal happened.

Try not to worry, it all works out, worry does us no good.

Get some sleep so that you can help celebrate my big day tomorrow..oops today..it's after midnight.

This is a milestone month for me. Turning 60 and 2 yrs. off in the same month.

Ok, I better get off here and rest my weary bones..now that I'm older.

[[Ko...]]

Hi team,

I'm a little slow on posting again, but I do try to read and keep up with everyone. Had a rough week, with no sleep and extreme Boatiness. Just haven't felt like doing anything. I think some depression has returned too.  I too feel like crying at times and do, but probably not enough. I'll be starting my 20th month on July 2. I'm hoping to begin to feel some improvement.

 

 

Sky - Congratulations on making it to 20 months. Keep hanging in there, I think we're almost to the finsh line.

 

Green - wow -11 hrs sleep! I'm so envious, but very happy for you. That means there is hope for me.

Hope you have a great trip to ?

 

 

 

 

 

[[...]]

Hello everyone,

 

Quick check in as I’m quite busy at work!!

 

Today is better than yesterday,  I think the waterfall of tears helped yesterday.  Paranoia has lessened  (no dead moles), still lingering but not overwhelming like yesterday. Brain fog both physically and mentally strong today maybe because no sleep for 3 nights. I have a new symptom, hurrah;  burning skin. It is really hot here at the moment not sure if that is a contributor, feels like I am sunburnt (I’m not).  Glad Coop and Nova are back. Coop – honestly there’s always something to test us, as if we are not being tested enough. You’re doing amazing dealing with it. 

 

My positive for the day – my beautiful daughter has gone to look round Oxford University today with a view to applying to study English.  I’m so proud of her and wish I could have gone with her. 

 

Welcome to the group Dolphin, everyone is great here.

[[Se...]]

Hi, Dolphins.  Glad to see you here.  Hope you're feeling a bit better today. 

 

As the others have said, there is no scolding here.  Quite the opposite, I've happily found.  Great bunch of empathetic souls who only wish to support each other through a very rough and lonely period in our lives.  Feel free to jump right in, friend.

 

Lots of good healing to you...

Serenity 

 

 

 

 

[[be...]]

Hi team,

I'm a little slow on posting again, but I do try to read and keep up with everyone. Had a rough week, with no sleep and extreme Boatiness. Just haven't felt like doing anything. I think some depression has returned too.  I too feel like crying at times and do, but probably not enough. I'll be starting my 20th month on July 2. I'm hoping to begin to feel some improvement.

 

 

Sky - Congratulations on making it to 20 months. Keep hanging in there, I think we're almost to the finsh line.

 

Green - wow -11 hrs sleep! I'm so envious, but very happy for you. That means there is hope for me.

Hope you have a great trip to ?

 

Korbe, sorry about your rough week. No pressure to come here, sometimes we need the breaks from here.

20 months. You climbed the mountains and swam the oceans!!!!

 

Hang in there and know that improvements are coming your way.

 

[[be...]]

Good evening all, I had a wonderful normal day today. It started out rough but as the day progressed it was all good.

I spent the day at the zoo and walked for hours looking at all of the animals. I dined on hot dogs, French fries, and root beer. Such a special day!!

Hope you all are getting some relief from symptoms.

And I hope I'm able to get out of bed in the morning.

 

Hugs to all.

[[dr...]]

Yay Beulah!!!  That is a wonderful day. 

[[je...]]

Beulah, great to hear you had a great day!

 

Where is everyone?? This thread is too quiet, I hope it's because everyone's doing well! Jenny 

[[be...]]

Jenny, I hope everyone is having a good day. Sometimes when we start feeling better we seem to start living more and getting on with our lives...I hope that's the case here.

Also when people are suffering they come here for support..let's hope it's the above.

How are you doing?

 

[[je...]]

Hi Beulah,

I'm still doing really well! My youngest son woke up this morning sick with a fever, so I'm a tad bit stressed because my oldest son who just had surgery cannot get sick right now considering he is still healing. I disinfected the entire house today, not much else I can do, but hope he doesn't get sick too. He's been on antibiotics all week since the surgery, so I'm hoping that will protect him from whatever my youngest has. This has been a loonnng week, thank goodness I've been pretty much sx free. How are you feeling Beulah, still doing good?

[[Mo...]]

Chalis recommended I join this thread. I am heading into my 12 month. I made some audios I sent to a friend on this site. I had my worst day today and I am very scared. My audios convey what was going on for me this morning. If you decide to respond please be very, very gentle with me. I cant handle any anger or people who may be upset with me. I freak out. I am extremely sensitive to any mild form of criticism or scolding.

 

http://chirb.it/L3vJke 

 

http://chirb.it/sGDP2s

 

Hi Dolphin,

It's going to be ok.  If you go back to the board we started on (6-12months), you can read the progress everyone has made.  Yes, we still suffer now and again.  Some of us more then others but the progress is still there.  I have followed most everyone on here.  Beulah's story is very good to read as her s/x were very severe.  Green and Coop and everyone have suffered long but we all progress.  Nova is also a good read.  All the people on here WOW the progress!!!  Beulah is walking around a zoo eating hot dogs and drinking root beer.  Let me tell you THAT is huge

 

Right now I'm laying in my bed shaking with a headache having just woken from a cortisol rush.  I'm afraid and want to be held but decided to give hubby and my mom a break.  God feels far away and I'm scared.  Yesterday we got back from our vacation trip to the East Coast.  Before we left my s/x had a sudden ramp up.  Last year's vaca caused me a huge set back.  This year I wanted to know I was better, but my body remembered how stressful the trip was and didn't want to get in the plane.  SO, here I lay. 

 

I promise you this gets better.  12 months is an awesome accomplishment.  I thought I would be healed by 12 months but many of us need 2 years.  You are not alone and I promise you it gets better.  Even though I'm in here and need help right now too, it is less and less an issue.  It will be the same for you.

 

Hugs,

MommyR

[[...]]

Gosh it has been quiet on here. I hope everyone is ok.

 

Jenny you have a lot to deal with and you are handling it like a trouper. You sound like a different person these days

 

Beulah, a normal day, wow. Keep going, it won’t be long now for all this to be over.

 

I over did it yesterday. Kind of hard not to as even though I was busy at work, I had a burst of energy when I got home and never stopped until bed time. Wow am I paying for it today or maybe it’s just a coincidence and I’m back in a wave. Felt weird in the night and had vivid dreams. Neck, shoulders and head were so tight when I got up and the fatigue and fog is awful. Breathing rubbish is back. Hopefully things will improve as the day goes on. Yesterday evening I could recognize healing. Hopefully it is going on under all this awfulness. 

 

[[No...]]

Good Morning ... I seem to be having a really loud case of the "flu" these last few days ... feel mostly ornery and miserable ... and not sleeping much ... this "congestion stuff" is now officially getting old ... 

 

Oh well ... bottom line, one hell of a lot better than even a few months ago ... as an old sales mentor once advised ... "smile and dial" ..

 

Be Well ...

[[No...]]

MommyR ... good to hear from you ... I remember your trip last year ... it was a doozy ...

 

Hang on ... we are all getting better ... slow and low seems to be good medicine from time to time ... 

[[No...]]

Marj ... yep ... sounds like that "I may have overdone it flu kind of thing ...

 

I seem to be floating in and out of it these last few weeks ... when it is intense it can be miserable ... and it always passes ... 

[[Si...]]

I feel like utter hell today. I've been able to sleep 6 nights in a row, but got 0 last night. I just don't understand this at all. I'm at my mom's place in FL. I should be enjoying myself but instead feel terrible. I just don't understand how I can't sleep at all. I curse the few weeks that I ever took this shit. It's ruining my life. I'm in a terrible place right now mentally. I feel like I'll never get better. I head back to Atlanta in a few days and then have to contend with work again.